As individuals, we are constantly learning what to say, do or think. Almost everything that we do is a result of learning it. Some things, we learn at a young age; while others may take years to obtain the knowledge. Assertiveness, is one aspect of learning and it is one of the toughest to obtain; but why? Is it not easy to stand up for what is right or say your own, opinion, maybe saying no, an easy two letter word? Well no, it is not easy, some people struggle with, this on an everyday basis. They try to figure themselves out and wonder why they weren’t honest or why did they let themselves be used. These are the questions I constantly had when I was growing up, not realizing that all I needed was to learn how to overcome my passive-aggressive …show more content…
One of the few steps that have helped me immensely are step 1, step 5, step 9 and step 17. Each of these steps has their own way changing a person’s perspective. The first step says we are required to observe our behavior; does what we say affect us in a negative or positive way? What we need to analyze is whether or not we are subconsciously insulting someone or are they offended by what we said? We need to think before we speak, and that is a problem for some people, including me, I am a social extrovert and occasionally I may make impulsive responses and won’t realize what I said before I realize someone did not like what I said. However, that is when step 5 comes into place, it talks about reviewing our responses in order to see our thought process and what were some strengths. Another is to practice positive thoughts one thing we need to keep in mind, we need to be assertive with ourselves, at times we can be our worst enemy so being self-motivated can help you in the long run by having confidence and how others with positive conversations. Additionally, with positive reinforcements comes rewards, the last step, says it is important to provide ourselves ongoing support and receive a reward for asserting ourselves this way we can have encouragement at the end of our
In chapter nine of Messages, assertiveness training is presented as a way “to express your feelings, thoughts, and wishes, and to stand up for your legitimate rights without violating the rights of others.” (McKay, Davis, Fanning, 2009, p. 125) According to McKay, Davis, and Fanning (2009), “assertiveness is a social behavior that can be learned” (p.125) Assertiveness that is presented in a way that is used to express ‘your’ feelings and not necessarily to interpret someone else’s connects directly with the single contingency method. As assumptions number four of the skills and tools model of communication states that communication skills are trainable like motor skills, assertiveness skills such as passiveness, aggressiveness, and assertiveness are presented in a way that may be taught to use in appropriate situations to depict your feelings and your wishes. The book differentiates between a skill that is similar to a personality trait, and assertiveness that can be acquired, which contradicts assumption number four because it suggests that learning to communicate is similar to learning jumping jacks. It also specifies that assertiveness is used to initiate your own message instead of another’s reaction.
When person at work or someone I come in contact with decides to give me an attitude or talk to me in a rude manner I try to think to myself “maybe they are just having a bad day” but most often I just get upset and take it to heart; even when I know I shouldn’t. I also express my feelings very easily, I can be open to anyone about how I am feeling and in a way I think that could also be a good thing. I will continue to better myself in this way, to not get so upset over things that are not directed toward me and things I am not at fault for and I think that will help me become a better
Rejection. A word that I despise; and is something that has happened to me so many times in so many different ways. One of those ways was being rejected from one of my many college choices because my SAT scores did not reach their requirements. “Why apply?” you may ask, although my SAT scores did not meet their requirements, everything else on my application was perfect. I had great grades in high school, I volunteered many times; both inside and outside of school, I always helped around in my school administration whenever help was needed, and I always dedicated a month of my summer just to help my school give out the school books to students and sell the school uniforms. Doing all those things and being rejected made me feel like I was nothing; like what I did in my school life was all a waste. After taking all of those things into consideration, I still got rejected because of my SAT scores; which is why I genuinely believe that colleges should admit students using criteria other than their SAT scores.
“The true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him” (G.K. Chesterton). A soldier is a soldier no matter what. If they fight behind a screen, on the front line, or from a controller as long as they’re protecting this country, the people in it, and the people fighting for it they are honorable. Some think that because one does their fighting from a remote control drone means that they have no understanding of war, and in some ways that is true, but they are still taking someone’s life when they choose to press that button just like the solders on the front line takes someone’s life when they pull the trigger. Both people are fighting the same fight: they love the country they are defending the people in it they just do it from different standpoints. Drones
Over the years, the cost of college tuition has been one of the central issues limiting students, like me, from obtaining the best education that one could receive. Usually, this results in students settling for a school nearby rather than being able to have the choice to go to the best one in which they were accepted into, due to such skyrocket prices. Much of this problem or concern has to do with out-of-state tuition being much higher than in-state tuition, sometimes almost doubling the price of in-state tuition! Therefore, students are more pressured to remain in state rather than go to out-of-state schools that may offer a better education.
In my life I strive to be the best person I can be, I find myself always wanting to learn and grow. This comes from myself never wanting to become stagnate in life. If I can learn and grow from the people and the places around me I will become a well-rounded and efficient person in society. I have come to realize that t I have my fault in my communication and so do others. I think one of the biggest things I have to work on is transferring “You” statements into “I” statements. Working in law enforcement the “You” statement can get people fired up very quickly where as if I used an “I” statement it would probably make the situation allot better for everyone and make things move quicker.
According to Fablo, a 10-year-old called in a fake bomb threat to his school. A 15-year-
Overcoming adversity is imperative. In fact, you can 't have the happiness and success you want unless you have adversity in your life and overcome it. It is essential for progressing into who you want to be. It shows you what you are made of. It teaches you more about yourself, how to approach what you want, and how to maintain the success that you have. Without it, you wouldn 't know how far you could go or how capable you are because you wouldn 't have anything to push you or compare to.
I had never really considered the definition of assertive behavior, nor had I ever contemplated my own assertiveness level. I generally think of assertiveness more as a state of being, not really something that I need to strive for. After reviewing Module One and researching assertiveness and assertion training, I realize that I have not Dbeen realistic about what assertiveness entails. According to Beagrie (2006), “Many people confuse assertiveness with being bossy, overbearing or aggressive. Being assertive is simply the ability to stand up for yourself, state your views, tackle issues up-front and, in many cases, stop others from taking advantage” (p. 24). I can admit that up until now, I was one of those confused people. I have often viewed assertive people as somewhat bossy and overbearing. Even when I have needed to be assertive, I have felt that people may view me in a negative way . In reality, I now see that there is absolutely nothing wrong with expressing how I feel as long as I continue to respect those around me.
1.Fred told Tony that polka-dotted underwear was showing through the ripped seat of his dress pants.
A lot of people don’t know that they have to do more with their education and get a good paying job. If you are declined a job that you know you will enjoy, but don 't have the college papers for a job can get disappointing. Some people are not inspired to go to college, and others can’t afford it. Other issues involved with the skills gap for jobs is the high requirements for that area of work, and peoples soft skills. High school is supposed to help you plan you for the real world, but not many classes help teach you the real world. This forms the skills gap in America, this stops people from being able to progress in today’s community.
Education is a huge topic of controversy, society is always trying to reform what we know as education today. Right now, the first 12 years of education are entirely free for students directly, but in the end are paid for by the taxpayers of the town. The question is, why should only grades k-12 be free why not a college education too? On the other hand, there are some exceptions to free schooling at the k-12 levels. The most prominent being, Private schooling, most towns in the United States have at least one if not many private schools. They require a certain amount in tuition for each of its students every year. An example of this, in my town Salem, NH one of the most known private catholic schools is St. Joseph 's. I had a good friend a few years back
Positive Discipline is a concept that can be extremely misinterpreted and when it is misused it can cause more harm than good. A common form of discipline for children is punishment and it is widely used because it is the believed to be very effective. “However, discipline comes from the Latin word discipulus or disciplini, which means a follower of truth, principle, or a venerated leader” (Nelson, pg. 15). Punishment in itself is not a positive method nor is it a positive form of leadership to follow or exert. (Quote) By eliminating punishment, using the kind but firm technique, and having mutual respect, child abuse can be significantly reduced or even prevented.
understand that being proactive is one of the most powerful ways to ensure my success. One of the keys to my success is the ability to think about my own thought process. This is called self awareness, and this is the reason humanity can make significant advances from generation to generation. Self awareness allows me to evaluate and learn from my own experiences and the experiences of others. This is the key to making and breaking my habits. Only when I take how I see myself into account will I be able to access my full personal potential and my ability to relate to others. Thanks to self awareness, I can examine my paradigms and determine if they are based in reality. The key to being self aware is to reject the social mirror that feeds
So far, my self-concept has changed positively and in time, it will improve (optimists). The only difficulty that I have been facing is the ability to defend myself against negative comments from others. Because of my thinking process speed, it takes time for me to acquire comments and how to say them immediately. In addition, I found that it is not necessary to give a response back to negative comments in order to defend yourself, except in courtrooms. Nonverbal expressions are also as powerful. For example, ignoring critical comments create a serious climate between you and the speaker –sending a message that the comment was unnecessary and offensive. But in some cases, verbal messages are necessary, such as that in debates over issues.