Definition Essay On Self Compassion

Compassion is the ability for a person to recognize another person’s suffering; it also involves being touched by their torment and your heart responding to their agony. Showing compassion to someone includes being a benevolent, understanding peer that shows kindness towards the distressed instead of judging them. Compassion is the understanding that pain, sorrow, and disappointment is part of life and everyone goes through it. Self- compassion is the act of being kind towards yourself in sorrow and trying to help and comfort yourself instead of brushing it off. According to Dr. Kristin Neff self-compassion has three important elements: self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness. Self-kindness is when you realize that you are hurting instead

of overlooking it and being too hard on ourselves. Common humanity is the capability to comprehend that everyone in the world suffers and you are not alone. Mindfulness is when you address your problems overlooking them. Self-esteem is the feeling of low worthless and hating ourselves, whereas, self-compassion is addressing the hardships and trying to work through it. Being unmotivated is when you’re a “couch potato” and indulging in self-agony instead of trying to help yourself reach a healthy and happy place.
Two and a half years ago my mother and brother brought home a Morkie, Maltese Yorkshire Terrier, for me.

The puppy was two point nine pounds and the cutest, softest, smallest puppy I’ve ever seen. I named him Oreo because he was black on his back and had a white stomach and legs. Oreo isn’t your average lap dog. He has very high separation anxiety. We’ve tried multiple ways to help him including a dog trainer making a house call, private lessons with the trainer, a calming supplement, and even a prescription dose of Prozac. Whenever anyone leaves the house he starts crying and bites the person, trying to get them to stay. He is very insecure and when he sees often bullies our other dog when we give him attention. Oreo barks at every dog, even animals on the television. During rainstorms Oreo shakes uncontrollably and is terrified. If you startle him when he’s sleeping he will wake up scared and attack. He’s nipped at all of us in the house. One day when he was sleeping I got too close to him and he bit my lip. Another time when my mother was cuddling with him Oreo snapped and bit my mom’s cheek. On Monday morning he bit her face and she went to the emergency room and needed five stitches. We have to put him down next Wednesday, the day before

Thanksgiving.
As the criticizer, the dog should definitely be put down because he is a danger to anyone that comes in contact with him. He is mentally unstable and will snap at any moment. The dog could cause serious damage to a person and that could result in an ugly lawsuit. I am the criticized. I love Oreo more than anything in the world. I know everyone loves their dog, but I have a deeper more special connection with him. I got him at a time that I was very depressed and suffering from an exercise addiction. I was running eighteen miles a day or using a weighted hula hoop for multiple hours. Oreo is my baby and my responsibility. I was so depressed that I isolated myself from everyone and felt like I had no need to live. Oreo gave me a reason to wake up and get out of bed in the morning. If I left he wouldn’t be taken care of and would miss me, his mommy. Putting him down is the hardest thing that has come up in my life. A part of me is dying on the inside. I love him so much and can’t image life without his little pitter patter. I feel like I let him down and was lazy and didn’t help him get healthier. I am wondering if I’m being punished. I don’t see how taking away my baby is the right move. As the compassionate observer I can see how much she is suffering. The family and Oreo were both blessed to have had two wonderful years together. If Oreo ended up with a different family he might have been treated badly and abused. The other people may not have realized how mentally ill and scared he is. Although it will hurt her the experience has left several happy memories.
I really did not feel like writing this paper, but I knew I had to. I have been crying nonstop for the last two days and am a mess both emotionally and physically. Reading Dr. Kristin Neff’s ideas of self-compassion have helped me. I have learned that it is okay to grieve and that right now I need to take care of myself. She taught me that I can’t just ignore the feelings and emotions, but on the other side I can’t believe that I am the only human being in the world to have suffered this kind of dilemma. Also, I can’t self-indulge and “reward” myself instead of trying to become happy again. During the next few days I have to decide what I want to do with Oreo. I am leaning towards burying him at a pet cemetery, Noah’s garden, and having a small funeral. Overall, writing this paper helped me gather my feelings and gave me a time to really concentrate on something and not cry.