Stress And Strain In Relationships

With any relationship there are hardships that cause stress and strains between a couple. Some of these hardships are done on intentionally, while others are unintentional. The common stresses and strains seen in romantic relationships include: ostracism, hurt feelings, jealousy, lying, and betrayal. These all take a toll on a relationship and damages the foundation the couple has built. It causes distrust and suspicion between two people, but increases an individuals loss of self-worth and feeling of control. Although these hurt a relationship, people have the option to forgive their partner of their misbehavior which could ultimately make their relationship stronger and bring them closer together. However, when the stresses and strains are

Although the level of pain people feel differs from every individual; their confidence, self-esteem, and personal experiences all have an influence on how they handle and feel about the situation. Hurt feelings have a very similar affect to real pain and as relational devaluation occurs in a person, the more hurt that person is than one who has a lower level of relational devaluation. The victim feels that they are in more situations where they describe their “hurt feelings as painful and distressing” and it has “long-term effects on relationships and on victims’ self-esteem” (Feeney, 2004). This corresponds with anxious individuals who were observed in the Attachment Anxiety and Reactions to Relationship Treat study. It was predicted, and proven, “that anxious individuals would feel more hurt by their partner and try to repair closeness by strategically expressingtheir hurt feelings to induce guilt in their partner” (Overall, Girme, Lemay Jr., & Hammond, 2014). Self-esteem levels also have an effect on how people handle their hurt feelings and how they let their feelings get the best of

“The three feelings that define jealousy best are hurt, anger, and fear” (Miller, 2015). These feelings begin because one may feel that they have a romantic rival who could be a threat to the relationship. However, there are two ways that someone could respond to feelings of jealousy. First is reactive jealousy; which occurs when there is a threat to the relationship and it poses genuine danger. Jealousy “acts as a motivational mechanism with behavioral output aimed at blocking infidelity and abandonment” (Kennair, Nordeide, Andreassen, Stronen, & Pallensen, 2011). Suspicious jealousy is labeled as the second way to react to jealousy; one partner has not done anything to trouble to the relationship, but the other partner believes they have. These two types of jealousy are not that much different from each other than they may seem; but can be detrimental to a relationship. The way one person may view reactive jealousy could mean nothing to the other, but for another couple it could be the start of suspicious jealousy. Such example would be lingering on a person walking by: one partner may view it as nothing but people watching, but another may view it as a threat. Jealousy, overall, could be a threat to any relationship. The person who is jealous may always seem on edge and possibly always question what their partner is doing. While the other partner will be constantly overwhelmed