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Anger management easy
Anger management easy
Need for the study of anger management
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Anger and EI
Can you be considered “Emotionally Intelligent” and still get angry? I had to consider that possibility following a conversation with a really dear friend yesterday. Up to that point my knee-jerk answer would have been “No.”
Now, I am not so sure about that. In fact, I think you can be emotionally intelligent and still get angry. Consider for a few moments the nature of “anger.”
Anger is a truly powerful emotion. It can be used either in productive ways or it can be used counter-productive ways. It is sort of like electricity. It can light, heat, or cool our homes. It can also electrocute you. In and of itself it is neither positive nor negative. It just is.
Here are few more things to consider about anger:
Anger is a powerful
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Anger sends signals to all parts of our body to help us fight or flee. Anger energizes us to prepare us for action. Many years ago we were threatened by wild animals who wanted to eat us or an environment that was harsh or inhospitable. Now we more often feel threatened by other human beings, either psychologically or physically.
If indeed we are somewhat “energized” by anger, we would do well to ask ourselves the following question: How can I put this energy to the most productive use? As with the use of other forms of energy such as electricity or oil, we might want to use it efficiently, wisely, and not wastefully.
What is the Emotional Intelligence angle here?
The EI angle is to recognize that anger is actually a secondary or a response emotion. The primary emotion is what we feel immediately before we feel angry. We always feel something else first before we get angry. We just need to learn to recognize
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Those emotions included a sense of less, and to some degree, feeling disrespected and devalued as a business partner. This analysis clearly demonstrates that anger is the secondary emotion. And, truth be known, his anger was justified given the facts that were available at the time.
Having said all of that, the emotionally intelligent individual is able to probe their psyche and identify the events and the emotions that have triggered the anger. They then go on to address those events and primary emotions rather than the anger that is the natural response.
In conclusion, here are some questions to consider before responding in anger:
What am I afraid of?
What feelings came just before the anger?
What other feelings am I feeling?
What or who is trying to control me?
What or who am I trying to control?
What you can I control?
What is beyond my control?
I hope this helps you in your pursuit of higher levels of emotional intelligence. We are here and available to help you if you are looking for resources or coaching in the area of Emotional
Humans experience a broad variety of emotions during their life. Every human comes into contact with all of their emotions at least once in their life. One of those emotions is anger. Anger can be seen in every aspect of human culture. This emotion is frequently expressed in many forms of literature from subtle sub points to main themes. Understanding anger is necessary before understanding how it plays into the stories, Hamlet, “A Raisin in the Sun,” and “Sweat.”
Carol Tavris (1944- ), an American social psychologist and feminist, "sees anger as an instinctual survival response" (1) .she sees that getting angry is a natural habit to all humans as everyone can get angry in any time. Tavris says in her book Anger :the misunderstood emotion "Lonard Bekowitz calls advocates of this view 'vertilationists', because they believe it is unhealthy to bottle up feelings" (43) . (Print)
If anger were a disease, there would be an epidemic in this country. Road Rage, spousal and child abuse, and a lack of civility are just a few examples. Emotionally mature people know how to control their thoughts and behaviors how to resolve conflict. Conflict is an inevitable art of school and work, but it can be resolved in a positive way.
Emotional Intelligence, also known as ‘EI’, is defined as the ability to recognize, authoritize and evaluate emotions. The ability to control and express our own emotions is very important but so is our ability to understand, interpret and respond to the emotions of others. To be emotionally intelligent one must be able to perceive emotions, reason with emotions, understand emotions and manage emotions.
Anger is a signal …. It may be a message that we are being hurt, that our rights are being violated; that our needs or wants are not being adequately met or simply that something is not right ( 1).
and pleasure, the body changes into a relaxed state. When an individual is angry different
The scope of emotional intelligence includes the verbal and nonverbal appraisal and expression of emotion, the regulation of emotion in the self and others, and the utilization of emotional content in problem solving. (pp. 433)
Emotional Intelligence is this ability for yourself to recognize and understand emotions for yourself and those around you. This ability helps you manage your behavior and relationships to get a better perspective for others. We citizens all have emotions, we use it all the time. It affects how we manage behavior, navigate social skills, and makes personal decisions that achieve great positive results. Of course we need to dig into the bottom of how it works, this ability is made up of four core skills that are made up with two primary sources: personal competence and social competence. How these two work is simple, personal competence is basically made up for your self-awareness and self-management skills (self-awareness is your ability to
Myers, L. L. & Tucker, M. L. (2005). Increasing Awareness of Emotional Intelligence In A Business Curriculum. Business Communication Quarterly, 68, pp. 44-50.
Anger is, perhaps, the most notorious of all human emotions. It has the ability to spring up when we least expect it, an almost natural and inherent response to an offense or frustration. Humanity’s natural tendency to engage in a primal “fight or flight” response to challenges has unavoidably led to anger being a primary response for many. Still for others, anger is a longer lasting thing, taking root and burning into ashes of bitterness or misgiving. It is obvious that anger is unhealthy – it almost defies intuition to say anything further. However, it remains a complex human emotion. Sure, everyone feels it at some point or another. But where does it come from? How does it manifest? And, most importantly, how can it be taken under control? a detailed examination of the nature of anger and, in response, how it may be managed, may give further insight into this human emotion.
Anger can be a destructor like none other. While we, as humans, need anger as a part of the human condition because of the protective system that it provides us with, thereby, shielding us from harm, too much of anger can land us to situations we otherwise would not want to see ourselves in.
Anger changes the behavior pattern of the person as a result of changes in his emotional status. it is accompanied by physiological and biological changes. Actions resulting from anger often lead to undesirable physiological and health consequences, because the neuro-transmitters/hormones (eg. adrenaline) released during anger intensify impulsive action and obscure rational
The best way to prevent unproductive anger is to come to an inherent understanding of what it is you believe and how to best channel it into a result you want. You start by encountering every possible belief out there, no matter how outlandish it may seem to you and you think on it. You think on it for however long it may take for you to come to a full understanding of why that someone may believe such things. Then you deliberate with them on those
Applying these aspects of emotional intelligence has a significant enhancing effect on every aspect of life. It allows one to be self aware, improving the ability to process information about oneself accurately (Goleman, 2008). Emotional intelligence also affects management of mood in that it enhances one’s ability to manage emotions, create moods of positivity, and defuse bad moods. Emotional intelligence also comes in handy with regards to motivation of self. It increases an individual’s ability to overcome frustration, the ability to be persistent, ability to engage in tasks that are boring, but necessary, and to be involved in and cut out productive and non-productive actions respectively.
Anger is a familiar emotion to most people, but not everyone experiences it the same way. What might be mildly annoying to one person might cause someone else to experience rage. The triggers for anger also varies as do the ways that people deal with this emotion. Since anger is a natural response to things that can cause harm to ourselves or our loved there is no need to eliminate this emotion. However, it can also be a destructive emotion when not under control, which means there is a need for it to be managed effectively.