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Essay about stages of grief
Essay about stages of grief
Five stages of grief
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The “The Kübler-Ross Five Stages of Grief” is, in my experience, the psychological anecdote most familiar to the layman. In it, the framework is laid for how the average human typically responds to a life altering tragedy. The model presents us with a rocky and emotional road from denial to acceptance – the sort of journey one would certainly be expected to embark upon should a sudden and tragic death befall their beloved mother.
Such a tragedy is exactly what happens to the protagonist in the very first sentence of the existential opus titled “L'Étranger,” by Algerian author, Albert Camus.
Meursault (as his name would be), however, is for some reason incomprehensible to his fellow Franco-Algerians, seemingly untouched by this catastrophe of catastrophes and carries on with his life without shedding so much as a tear. He is ostensibly an emotionless exception to the Five Stages and appears to have skipped, untroubled, directly from the occurrence of tragedy to final acceptance.
This is frighteningly unsettling to his peers for a number of reasons, namely that it represents an apparent hole in his ability to “feel,” a quality they believe to be so central to their lives that its lack might make him somehow less human than they.
Through the use of first person narrative however, Camus makes it quite clear that Meursault is indeed human – deeply so in fact. As Meursault is forced to wait in the harsh, glaring light of the morgue for the others who might wish to view the body of his mother, he displays a conscience disregard for the “la politesse” that accompanies such a formal situation; he gives in to his desire to light up a cigarette in front of his late maman. He hesitates first but quickly shrugs off potential...
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...py death, these are questions for a dawn beyond that of the guillotine.”
Meursault, though curious and at times perplexing, is shown in these last moments for what he truly is: Human. Nothing more, nothing less.
He experiences, just like the rest of us, profound and deeply cutting loss.
He fights, just like the rest of us, to maintain tranquility even in denial.
He surrenders, just like the rest of us, to melancholy and depression.
He does, just like the rest of us, plead and bargain when all hope is gone.
He lashes out, just like the rest of us, even at those who wish to help.
He finds, in the end, just as we all hope to find, peace and contentment.
Whether intentional or not, Camus's “etranger” follows to perfection, the classic “Five Stages of Grief” as he journeys from the tragic loss of his mother to his decisive and bloody end on the guillotine.
...inal moments. Secondly, by embracing his fate, he gains a sense of compassion from the reader, who, by default, will begin to feel pity for this tortured soul. Morally, it would be impossible to judge this sort of act "evil," but also equally difficult to label it "good." Again, this is Camus' personal philosophy emerging through his literature, almost seeming to beg the audience not to pronounce judgment.
Hamlet throughout the play lives in a world of mourning. This bereavement route he experiences can be related to Elizabeth Kubler-Ross’s theory on this process. The death of Hamlet’s spirit can be traced through depression, denial and isolation, bargaining, anger, and acceptance. The natural sorrow and anger of Hamlet’s multiple griefs include all human frailty in their protest and sympathy and touch upon the deepest synapses of grief in our own lives, not only for those who have died, but for those, like ourselves, who are still alive. Hamlet’s experience of grief, and his recovery from it, is one it which we ourselves respond most deeply.
Meursault is a fairly average individual who is distinctive more in his apathy and passive pessimism than in anything else. He rarely talks because he generally has nothing to say, and he does what is requested of him because he feels that resisting commands is more of a bother than it is worth. Meursault never did anything notable or distinctive in his life: a fact which makes the events of the book all the more intriguing.
Meursault, an unemotional, a moral, sensory-orientated character at the beginning of the book, turns into an emotional, happy man who understands the "meaninglessness" and absurdity of life by the end of the book. Meursault realizes that the universe is indifferent to man's life and this realization makes him happy. He realizes that there is no God and that the old codes of religious authoritarianism are not enough to suffice man's spiritual needs. One has to create one's won meaning in an absurd, meaningless world.
L'Étranger is a story about a French Algerian that kills an Arab written by Albert Camus, a French author. A quote said by the main character from L'Étranger is repeated twice by Bassam: “Mother died today. Or yesterday maybe, I can’t be sure.” Bassam can closely relate to the character in the book he reads as they both don’t react to death in an unconventional way, evident by Bassam’s reaction after his own mother’s death by stating “I had no sadness to spare or parade” (De Niro’s Game 86). Bassam doesn't cry or display grieve in public, he doesn’t dramatically throw himself on his mother’s coffin or faint from the overwhelming misery of it all like others believe he would, instead he quietly shuts himself inside his house neglecting his wellbeing and finds liberation in her death since he can leave all of Lebanon behind. Additionally, Bassam reacts to George’s retelling of the massacre in an unconventional way as well. Bassam doesn’t care or is shocked about the massacre, but rather is more focused on trying to escape out of the conversation. However, later on Bassam laughs at the absurdity of this statement from L'Étranger, not because it is unreasonable or unusual, but how accurately it portrays his emotional indifference to his mother’s death compared to other people. Bassam finds validation in a corrupt individual that belongs to a major colonial power that inadvertently caused Bassam’s hardship. However, his inner turmoil about his mother is complicated through another L'Étranger quote: “This man who is morally guilty of his mother’s death.” (224) Even though, Bassam didn’t physically kill his mother, he feels responsible for the death of his mother, by refusing to go inside the shelter with her thus leaving his mother upstairs when the bomb struck, but more importantly “morally guilty” that he found liberation instead of sadness in her death.
Meursault is a man who chooses to observe people, rather than interact with them. He often people watches from his balcony in the evening, than actually going down to communicate with them. While he was in exile, he was forced to converse and discuss his feeling to strangers like his lawyer, and the chaplain of the prison. Due to being a severe introvert, the idea of discussing his problem to another person was foreign for him. The experience of opening himself up to others for help was alienating, and contradicted his personality of being a stranger to everyone. Camus writes, “He didn’t understand me, and he was sort of holding it against me. I felt the urge to reassure him that I was like everybody else, just like everybody else.” (Camus, 66) Meursault wanted to help his lawyer understand his point of view, but his nature is so closed off that he’s unable to put his feeling into words for others
Only twice in the novel does Meursault experience extreme pressure, once from nature and once from society, and at these points he gives himself over to his beast. This proves devastating from a certain point of view: the first time he compromises his chances of living, and the second time he compromises his chance of an afterlife. This self-preservation instinct is the only thing that keeps him in touch with his bestial side, and in spite of these consequences he triumphs over life in that he remains unique, he does not conform.
In 1969 Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, a psychiatrist, published the Pioneering book On Death and Dying. The work acquainted the world with the grieving process, called the five stages of grief. Kübler-Ross gathered her research from studying individuals with terminal cancer (Johnson, 2007). The first stage of the grieving process is denial. In this stage the person refuses to believe that their loved one is deceased, a common thought during this period is, “This can’t be happening to me” (Johnson, 2007).The second stage of the grieving process is anger. In this level the person becomes frustrated with their circumstances, a customary complaint is “Why is this happening to me?” (Johnson, 2007). The third stage of the grieving process is bargaining. At this point the individual hopes that they can prevent their grief, this typically involves bartering with a higher power, and an ordinary observance during this time is “I will do anything to have them back” (Johnson, 2007). The fourth and most identifiable stage of grief is depression. This phase is habitually the lengthiest as...
The emotionless anti-hero, Monsieur Meursault, embarks on a distinct philosophical journey through The Stranger. Confident in his ideas about the world, Meursault is an unemotional protagonist who survives without expectations or even aspirations. Because of his constant indifference and lack of opinions about the world, it can be denoted that he undergoes a psychological detachment from the world and society. It is through these characteristics that exist in Meursault that Camus expresses the absurd. Starting from the very first sentence of the book, “Maman died today. Or maybe yesterday, I don’t know.” (Camus 1) The indifferent tone from these short sentences convey a rather apathetic attitude from Meursault’s part. Not only does he not feel any sorrow, he also “felt like having a smoke.” (Camus 4) Communicating perfectly Meursault’s disinterest, “[he] hesitate, [he] didn’t know if [he] could do it with Maman right there. [He] thought it over; it really didn’t matter.” (Camus 4) The death of his mother prompts an absurdist philosophy in which he experiences a psychological awakening and begins to place no real emphasis on emotions, but rather on the physical aspect of life.
Meursault is very much like someone autistic. Autism is a developmental disorder which affects a person’s communication skills, social restrictions and behavior. Like people with autism, Meursault doesn’t know when to show emotions nor think they are important. You can see this pattern in Meursault when he is informed about his mother’s passing. It does not seem to affect him at all and shows this by saying “Maman died today. Or yesterday maybe, I don’t know” (Camus 3).
It is common for those experiencing grief to deny the death altogether. Many people do this by avoiding situations and places that remind them of the deceased (Leming & Dickinson, 2016). However, by simply avoiding the topic of death and pain, the mourner only achieves temporary relief while in turn creating more permanent lasting agony (Rich, 2005). In this stage, mourners will begin to feel the full weight of the circumstance. Whether the death of a loved one was sudden or long-term, survivors will feel a full range of emotions, such as sadness, guilt, anger, frustration, hopelessness, or grief. While many of these emotions can cause serious suffering, it is important for the survivor to feel whatever emotions come up and deal with those feelings, rather than trying to suppress any
Meursault felt isolation from everyone and himself against himself against the world, the feeling that he was not belonging to the world was destroying him. Meursault is indifferent from people in society, his sense of significance to the community was lacking and made him feel betrayed and depressed. However, when he found others that were similar to him, Meursault found kinship in humanity and how there are others like him.
... mother, he does not react in a way most people do. He does not cry but instead accepts what has happened and realizes that he can not change it. He goes back and does physical things he would do on a normal day. When the caretaker offers him coffee, he accepts it, he smokes a cigarette and has sex with a woman he just met. Meursault also does not lie to escape death. He refuses to conform to society and lie. He would rather be seen as an outsider than do something that he does not believe in. Finally, Meursault, will not believe in G-d or Christianity just because it is the only thing to turn to before he is put to death. When Meursault decides not to cry at his mother’s funeral, he accepts himself as an outsider. When he is considered an outsider, it does not matter if he is guilty or innocent; at the end of the day he guilty just for being different.
When Meursault's mother dies his reaction is surprisingly dull. He reacts in a way that seems like he doesn't care. His unpredictable reaction...
Meursault is distant from set plans, ambitions, desires, love, and emotions in general. He has a difficult time with emotions such as regret and compassion. The reader sees the nature of his personality in the first few lines of the novel: "Maman died today. Or yesterday maybe, I don't know." When he hears of the death of his mother through a telegram, he is unattached, and can be considered uncaring.