Aristotelian and Epictetus: On External Things

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In the world there are two distinct types of things. There are things that exist external to us, such as one's reputation or a relationship. We do not have direct control over these things since they exist outside of us. Then there are internal things that we do have control over, like out desires, or things we dislike. The internal things can be controlled, while the external can be harder to control. Some philosophers even believe that the external things cannot be controlled, and attempting to control them will just bring unhappiness.
The Stoic philosopher Epictetus is one such philosopher. In The Enchiridion he outlined how to live a good life as a stoic. Anything that is not one's own action is out of their control and should be ignored. He lists "Body, property, reputation, and command" as examples.1 He claims they are weak, and do not belong to us. Trying to control them will lead to unhappiness. On the other hand, he believes if you recognize that external things belonging to others, and internal things as yours you will be much better off.2 To Epictetus, proper way to live is to let things come to you, while being reserved. To illustrate this, he uses the example of a dinner party, where you should not reach across the table and take things. Instead you wait till they come to you.3
Obviously not everyone thinks this way. While Epictetus thinks the best life, is an extremely reserved one, Aristotle says the most virtuous life is a mean between the extremes. For example, the virtue of courage is the mean between rashness, and cowardice.4 Aristotle and Epictetus would disagree, because from an Aristotelian viewpoint Epictetus' ideas do not lead to virtue. For Aristotle virtue is like an instrument that ...

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.... in Addition, his claim that it is impossible to control things outside one's actions was incorrect. it would not be immediate, but they both could have put the effort in, to change the circumstances over time. Marcher had all the opportunity to change things, and Maria through her life likely could have done the same. Had they done this both of them would have had more happiness in their lives.
Abandoning external things, is an extreme position. When faced with something extreme the best strategy is find the less extreme behavior. The Aristotelian concept of a mean between extremes gives an exceptional guideline in how to act. Both Marcher and Maria had extreme behavior in regard to dealing with external things. Their deficiency in controlling them led to their lives being less fulfilling. Ideally they could have fixed this by moving towards the center.

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