George Catlin's Spiritual Farewell

Although communal mourning ended with the giveaway, it marked the beginning of the intimate mourning rituals of the immediate family. George Catlin witnessed these intimate mourning practices in 1832 and recorded his observations in his journal:

Fathers, mothers, wives, and children may be seen lying under these scaffolds, prostrated upon the ground with their faces in the dirt, howling further incessantly the more piteous and heart-broken cries and lamentations for the misfortunes of their kindred; tearing their hair - cutting their flesh with knives, and doing other pence to appease the spirits of the dead, whose misfortunes they attribute to some sin or omission of their own, for they sometimes inflict the most excruciating self torture.

Outside observers described the practice as a sign of uncontrollable grief or a pagan custom of self-mutilation . For the Mandan and Hidatsa women, however, self-sacrifice was a deeply spiritual process and enabled them to beseech the spirits on behalf of their relatives. In addition to demonstrating their grief through the physical wounds inflicted by self-sacrifice, the women offered their flesh and fingers to Sun and the Woman Above, two spirits connected to death and the decay of the body. In some cases, the self-sacrifice was also ascribed to other spirits for guidance in restoring rest and peace to relatives who were murdered or died tragically. Virginia Peters’ Women of the Earth Lodge records a story of one such

Women sat near the skulls of their children or husbands weeping and talking to the spirits. They brought their daily work like quillwork or hides to prepare, and shared part of normal life with their clan members. Before they left the circles, many women left food for their relatives next to their skulls. The Mandan and Hidatsa did not believe the dead needed food; rather it was a means of maintaining normalcy and including the dead in the practical components of familial life. By spending time with the skulls and bringing them food and conversation, the women continued their relationship with the spirits of their children or husbands. The spiritual world interacted with the physical, and as long there was a clan or village, the spirits belonged in their homes and with their families. Mourning in the skull circles was a period of healing for the women during which they transitioned from acute mourning and self sacrifice in the burying ground to a new normal without the physical presence of husband or child. Over time, mothers and widows spent less time in the skull circles and reintegrated into village life. Other children were born and widows remarried; however, there was always a profound connection between women and the spirits of the clan