Full Time Mom is a Full-Time Job
(Sacrifice)
My journey of being a full-time mom. When you become a mother there are certain things that you are constrained to, as far as working, mommy time, and furthering your education. I will show how I plan to do every one of these things while being a mother.
After I had my son I was on paid leave for three weeks. I dreaded going back to work, seeing that it is good to bond with your new-born baby for the first few months. Working is a part of living so to offer my baby the proper living necessities I had to work. While working all I could think about was, how my baby is doing without me. Along these lines, I would work forty hours a week. In my off time, I was a full-time mother.
As the months went by and my baby got older. I thought about furthering my education. Seeing how I was a full-time mom and I had a full-time job, it became less and less an option for me. I would have to quit my job to do so, and that’s not an option at all. So, I put off going to school. Well, as the season change and the job positions got smaller I realized that I
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would have to go back to school, to support a living for my child. So, I figured I’d cut back on hours at work while attending school. Just for a short while. I put off mommy time for a while.
But its fine, I get One hour of mommy time every day when my baby is taking a nap. I normally just surf the web during this time. If he wakes up and watches T.V. that’s a little more time added to the hour. In the future I will be able to balance and fit this time in more often.
The word sacrifice means so much more to me now. Yes it’s hard and a challenge as well but, so, worth it. A struggle for a while? Yes, but in the end it’s all worth it. So, cutting back on hours at work and mommy time allows me to further my education. When I finish school, I’ll only have to focus on being a mother and my career. Which is the American dream to me. This is the lifestyle of many homes in America. You go to work your kids go to school and on weekend’s you spend time with your family or call over the babysitter for mommy time. So, sacrifice are so worth
it.
You can work, but so much until it starts to affect things at home. I also believe if you want your child to have a good life then you need at least one parent at home not a babysitter or nanny. Also both parents need to equally contribute to the needs of each other and the child if both parents want to work full time
However, the demands put on parents by the workplace can make spending time with the family a difficult task. The technological revolution has made it possible for businesses to assign work after hours which could cut into family time. Balancing family and work is even more difficult for new parents. They must learn what it means to be a parent, maintain a healthy marriage, and continue to provide for their family. According to Kunz (2013), parents experience stress and exhaustion following the birth of their child. Kunz also mentions the responsibility parents have to aid in every aspect of their child’s development. Parents are being pulled in one direction by their infant and another by their boss. This strain can be especially difficult for new mothers who want to breastfeed. Exclusive breastfeeding is recommended for 6 months (who.int, 2017). If a woman returns to work quickly after giving birth, she will have difficulty breastfeeding and is at a greater risk for postpartum depression (cbsnews.com, 2017). The need for time to bond with an infant, encourage healthy development of the child, and to rest from child birth are all reasons why parental leave should be offered to all people. The need for time off after the birth of a child is not exclusive to one group. Parental leave should be offered to all types of families and business’ and the government should offer adequate assistance
Family leave has many benefits to children and the family. Rossin (2011) states, “[family] leave may affect the amount of time a child spends with his mother rather than in non-maternal care. [family] leave will also affect the quality of time the child spends with the mother, depending on changes to her stress level and her satisfaction with the trajectory of her career. The quantity and quality of time a mother spends with her child in his first year of life matter for the child's well-being”
With no pay and the risk of losing their jobs--if additional time is requested--parents return to work in as little as two weeks after the birth of a child. This results in the absence of one or both parents during the most crucial part of a child’s life—the first year of life. Ultimately, it is the children who will suffer. The events that take place in the early years of a child life, as well as the people that surround, will influence who they become. Children need love and guidance from their parents. Babies can learn so much, parents have the time to teach them and watch them grow. It is their duty as well as their rights as parents to enjoy the first moments of life with their children. Susan J. Douglas says, “The first five years of life are so crucial to cognitive and emotional development” (Douglas Par 8). Parents often send their babies to daycare at too young of an age because they are expected to return to work and have no other choice. Others quit their job because they do not want their babies to go to daycare. This creates a financial strain on families and has lasting effects on the newborn and other young children in the home. Sharon Lerner says, “Paid parental leave frees mothers and fathers from choosing between their careers and time with their infants” (Lerner 20). Paid family leave alleviates a great deal of stress for parents who are expecting. It makes starting a family less frightening because families have enough money and time to adjust with their new lives before returning to work. This makes workers less likely to call out of upon returning and more likely to be focused on the
Throughout high school and during my undergraduate studies, education was never a top priority for me. Only during the past two years, in the "real world", have I realized the importance of education. I look back at those years and wish I had done more and realized all the potential I had in my hands and not wasted so much time. During my undergraduate career my social activities consumed my life. My friends were not motivated to do well in school so I followed their lead. My grades were low, and I did not even care. After I graduated in 1997 with a Psychology B.A. and lost touch with my old friends and old ways, I have realized that I should have spent more time doing some soul searching and thinking what it was that I wanted to do with my life. I liked Psychology but what I really wanted to do was work with children more closely. I had spent my junior and senior years involved in internships at Head Start and at a High School in a Program for teenaged mothers. I loved my work there. At Head Start I was a Teacher Aid for the pre-school, teaching the children to read, numbers etc. And at the High School I counseled the teenaged mothers, took care of their kids while they went to school and after the school day I tutored them with their homework. After being out of school for a while, I started to miss that. The feeling that I was teaching something those kids, the feeling that I was making a difference. I was determined to find a job in education, with my background in Psychology, how hard could it be? I found work at a residential school for runaways and abused teenaged females. It was great! I was ready to go, I was going to change the world and change those girls lives. What I didn't realize is that will alone does not make me a teacher and that I needed training, a lot of training. I made a lot of mistakes in that job. I got discouraged and decided to forget about working with children, forget teaching and do something else that paid more. So, I got a job as a Secretary, I did that for about two years. Teaching, working with children was always on my mind.
The Family and Medical Aid Act (FLMA), of 1993, provides for 12 weeks of unpaid, job protected leave for certain specified events (8). Whilst one could refer to this as maternity or paternity leave if taken because of a pregnancy, this would not be strictly true. Where maternity and paternity leave are offered around the world, they are separate from any other leave due to medical or family reasons. The leave in the U.S. provided through the FLMA is also, as mentioned, unpaid. This creates a number of issues for the expectant family as, regardless of their job being safe for the time taken off, without the income it may be harder to look after the new born child as a couple of unpaid parents, than one parent not taking leave, or neither taking leave and relying on relatives to care for the child as much as possible.
Going back to college after you have been out of school for quite a few years, had three children, been married, and divorced is a lot harder than I ever imagined. It takes hard work, dedication, and missing out on the little things previously taken for granted. I miss taking naps the most. I believe if you can tough it out through the worst days, you can finish school and provide a better life for your children and yourself. You need a lot of willpower and a large sense of humor.
Going back to school at 30 is not the same as going back to school at 20, especially when you’re a single parent with an established career. Returning to school never left my mind throughout the years, I received my associates seven years ago and between then and now a lot had changed. So many questions I asked myself; do I have the time, who can help watch my daughter, can I juggle another load, etc. I answered every one of my questions; unfortunately I gave myself excuses instead. The decision going back to school was overwhelming because it was taking up another full time job; making it a priority and possibly putting in overtime to study and do homework.
To gain insight on the role of being a working mother I interviewed my mother, Jane Smith. Smith currently works forty, or more, hours a week as an office manager for a family business. Her job requires her to be at work from eight in the morning until five or six in the evening Monday through Friday. In addition to her role as an employee, she is currently married and is a mother of four daughters. These daughters are between the ages of thirteen and twenty-one; of these four daughters, three live at home with the family while the other is currently completing a study-abroad year in Germany. Smith has been a working mother for the past seven years, before which she worked as a stay-at-home parent. Her job requires her ...
I accepted returning to school as a challenge and promptly organized my life into what I thought would be a simplified, manageable existence. Like all of you, I restructured my home budget and explained to my husband that life as we knew it was over ... my roles as wife, nurse, employee, friend, student, cook, housekeeper, daughter, daughter-in-law, sister, sister-in-law, aunt, cousin, niece and granddaughter -- all at once -- became impossible. For once in my life, I was glad to NOT be a parent!
By that time, I was married with a two-year-old, so I did the only thing I knew how to do and I pushed off college again. Fast-forward five additional years and I was seriously looking to enroll in college this time, but now there were three kids and I quit my job (daycare was not a feasible option with three kids) to be a stay at home parent. By not bringing in any sort of income, college still wasn’t going to be an available option anytime soon. Once my youngest was three I decided to start looking at college once again. I knew it would need to be online since my family’s schedule does not allow for anything else. An article titled “College Students with Children are Common and Face Many Challenges in Completing Higher Education” states, “Being a parent substantially increases the likelihood of leaving college with no degree.” I heard about WGU Missouri (Western Governors University) and knew that was my ticket to receiving my teaching degree since they are completely online. Excited doesn’t even begin to describe how I felt knowing I would finally be able to start college. However, my excitement quickly turned to disappointment when I learned in order for me to be accepted I needed to have at least 12 credit hours already under my belt. At this point, I didn’t quite know what I would do. I also discovered my husband and I was expecting our fourth child. I knew college would need to be pushed
Becoming a mother has been the best part of my life. I became a mother at a very young age. I had no idea what to expect and was not in the least prepared for the journey that lie ahead. I have truly embraced motherhood and enjoy all the wonderful things it has taught me. While living through motherhood, I have found that it can teach you the most valuable lessons there are to learn. Being a mother has taught me how to have patience. I have also learned that being a mother takes a lot on mental and physical strength. My children have been the best to teach me how to juggle many tasks at once. They have made me strong. Even through some unexpected turns, I have learned how to get through hard times and really learn what it means to never give up. My children are my biggest blessing, and I hope they will learn valuable lessons through me. The skills I have learned from being a mother have helped me in my college journey.
Mothers understand how precious time is with their children; it’s time they can’t get back, so it’s important to be there for all those precious moments. When mothers are able to stay home with their children because their husbands are able to support the family it’s one of the greatest sacrifices to make for their children because mothers understand the many different struggles of two-career and one-career families.
As a single mother with 6 children, my mother has tried her best to keep my sisters and I content. Although my she has done everything in her power to make my sisters and I happy, I don't want my children or anyone else for that matter to go through the same conditions that I went through. I want to have a successful life or career so I can thoroughly provide for my family and give them the contentment that they deserve. It is my mother’s actions that have made me come to the realization that anything is genuinely possible if you have the ambition and desire to do it. It is because of my mother that I, Jalyssa Smith, want to major in biology and become a pediatrician.
"How To Decide Whether To Be A Stay At Home Mom or Working Mom." Cash money life: Personal Finance And Career. Ed. Ryan Guina. N.p., n.d. Web. 9 Dec. 2013.