Robin Thicke Blurred Lines

In the song “Blurred Lines” by Robin Thicke, there is a particular verse in which Robin says “I know you want it but you're a good girl, the way you grab me you must want to get nasty, go ahead get at me…” These few lines in his song begin to depict how a woman’s sexual desire plays into her identity. Thicke illustrates how a woman could be labeled “good” or “bad” depending on how she chooses to act upon her sexual needs. A “good” girl is one that would not pounce upon her sexual desires, and instead she would come off as morally oriented; this girl would act as if her libido is nonexistent. In contrast, a “bad” girl does act on her sexual pleasure and chooses to acknowledge what she wants and what will satisfy her most sexually aligned needs.

This opens the door for the question of “Who exactly set these two categories between a ‘bad’ and ‘good’ girl, and do they hold truth?” Thicke then continues to tell this girl to “get at him” which then makes it socially acceptable for the girl to act upon her desires because she is doing it to please a man.

As highlighted in this song, American society feels the need to police women’s sexual desires and silence them, only until they are associated with fulfilling a man’s libido. Throughout adolescence, the social construction of desire molds a woman’s expected behavior. This normalized behavior is then carried into adulthood. A woman who seeks out to focus her attention and energy into her own sexual desire, is considered a taboo within this western notion. The chains placed on women’s desire is due to the heteronormative environment that we live in. This idea of policing women is not only viewed within western society but, transnationally as well. Women are open to criticism due to the expression of their sexuality (Shah). Women are influenced to believe that complying to a man in any shape or form is the societal norm, even when we are talking about something as intimate as their own erotic

pleasure. We view female sexuality as something that can unknowably be dismissed.
In Deborah Tolman’s book Dilemmas of Desire: Teenage Girls Talk about Sexuality, Tolman is also able to share accounts in her life which have reflected the views of how society patronizes a woman’s sexuality. “A man I had not met before began bragging about how his teenage son showed every sign of being a ‘ladies man’…how his boy was so successful at playing the field…Later that evening, this same man spoke about his fifteen-year-old daughter. A different picture of the terrain of adolescent sexuality came to the fore.” (Tolman, 4) The account that Tolman had with this man illustrates the patriarchal culture that exists, and in particular the double standards that exist between male and female sexuality. There are different expectations depending on whether you are a female or a male, females are expected to be in a committed relationship that comes along with an emotional commitment, as opposed to men who are capable of having various sexual partners without facing judgment by their community.The traditional idea of being a man includes illustrating that they are capable of acting upon their sexual desires, while as for females as explained by Tolman an entirely different spectrum is put into play; this man’s daughter is not and will not be celebrated if she acts upon her sexual needs in the same way his son appears to act. Western society is sought out to assume that only normal males but not females have “raging hormones”; “normal girls” are set out to want an emotional connection and relationship. It appears as though the views on sexuality have been set up for us since we were kids. As illustrated above in Tolman’s account, adolescent boys are praised when they bring home a girlfriend, yet young girls are told that they could not have a boyfriend until they became young women. These ideas continue on into young adulthood. As teenagers, girls are wired to believe that they must remain pure in order to be a “good girl”, and if they dare to act on their sexual desires, they will be shamed by society. The means of interpreting a girl’s want for an emotional connection with their sexual desire is what desexualizes girls. It is evident that two binary gender norms are set up; males must act on their sexual desire or face being questioned of their masculinity, while females must only long for a connection and not pounce on their sexual desire, for they will risk being labeled as a “lesser” woman. Society has easily categorized how one should act upon their sexual desires. It is clear that there exist different ideas based upon one’s gender.