Attraction Theory Attraction theory essentially posits that people are more likely to be attracted to those who have similarities to themselves, on the other hand, there are some who attract the opposite personality to theirs. Key concepts of this theory are that it is typified by various characteristics that a person has, as well as components of their personality and overall being. They may have similarities such as” hones/ethical” or their appearance is attractive to the person. (DeVito 2016) Another, is personality traits as self-esteem, shyness and optimism are likely to be shared and exhibited between people who have some form of relationship between them. The central strength of this theory is that it is people often prefer sharing …show more content…
As an illustration, tension in relationship can result from having money problems, seems to be the biggest problem for couples. As a result, there seems to be a lot of fighting going on in the relationship. Another, problem may be in the relationship, there is one or both partners re interested in someone else (coldness or openness) or one may be seeing someone, which cause confusion and arguing among themselves (DeVito 2016). Therefore, the theory posits that relationships can succumb to pressures that are often associated with maintaining connections and relationships, and the communication patterns can be affected by these forms of instability. (DeVito 2016) Equally important, patterns in communication that create a constant state of imbalance acts in such a way that it is adverse to cultivating and sustaining developed relationships. There are four principle concepts that are associated with this theory: opposing needs and desire, connection with others, autonomy and independence. (DeVito 2016 Pg. 236). One of the most prominent strengths of this theory is the practicality that is associated with rebalance of your life. It provides a sense of stability in relationships when someone utilizes the theory correctly. Communication strategies are taught in this theory which is great. For example, the principle issues is that it assumes that …show more content…
As such, communication forms move from shallow, relatively non-intimate levels to those that are more intimate and deeply personal (DeVito 2016). In short, it has infiltrated the very interior of the individual’s personality in such an intensified way. . The theory supports the idea that relationships get deeper as communication begins to increase, but the stages themselves aren 't clearly defined and the criteria which constitutes each stage is also vague in many ways. Another, principle strengths in this theory is that it allows the platform for understanding and showing progress in relationships, but on the other hand, it can make a sudden change in direction. As a result, the relationship then heads toward deteriorate path. It goes in another direction of depenetration, which seems to be the beginning of the end of the relationship. However, the stages that are associated with this theory present an interesting take on how relationships develop, and how suddenly they can end. Therefore, I thought the weakness was that this theory had interesting facts about it, but the deeper the relationship got the faster it was over. Not to mention once the relationship was over the couple could now talk about their problems, but could not bring themselves to do it while being together, which was a little confusing. In
Chapters 5 and 6 in Extraordinary Relationships gave a good introduction into new concepts relating to Human Interactions and Relationships. These new concepts give a better idea in understanding relationship patterns and the various emotions that come along with relationships. Two concepts that stood out to me that were discussed throughout the chapter were relationship patterns and relationship emotions. Over time many relationships develop their own unique patterns. In many cases these patterns have been part of the individual all along. Gilbert (1992) states “Usually what people do in a relationship crises is more of the same thing they have been doing, only more intensely and more anxiously” (pg.36). When individuals go through relationship
It is not all about communication” . It says that not surprisingly those couples who reported communicating more effectively showed the highest satisfaction with their relationships. But the next two reasons which were also the only other ones with strong links to couple happiness, were knowledge of partner which included everything from knowing their pizza-topping preferences to their hopes and dreams and life skills like being able to hold a job, manage money, etc . But in order to have a healthy relationship I do believe that the communication is key but they also do need to know how to communicate in a healthy way that will not cause
Communications generally occur in body languages: how the individuals interpret each other. Her essay is an event that is reoccurring more and more lately. The event results in a failure in marriage. In today’s society more and more people are splitting up or having divorces due to miscommunications. The essay, “Sex, Lies and Conversation,” that Deborah Tannen wrote is much use of today because it explains where miscommunications happen and she has her own studies and research to back it up. The essay goes into depth about her ideologies that cause miscommunications. Look at a miscommunication twice and do not be quick to judge because it will save plenty of
Human’s put a tremendous amount of brain energy and time into obtaining happiness, which is normally associated with finding the “perfect” mate. Many aspects go into the process that is used to determine if one person is better suited than another. Appearance, age, and personality all contribute to someone’s level of attraction to another. Opposites attract is a common myth stating that those levels of attraction are based of extreme differences between the individuals and that difference is what produces the attraction.
Effective communication is one of the most important things to maintain a happy relationship. Communication will help to create a better atmosphere and to know what are the interests, thoughts and feelings of your loved one. All romantic relationships need a lot of communications from both sides. The main factor is interpersonal communication, which couples are able to overlap environments and create a relationship. We reviewed the movie “The Breakup” and have found the concepts of Integrating, differentiating, and terminating. This movie shows how ineffective communication can dissolve a relationship. The lack of communication is the main factor why Brooke and Gary break up. This couple tends to rely on other people instead of trying to solve their problems talking to each other. They avoid talking because every time a new conflict will begin. In many of the scenes the couple creates big arguments from small issues. In this paper, we will explain the scenes of the movie that can be compared to the interpersonal communication concepts.
Communication is essential for a positive and healthy relationship. In the movie “The Break Up” poor communication skills are demonstrated, resulting in an unhealthy relationship. Gary and Brooke both fail to handle their problems like adults. The couple tends to rely on other people instead of trying to solve their own problems. When differences arise, couples should be able to talk it out cooperatively. Throughout this movie there are several examples of miscommunication. This movie shows how poor communication can dissolve a relationship. Three of the main theories demonstrated in this movie are conflict management, verbal and nonverbal communication.
Since time immemorial, social interactions, and the subsequent relationships that bloom from them, have been often explained by the old adage “Birds of a feather flock together”. This refers to a fact of simple human nature: we are most attracted to things that share traits with us. For example, those with a penchant for thrill-seeking behavior and activities will not be attracted to a person of shrewish nature. Our attraction to similar people fosters cognitive synergy, pack-behavior and a need for cohabitation which are just a few deeply rooted predispositions that our early ancestors needed in order to survive. In short, the want for similarity is pure human instinct. However, the equally as old adage “Opposites attract” rings just as true as the aforementioned one. As with most things in life, when there is an up there must be a down. Differences in traits, on a purely biological level, promote genetic stability and increased survivability of a race. Socially, these differences are like shampoo to conditioner; alone they function adequately enough but when used in conjunction, the result far outstrips the sum of its parts. Balance is often the key to having a fulfilling bond. While it is near impossible to discern the perfect ingredients for building relationships, it stands to reason that the presence of similarities (or lack thereof) between two people can have an effect on their initial encounter, future interactions and potential romantic involvement. Whether it has purely physical or social origins, research and the observations associated with it affirm that the role of similarity is not as simple as one mig...
This congruency theory suggests that congruency within an interpersonal relationship would likely create mutual feelings of liking – or attraction. A few possible explanations for any supportive data for the congruency theory might include: attraction of one participant in the relationship having the basis of their belief of congruency with the other participant in the relationship being that of how they perceive their behavior to be, rather than how that participant’s behavior actually is. Another explanation may be the fact that how one perceives their self could easily be the result of their need to feel similar to the other participant, who they already have established attraction for. The final explanation the authors provide is that there is some confounding variable that is influencing both the participants’ liking towards one another and the measured congruency
This theory describes how relationships develop from the superficial to the intimate level and from few to many areas of interpersonal interaction. Just like Knapp's model there are stages to forming a relationship. In this theory though we learn about the breadth, the number of topics you and your partner talk about and the depth, the degree to which you penetrate the inner personality of the other individual. The textbook provides us with a figure that helps visualize the breadth and depth of our relationships. This is called Models of Social Penetration, in this model we see three circles labeled circle one, two, and three. Circle one is the superficial level where the relationship had low breadth and a small depth. This relates to when my father and I first moved in together, things were a bit awkward we talked some but about normal daily things such as tv shows and things I did at school that day things that are not so personal. The second circle becomes more intense, the topics get more serious. This stage was when my dad became more relaxed around me and started asking me questions about my family and about my feelings. Lastly is circle three. This one is the most in depth and has the most breadth, the book states that this is a relationship you might have with a lover or a parent. This stage finally hit my father and I when we became one hundred percent comfortable around eachother and get a special bond. this
Using John Lee’s six styles of love and Sternberg’s triangular theory of love, I will discuss to separate relationships and how they relate to them. The two couples I chose to interview are from different generations, but both love their partner immensely. Throughout my interviews with the couples, I practiced active listening and got to know more about how their relationships worked.
I think this can be used in any type of relationship other than a couple. I’m not in a personal relationship, but I can relate to the information discussed in the textbook about the different relational maintenance strategies. In my regular family and friendship relationships, I’ve used strategies such as positivity and joint activities. I try to stay positive when I’m interacting with friends or family because you can push people away when you make your conversations or experiences negative. Also, I like to accommodate my interests for other peoples interests so that we both like to do similar activities and try new things which can help grow the relationship.
The five traits that make up the Big Five Theory are Extraversion, Neuroticism, Agreeableness, Conscientiousness, and Openness to Experience. Extraversion is linked to the habit of experiencing positive emotions. The category of extraversion includes assertiveness, talkativeness and sociability. Neuroticism is linked to the habit of experiencing negative emotions. Extraversion includes feelings of anxiety, self-consciousness, and irritability. Having low self-esteem would give you a high score in Extraversion in a personality test. Agreeableness is one’s care towards another, their concern for their needs, wishes, and rights. If a person is high in Agreeableness they would be polite and compassionate, if they are low in Agreeableness they would be unsympathetic and possibly aggressive. If a person is Agreeable, they cherish a good understanding of others emotions and what people seek out to do in their lives. Conscientiousness is the ability to conform to rules and self-efficiency. Conscientious people are self-disciplined, keep things in order, and don’t get distracted and keep themselves on track with their goals. Openness includes traits such as imagination, intellectual engagement, and aesthetic interest (Deyoung, 2010). Open people are appreciative of adventure, emotion, curiosity, unusual ideas, art and
For example, if you know the romantic rules of the relationship rules theory then you should have a better awareness of what to do and what not to do in order to make a relationship work. Although you do have to know that there is a difference in romantic rules, as well as in other relationship theories, from one culture to the next. With the relationship dialects theory, it is imperative to know the opposing motives or desires within an interpersonal relationship. Autonomy and connection are an example of one of the three opposing motives; you can wish to still be an independent person while also wanting to connect closely to another person and grow the relationship. People often worry that they will lose their identity if they become too involved with their partner. If you understand the relationship dialects theory, then you will be able to deal with these issues through the ways it
Friedman, R. C., Downy, J.I. (1995) Biology and the Oedipus complex. Psychoanalytic Quarterly, 64, 234-264
When there is a lack of communication, relationships seem to fall apart. So for that matter, two people who were suppose to be partner, eventually end up going to court for to get legally separated. After all, when there is little to no communication or any other type of emotional connection, divorce seems to be the only way to resolve the problem. “Many couples marry because they share similar beliefs, but as time changes so do people.” (Odinity.com). Another problem that led to lack of communication is that everyone is so busy working; they don’t feel they need to talk to their husband or wife. Some couples are often quiet even when they have problems with each other, but decided to not deal with it instead. As a consequence, little problems will begin to expand to become bigger problems, resulting in divorce. This does not happen in a happy marriage because the partners in a healthy relationship seem to have a more open way of talking with each other. They discuss everything to be sure that they are on the same page, so to speak. Divorce is commonly done because of this lack of being able to talk openly to each other, and express their feelings and emotions. Nevertheless, this is not the main problem as to why people are getting divorce. As the economy grows, so does the human’s intellectual. Couple therapy is a very popular solution to most marriages problem nowadays. If people feel like their marriage is at risk, many chooses the option of going to couple therapy. It not only is effective, many stated that it is satisfying. “Over 98 percent of those surveyed reported that they received good or excellent couples therapy, and over 97 percent of those surveyed said they got the help they needed.”