By now, you should have read our blog Branding Habits - Perfection vs. Excellence. If you haven’t, we encourage you to read that blog. It will help you to better identify the pitfalls of perfection and to understand how those pitfalls can ruin your personal brand and a brand’s identity.
Often, a perfectionist is an isolationist because while they may surround themselves with others, those others may not be drawn to them. They are not better than others, but they give others the impression they are better. A perfectionist also creates barriers that set up irrelevant standards others cannot reach or that other people do not care to reach.
When you create barriers, it’s kind of like sitting in the car with the engine running but never opening
…show more content…
Often, just as a perfectionist is an isolationists, bullies are also often isolationists. They may have their few friends, but they both create barriers that cause other people either not to be able to get close to them or that makes people not want to be around them.
Also consider that just as a perfectionist is judgmental, a bully is judgmental. A bully is a bully for the same reasons a perfectionist is a perfectionist. They both create barriers by choosing victims, those are people they isolate themselves from in order to make themselves seem better. The difference here is that while a childhood bully from a broken home might victimize a classmate from a home with both parents, a perfectionist might victimize their spouse by being a workaholic.
Identifying the perils of perfection is important because a perfectionist is not only judgmental toward others, but they are also judgmental toward themselves. That’s why both a bully and a perfectionist need to isolate themselves from others by making those others either feel less or by making them not want to be around them. The closer they allow others to get to them, the more they fear those others will recognize the frailties inside of
There are bullies everywhere you go some noticeable and others not at all, you may not recognize a bully because they come in many different forms. The abusiveness of bullies’ is usually deliberate and not accidental. There are bullies at work, online, in the public and mostly school. So who is a bully? A bully is a person that causes emotional, psychological, or physical harm by using two different types of attacks. The first type being direct attacks, this consists of threatening, teasing, taunting, name calling, stealing, damaging of belongings, and hitting. Studies say that this type of attack is more common between males. “While both boys and girls say others bully them by making fun of the way they look or talk, boys are more likely to report being hit, slapped, or pushed”( Nansel, Overpeck, Pilla, Ruan, Simons-Morton, Scheidt 2001). The other type of attacks are indirect, they are spreading of rumors and encouraging others to reject someone else. Studies say that this type of attack is more common between females. “Teenage girls are more often the targets of rumors and sexual comments” ( Nansel, Overpeck, Pilla, Ruan, Simons-Morton, Scheidt 2001). Bullies usually target people who are different, it may be physical differences or even intelligence, and also they tend to target people who won’t retaliate back. They usually harass the person by attacking at there differences and imperfections. So a bully is someone who causes harm to others over and over again.
Bullies often have an agenda that leads them to bully. A bully tries to “shame and intimidate their victims and make them feel inadequate” (Rosenthal 16). The reasoning behind this is that children often learn their habits from parents if they use aggressive language or have an aggressive behavior. Often children do not have a mother or father figure to guide them or teach them how to behave properly and this affects them in the long run. More bullies than non-bullies live without two biological parents; some live with extended family or foster families. Many do not receive a lot attention at home causing anger in some children. Some kids live in bad areas and are used to violence around them and use this against other children, leading to guns in school. Bullies often deliberately go out of their way to put others down and usually to make themselves feel better for not getting what they want at home. Sometimes it’s the complete opposite, and children get whatever they want from their parents and they feel that they can make fun of others inferior to them. Just like popular girls or boys that feel it is ok to make fun of students that aren’t popular. Many bullies were once a victim either at home from family, or at school from other classmates. The ...
Quinn was helping Steve fight Ultron by teleporting back and forth until she could hit the few bots that came, out of the quick moving train. It wasn't until Steve was knocked down when Pietro had ran into the train hitting Ultron and Wanda appeared after. Wanda had used her powers holding up a gate so Ultron could not get Quinn, Steve, or Pietro. One of the bots had knocked Quinn down, so she was on the floor in between seats when Pietro and Wanda had appeared. "Please. Don't do this." Ultron pleaded as he realized that the twins were now against him. "What choice do we have." Wanda said, and Quinn felt a bit more safe when she realized Pietro and Wanda were there now on her side. Ultron sent a blast to Pietro, which he blocked, shattering
The main purpose of this research is to have a better understanding of perfectionism and depression in adults. Perfectionism is a personality trait and perfectionist individuals are individuals who expect high standards of performance. Perfectionism has been identified as a risk factor for major depressive disorder (MDD). In this study, it is examined if outcome expectancy involved in perfectionist individuals differs for individuals with depression compared to non-depressed individuals. To conduct this research 49 depressed and 42 non-depressed individuals participated and to measure the severity of perfectionism and depression a self-report instrument was used. Individuals with depression report higher negative and lower positive outcome
Bullies like to interact with people who have the same issues as them, because they don’t have to deal with competition. Bullies can be independent, but mostly bullies like to have admirers encouraging their ruthless behavior. When adult cliques bully other people, they usually focus on people who are possible rivals. They do not like to see people’s full potential, because bullies can tell that it can outshine their position in their workplace (“Sanctuary for the Abused”). Troubled adults and children have problems within themselves that they cannot fix, so they tend to take their anger out on people (“Bullying: Characteristics and Interventions”). They like to damage people’s confidence, because they know they do not have good self-esteem. Also, dictators are very reliant on others, because they want people to do their dirty work. When two dictators come together, they can possibly go to war as allies together and make horrific changes in their
In the article “Other-oriented Perfectionism Vs. Self-oriented Perfectionism” by James Anderson, he states, “Self-oriented perfectionists have exceedingly high personal standards, strive for perfection and expect themselves to be perfect.” Anderson, James. "Other-oriented Perfectionism Vs. Self-oriented Perfectionism." ReliaWire, 14 May 2015. http://reliawire.com/other-oriented-perfectionism-vs-self-oriented-perfectionism/ This type of perfectionist can cause mental health problems in people by having them struggle to reach the standards said in the above quote. One thing that one with self oriented perfection might struggle with is low self esteem because of their high standards. Another example of the different types of perfection would be Socially Prescribed perfection. “…believe that others hold unrealistic expectations for their behavior (and that they can't live up to this); experience external pressure to be perfect, believe others evaluate them critically.” Pychyl, Timothy A. “What Flavor of Perfectionist Are You? It Matters!” Psychology Today, Sussex Publishers, 30 Apr. 2008, www.psychologytoday.com/blog/dont-delay/200804/what-flavor-perfectionist-are-you-it-matters. For one to believe that others want them to accomplish unrealistic standards can really affect the way someone feels about oneself. For some it might make one feel like one is unable to accomplish anything and
Perfectionism has two aspects. First, you have a tendency to have expectations about yourself, others, and life that are unrealistically high. When anything falls short, you become disappointed and/or critical. Second, you tend to be overconcerned with small flaws and mistakes in yourself or your accomplishments. In focusing on what's wrong, you tend to discount and ignore what's right.
What makes a bully? Bullies are usually people who show aggressive behavior, and they often intimidate others who in their mind do not “fit in.” Kids who are gay, transgender, overweight, or maybe even kids who come from a completely different ethnic group are often bullied. But, what is a bully’s motivation? Most kids bully because they are insecure. Bullying is their way of managing their emotions. Kids may lack attention from their families at home, and by bullying they draw attention to themselves. Bullies also believe that bullying will solve their social problems. By picking on poor, little, nerdy Betty, they
Silverman, L.K. (I 99 5). Perfectionism. Paper discussed at the 1 1 th World Conference on Gifted and Talented Children, Honk Kong.
A bully is someone who picks on other people, because they think it is the way to solve their problems. There are many types of bullying, there is physical, verbal, and mental. Children that are ages five through eleven began using verbal abuse and some even use physical abuse (Garrett 33). People estimated that one hundred and sixty thousand students miss school every day, and twenty-eight million missed school days per year, due to fear of being bullied (Garrett 36). Six million boys and four million girls are involved in fights from being bullied or bullying others (Garrett 33). Also, there is an estimate that over five hundred and twenty-five thousand people are bullies in America (Garrett 35). “Freshman, particularly are the victims of bullies in high school, especially if they are small and smart” (Garrett 31-32). Many people are bullied because of the way they look, or the way they act.“ Children from violent homes are three or four times more likely to become a bully” (Garrett 30). Some bullies may make fun of people because they were made fun of, beaten, or unwanted as they grew up. Most children become bullies to gain power (Verial). Bullies do what they do so they “feel competent, successful, to control someone else, to get some relief from their own feelings of powerlessness” (Garrett 72).When children grow up they may become bullies, because of the abusive environment they were raised in by their parents.
Bullies appear in all shapes and sizes. There is not a specific physical trait that they all carry. Although, mentally and emotionally bullies might be extremely similar. Most of the time, there is some type of deep insecurity within the bully that causes them to push it onto another person. A child or teen that does bully others are known to also be engaged in other various harmful activities. They are more likely to use drugs or alcohol and tend to engage in sexual activities earlier than the norm. A bully can be someone that is popular and has a high social status. This causes them to want to establish dominance and a position above everyone else. For example, the movie Mean Girls deals with this type of conflict. A character in this movie named Regina George made a "Burn Book" to establish her dominance. This book showcased gossip and rumors about students and teachers who attended her high school. A bully could also be someone who is isolated and deals with a great amount of low self-esteem. This still cau...
But then her eyes sought Aylmer’s face with trouble and anxiety. She then said to him ‘Dearest Aylmer, I’m dying,’ and she died.” (Hawthorne 324). Perfectionism is something everyone should try to avoid. It can never bring comfort, instead it adds to the
We often think that our main goals are linked to perfection, however, we are unaware of the devastating effect this unattainable concept has on our outlook on life when we cannot achieve it. Though the textbook definition of perfection is, “the quality or condition of being perfect and without flaws”, it is a vice that harbors many doubts and insecurities and holds us back from things we want to do for fear of not being good. Perfection is a concept that cannot be achieved as it does not exist.
Perfectionism of the mind is a goal rationalists try to strive for. Perhaps the main problem with this concept is that it promotes over achievement on everything we do. For many...
A bully can be defined in several ways and this term is sometimes exaggerated. However, according to the Miriam-Webster Dictionary, a bully is defined as “one habitually cruel to others who are weaker” and bullying is defined as “to cause (someone) to do something by making threats or insults or by using force”. These are the formal definitions of the term, but the def...