Some theorists, like Lakoff, that both genders are innately different when it comes to communication and therefore both genders are treated differently (Lakoff 1975: 50). Foels, Driskell, Mullen, and Salas believe that both genders do not communicate differently in the least and instead communication techniques vary according to the situation or context in which a person interacts (Foels, Driskell, Mullen, Salas 200: 676-677). Some, like Tannen and Wood, even believe that the main distinction between male and female talk is not that both genders communicate differently; it is that males and females simply misunderstand each other (Tannen 1990: 363,368; Wood 2009: 7-8, 25). Arguments from theorists Cameron, Coates, Ostermann, West et al, and Harvey will also be explored when analyzing the gender distinctions evident in communication. Recognizing particular cues that concern a certain situation can be taught and may not be gender-dependent. There do seem to be appropriate ways to communicate based on what one is attempting to achieve in conversation – having nothing to do with gender. Examples in the transcription of the conversation of four females I observed show that females tend to speak in higher pitches. But other theories may suggest that women are merely socialized to communicate in this way – based upon culture, environment, context, etc.
Robin Lakoff suggests that women tend to use “tag questions,” which illustrate an uncertain and weaker picture of questioning compared to that of an authoritative and aggressive male form of questioning in communication (Lakoff 1975: 54-58). Lakoff also suggests that women use hedges and imperatives more often when communicating. For example, questions like “It is sort of cold (hedge). Wh...
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...lities in dating and comparing the study’s findings with the transcription will add value to what the study determines is “girl talk.” Like the study suggests, and what society generalizes as well, female communication differs systematically in many ways from that of male communication.
I also want to analyze other ways of communicating more effectively, ignoring the notion of gendered talk and what implications that may have – what happens when a male or female steps out of their schema and maybe communicates opposite of what is expected of him or her. My transcription contains cross-cultural communication as well, which may suggest other preconceived notions on female communication. Exploring female communication from other cultures and comparing it to our cultured communication may also suggest that communication differences are only situational or contextual.
“Men are from Mars, women are from Venus” as the famous saying of John Gray goes. It is believed men and women are nothing alike in almost every aspect. In Deborah Tannen’s essay “Gender in the classroom: Teacher’s Classroom Strategies Should Recognize that Men and Women Use Language Differently” she focused on how men and women differ when it comes to communicating, with emphasis on how it effects to how men and women behave in the classroom.
If a play is two or more characters conversing with one another on stage, a song lyric can be viewed as one side of a story of dialogue. It does not become any less conversational because of this, but is a different way to interpret a relationship. Deborah Tannen has achieved scholarly and public praise for her conclusions about how women and men differ in conversational styles. You Just Don’t Understand[6] clarifies stylistic differences in how the two sexes communicate with each other.
In the introduction of Deborah Tannen’s “Conversation Style: Talking on the Job”, she compares and contrasts the ways men and women communicate. This reminds me of what I tell people that are struggling in their relationships. Women and men express themselves differently. Women think, but men act. If you can’t wrap your head around this, being in a relationship with anyone is going to be hard. Yet, this is such a basic way of looking at this issue. Not only are the genders vastly different, but each person relates to the world around them in a certain way. He or she also needs to be related to in a specific way. Looking at personalities and personal histories can give a better look at the way we communicate with each other. Tannen examines
Something that has made an acceleration to several arguments is gender communication (Oluwagbemi-Jacob 225). The gender
Do men and women effectively communicate in the same way, or is it just a conversation of misunderstanding? There is constantly a new interest in whether men and women converse successfully. Professor and journalist, Deborah Tannen writes, “Sex, Lies, and Conversation: Why Is It So Hard for Men and Women to Talk to Each Other?” Tannen compares and contrasts all conversational styles, and explains how the expectation of dialogue affects how men and women converse. Tannen focuses on the subject of marriage and the imbalance of interest between male and female couples. The contrasting perspective however comes from, Deborah Cameron, author of, “What Language Barrier”. Cameron conveys that the stereotypes left upon male and female communication
The article “Women Talk Too Much” by Janet Homes is about whether or not women talk more than men; Holmes argued that males talk more than females in general, but the debate will continue in this topic for a long time. Holmes starts by asking the question “do women talk more that men?” the author shared sayings from different cultures about women talking too much, after that she go into her discussion. The purpose of the article was clearly to convince the reader that the title is 100% wrong. Homes uses statistics, researches and seminars to support her claim. The article was persuasive as she did a great job in presenting it very well, as she stated her claims early in the article.
Clive Thompson’s article “He and She: What’s the Real Difference?” poses the controversial question that various millennials have been debating for years: “What the heck is gender, anyway?” (365). For a large number of people, gender exists as a social divide solely based on whether an individual is anatomically and biologically male or female; nevertheless, there are those who argue that gender involves more than what anatomy and biology offer. Regardless of the perspective, gender affects how one behaves both privately and publicly, appears in social and private settings, communicates with others, and above all, uses language for literary purposes. Thompson’s writing observes the experiment of Bar-Ilan University’s professor, Moshe Koppel.
Communication between males and females has always been somewhat complicated. Because we are arguing that males and females have different cultures we wanted to take a look at what some of these differences might be. According to our research the inherent differences between male and female culture are the different roles that society holds for them and the ways these roles lead to different communication styles. The stereotypes that men and women grow up with affect the types of ways in which they communicate. We first wanted to take a look at how they specifically differ while men and women are arguing or having normal conversations. We also looked at the different types of networks that men and women share. These networks also differ and as do the reasonings for their formation. Although we do not think that men and women need to change their cultures to effectively communicate, we do think that better communication is possible. One of the researchers we took a look at was Deborah Tannen. According to Tannen the reason that men and women do not communicate well is that men and women use language differently. Women take the attitude that conversation is to explore solutions to common problems while men concern themselves more with getting information and hard data from conversation. Tannen states that what women look for in communication is human connection, while men consider status to be most important. They are looking for independence and are constantly looking for higher accomplishments. Intimacy threatens this independence, so men have a tendency to avoid it. One of the old sayings about women is that they talk more than men. It turns out that it is not necessarily true. Women seem to talk more in private conversations than do men. Women do not generally have a fear of intimacy and therefore are much more open with one another during private conversations. It is more difficult for women to use this type of communication style in the public arena. In that case it is men that do most of the talking. Tannen ultimately argues that men use communication as a weapon. They use long explanations to command attention from who it is they are speaking to. They use it to convey information and to ultimately gain agreement. Tannen suggests that through even simple conversation men are continually protecting their status. She sugg...
Further evidence of communicative differences exist between men and women in various other social settings as well. Consider, for example, those individuals employed in customer service-related Jobs. While in JC Penny, I noticed that female customer service representatives were more apt to offer immediate friendly assistance than the male reps. Men are not as cocky nor as confident in this sort of situation; their eyes tend to dart around the area of the store while the eyes of a women remain focused upon the eyes of the customer. The men seem to communicate with a lot less smiles. Apparently they have to get past a certain “ice-breaking'; point before they will feel comfortable with a genuine look of happiness.
Lieberman, Simma. “Differences in Male and Female Communication Styles” Simma Lieberman Associates (undated). Retrieved February 25, 2010<
Tannen, D. (2007). You Just Don’t Understand: Women and Men in Conversation. New York, NY: Harper.
There have been several discussions that address the differences between male and female language use. These discussions all began with Lakoff’s controversial essays from 1975 that first introduced the concept of “women’s language.” (O’Barr et al 1980) Since Lakoff’s essays, other linguists have sought to address the issue of how gender affects language. O’Barr and Atkins use Lakoff’s information ab...
A widely accepted myth that we all might hear everyday or might even think we experience is women do all the talking. In different languages around the world, there are many different sayings that say women talk too much. Myth 6, “Women Talk Too Much”, by Janet Holmes addresses the question if women are the ones who take up all the talking time or is this just a myth? I will address the main ideas and my reaction about Myth 6.
How does language affect our interaction with other genders? Language is the basis of all interaction. The language we use is essential to other’s perceptions of us. We instinctively know this, so we cater our language to suit how we want to be perceived by others. Language is not the only factor in perception though. Other’s interpretation of our language is as important an ingredient in their perception of us as the language we use is. Our perceptions of each other, more than anything else dictate our interactions with each other. The essential question is does interpretation of language vary between genders?
Wardhaugh states different social norms defining the standards of being men or women, which has a profound influence on the language behavior shown by different genders. In other words, both men and women should possess the ability to show either masculinity or feminity through the language they use. When this ability overlaps with the other gender, however, one might be considered as as outsider of their own gender. He then lists the main differences between males and femals with the connection with language: genetic differences, social differences (e.g. various roles people take within a certain society), and linguistic differences (e.g. speech style and word choice). Doing so, he gives readers an indepth idea about how gender differences link to various language behaviors. He further explains how these differences are possibly created and constructed in society. Wardhaugh also examines a few common gender stereotypes, such as women talk more than men, and proves most of the stereotypes are wrong.