What Do We Owe Our Parents?

780 Words2 Pages

Jane English, a philosophy professor at the University of North Carolina argues that grown children have no filial obligations to their parents. Jane English believes that there are two relationships based on reciprocal favors and relationships of friendship. Both relationships involve duties, but English argues that friendship and its duties should be governing the relationship of grown children and their parents. In other words, the relationship between a grown child and their parents should model on a friendship-type relationship. When asked the question "What do grown children owe their parents?" English's response is "nothing." Her position held is that it is misleading to describe them as things "owed" specifically because parents make voluntary sacrifices, rather than generate debts to be repaid, they create love or friendship. To further understand how these relationships work English explains some different instances for each relationship.

Aspect one, Favors Create Debts is a suggestion to perform equal, reciprocal, canceling sacrifices. English feels that a person who performs a "favor" expects a mutual gain from their acquaintance. Many times it is difficult to distinguish between "favors" and "non favors" because friends tend to do favors for each other, and those who exchange favors tend to become friends. A way to test this is to ask what someone's motivation is. Are they establishing a relationship to be nice, or because he/she did me a favor? Consider the example on page 692 where Max, a new neighbor, asks Nina to collect his mail while he is on vacation. Nina agrees and did Max a favor. The metaphor of Max's "owing" Nina is appropriate. Once Max performs one act of similar nature for Nina, their obligations ...

... middle of paper ...

...y are ungrateful and spoiled.

As someone who is semi-spoiled and is able to get mostly what I want and need, I feel it is imperative that I show my parents that I appreciate all that they can and try to do for me. I am grateful for being taken care of and I believe it is selfish to not want to give parents anything in return. When I am asked the question "What do grown children owe their parents?" my response is everything under the sun for all the love, care, and support I have received from my parents. Although answers may differ from person to person depending on how much of a relationship they have with their parents, in the end your parents gave you life and that is the biggest gift anyone can receive. The experience to live even if your life has not been of "high-quality" is an experience I love and continue to love, in which I have my parents to thank.

Open Document