There is much emphasis on being independent and doing things for yourself in society that people are turning cold and are merely looking out for themselves. It is getting to the point that a husband or wife can not really be relied on because almost half of all marriages end in divorce. Maybe looking out for one's self is the logical response, since that is the only person one can rely on. What is it that makes a person independent? Does being independent mean being alone, being domineering towards others, being excessively proud, or being egotistical? Can someone be married and friendly to others and still be truly independent?
Margaret Laurence's novel The Stone Angel shows that true independence need neither begin at a young age nor end at a certain point. This is clearly portrayed by the main character Hagar Shipley, who at the age of ninety is still a woman who at least tried to make her own decisions, despite obvious age related limitations. Being too independent can affect personal relationships, yet on the other end of the spectrum, being too dependent on other people could cause others to view you as a burden. So what is the happy medium here and how can both extremes be avoided?
Hagar Shipley is an independent woman, but it is because she has to be or because she wants to be? Her independence began at a young age, since she had no mother in her childhood to set examples for her, nor a mother to go to for advice. Her Auntie Doll was her only possible female role model in her life, but Hagar did not have much appreciation or respect for her. It seemed as though she was moving in on her mother's territory. Without a mother figure in her developing years, Hagar had to learn things for herself when it was not appropriate to talk about something with her father; this caused her to make more mistakes along the way. She holds a strong resentment towards other women, especially her mother. Hagar believes her mother was weak for dying during childbirth, in reality it was a situation entirely out of anyone's control. Considering the fact that she was lacking a birth mother, her personality developed in a more rugged way, rougher around the edges then generally expected. It also reflects her resentment towards women in general, and causes her to avoid dependence on others.
Autonomy is the basis of authenticity allowing individuals the ability to make choices that directly reflect their own values. The application of these values to one's decisions can result in both positive and negative outcomes. Hedonism claims that happiness is the only thing that carries value to life. All other things (e.g. autonomy) work in accordance to improve our lives only to the extent that they make one happier (Shafer-Landau 39).
When you move into your own apartment you are an independant adult. (no need to rely on others)
Thus, personal autonomy can be practiced when it comes to work. A person does not have to be fully on his own to be an individual. In both the child and work example, the child and workers are supported. Although they are left to do things on their own, the mother and the monk are there when help is required. Works Cited Lee, D. (1959).
As a child, I was oblivious to why being independent was so important. I had never been exposed to a Pakistani woman who had a stable income and could support herself. I assumed I would eventually be an ordinary housewife like every other Pakistani woman I had seen.
Once upon a time marriage was a requirement of society and a value to many women who wanted a stable life. It stand as a commitment to their husband and to God. It remain a way to start a proper family in the eyes the Lord. It was what many mothers and daughters dreamed of. Now that, many generations have passed many people believe marriage is not valued and Divorce rates are higher than ever. Religion has also become optional and there’re many different religions to choose from. Cohabitation has also reigned over society one doesn’t need to wait till marriage. Now you are able to move in with the person you love at any point in life. Marriage had started as a first option to many but it has become the last. There are still reasons why marriage
Slave marriages among other slaves and slave owners have always placed a social burden on the plantations and the government of the United States. What were the social issues that occurred as slaves had relations with other slaves or their masters? Government scandals, black salve owners, and law changes have all came about as part of the social discrepancies that came along with slave relations. Biographies of William Ellison, the first African American slave owner, will be scrutinized to see the social implications of a slave master owning slaves of the same ethnicity. Personal Journals written about the Thomas Jefferson and Sally Heming's case will be analyzed to see the government scandal placed on Jefferson’s slave relations. These social issues helped play out the course of slavery in the United States of America.
We have been socialized to believe that caring for an elderly relative or person is a burden. The term “burden,” which is used by many elderly members of society, further advances the notion that to care for others, even others in one’s family causes undo stress upon the caregivers. If a person is a burden on somebody, then they cannot be successfully achieving goals. The concept of achievement is represented by striving towards the American dream. Independence is an indirect reward of a lifetime of working towards the status that has been dictated as normal to us by our culture...
Just from this short quote, one can see the independence she wanted the women in her stories to feel without having a man in their lives.
Respecting autonomy means the individuals being served are provided with as much independence as possible. For example, a high functioning teenage with ASD is allowed to self-manage their behaviours with the addition of daily checks. This provides the teenager
Being locked into this cave caused a distorted view of the society around her and those closest to her. This was apparent when she reflected on Regina Weese who was buried in the same cemetery as her mother. Hagar viewed Regina’s death with no sympathy and simply believed that it was her own damn fault; “And yet I always felt she had only herself to blame, for she was a flimsy, gutless creature, bland as egg custard.” (Laurence 4). This shows that whatever Hagar believed that Regina did or did not do before she died made Hagar view her negatively instead of considering the people around Regina that would be impacted by her death. Next, the ignorance of Hagar was probably the most visible between her relationship with John and Marvin as she always viewed John as her pure son instead of Bram’s; “I always thought John took after the Curries… I hadn’t any doubt of it, until he came back here and started living like a hobo.” (Laurence 202). By the end of Hagar’s life, she recognized her ignorance by telling Marvin that “You’ve not been cranky, Marvin. You’ve been good to me, always. A better son than John.” (Laurence 304). Clearly, Hagar was blind to Marvin constantly trying to take care of Hagar when she just saw it as being needy and after her money when in fact Marvin and Doris sacrificed much of their life to keep Hagar safe which she finally
Like many other words, independence can mean many different things to different people. For some, independence may be a feeling. Maybe you feel independent when you set up your own doctor or dentist appointment. For others, independence may be a lifestyle change. Trapped in a home where you didn’t feel welcome, and then you move out into your own apartment. I believe that independence is the act of striking
...tivities that I chose to do, I slowly began to fall into place, on my own. I believe that its very important for parents to be open minded when it comes to gender. Looking back at my own situation, my parents followed the norms in the beginning and forced me into a realization that I wasn’t ready for. Therefore, as a young child, I did the only thing I could and rebelled. However, as they began to change and let me make my own decisions I got right back on track. I grew into a woman, and the previous experience helped me become my own person. Because of my father, I was determined to be my own individual, an independent and powerful woman. That was my number one priority growing up and I contribute a lot of my later success to that previous attitude.
is the most usual in which a man and a woman unite themselves in the
When we think of marriage, the first thing that comes to mind is having a lasting relationship. Marriage is a commitment of two people to one another and to each other?s family, bonded by holy matrimony. When a couple plans to marry, they think of raising a family together, dedicating their life to each other. That?s the circle of life--our natural instinct to live and produce children and have those children demonstrate your own good morals. I have never been married; but I don?t understand why when two people get married and vow to be together for richer and poorer, better or worse, decide to just forget about that commitment. A marriage should be the most important decision a person makes in his or her life.
The fourth and final step of the marriage process is to become one flesh. According to free dictionary.com, become means “to grow or come to be,” or “to be appropriate or suitable; to develop or grow into; to be appropriate; befit.” Becoming is a process that takes time and work. Tim Keller states that in order to call a union marriage, “sex is understood as both a sign of that personal, legal union and a means to accomplish it. The Bible says don’t unite with someone physically unless you are also willing to unite with the person emotionally, personally, socially, economically, and legally. Don’t become physically naked and vulnerable to the another person without becoming vulnerable in every other way, because you have given up your freedom and bound yourself in marriage.” (Keller pg. 215) God’s design is supposed to occur on the wedding night as they complete their marriage vows by having sex. It is clear that “they will become one flesh” is a indirect term for sex but it is also more than sex. The become one is to be on the same page, mind and accord. It is correct to compare it to one brain, making one decision and taking one action. Together one path, and they share one authority, one heart, one body, one mind, one thought, one church, and one God. The spouses become one flesh in every sense of the word. All these areas of oneness are important because division in any of them will cause them to stumble.