People have many expectations they are expected to fulfill by a lot of different people, but these standards are not always followed. People act as they want rather than by the principles set by others by doing so they are discovering their own identity. Identities define what kind of person we are to other people. Others can learn about one another by studying how someone performs. Performance is exemplified through our actions. The way we present our self to others is by performing to their expectations or going against them. If people defy expectation and do as they want they are creating their own unique identity. In “Selections from Hard to Get: Twenty-Something Women and the Paradox of Sexual Freedom,” Leslie Bell talks about three young …show more content…
There are expectations from society, friends, and parents. Sometimes we go against what is anticipated and do our own thing. In Leslie Bell’s, “Selections from Hard to Get,” a young woman Jayanthi goes against the expectations of others and goes out to discover herself. Bell writes, “There is also appeal in the drama and excitement of having a crazy story to tell and creating a history for oneself, especially if one’s history previously has been defined by others’ expectations of what a woman should be and do,” (Bell 31). When Bell talks about “creating a history for oneself” it implies that Jayanthi is not following the footsteps of her ancestors and she is going against her parents’ expectations for her. By doing this she is creating her own identity with adventurous stories to tell others unlike her ancestors who followed tradition. Jayanthi is distinguishing herself from her family by doing her own thing. She will be remembered differently than all the women in her family that came before her because she is taking a different path and making her own choices. This relates to Shannon Faulkner who applies to a male only academy in, “The Naked Citadel,” by Susan Faludi. She is finding herself by going against society and doing what she wants. She is proving her strength and setting a precedent for all those who come after her. Faludi writes, “But the administration made passing the fitness test a requirement for graduation …show more content…
When our performance changes to match our environment to give up our individuality and blend with the atmosphere. In Faludi’s story she talks about how the young men attending the Citadel act the same and follow traditions passed down by older cadets. Faludi writes, “And, anyway, after freshman year the men no longer get their head shaved,” (Faludi 75). When Faludi states “no longer get their head shaved” it implies that every freshman cadet has to shave their head and in do so they are performing to expectation. The men do not question what they are told to do, by doing this they give up their identity and blend with everyone around them. The Citadel does not have expectations of rebellion from these men, similar to how Bell does not speak of expectations from men in her essay. Bell only makes references to the expectations of women, not men. She writes, “They have more freedom than women a few generations ago would have imagined possible,” (Bell 26). When Bell writes “more freedom,” it implies that even though women have freedom now they still have expectations just fewer than those of women in earlier generations. However, she never states the limitations of men. They have no expectations. Through both the works of Bell and Faludi it is shown that where women are restricted from many things, men just conform to society sacrificing their
The exterior influences of society affect a woman’s autonomy, forcing her to conform to other’s expectations; however, once confident she creates her own
In this lifetime, society has very pragmatic views. This makes it difficult to feel normal if you are considered different. You may be viewed as an outcast, which can make growing up harder than it already is. The idea of self-concealment is a sexual lesson that ones’ survival depends on.(Sullivan) Sullivan speaks of his own experience as a child, opening up with a story of an un-willful desire for a boy unchanging in front of him in the locker room. Sullivan states, “ He learns that that which would most give him meaning is most likely to destroy him in the eyes of others; that the condition of his friendships in the subjugation of himself”. This demonstrates why a homosexual may be deceitful and contained. Being young is a time to explore, understand ones’ self, and be open about your true personality. I believe the authors’ views because I see it daily .With these conflicts, a child may miss out on the carelessness of youth which is natural to experience before ...
From gender delegations, gender discrimination, and gender shaming the world is messed up place. From Scout, to the Flappers, to Leelah Alcorn nobody seemed to show any remorse towards the discrimination of any of them. Whether its society, the friends, or even the parents everyone seems to follows society’s gender guidelines and they beat up on who doesn’t no matter who they are, even if it drives them to the point of suicide. When society admits a gender rule everyone is pushed to follow this guideline and if they don’t well, from what it seems like they should just kill themselves unless they change. Similar to Scout, she was perfectly fine dressing like a boy, acting like a boy, and playing with boys until her Aunt installed these insecurities in her head to make her change her views and essentially herself. Society seems to always get it’s
In her book, Difference Matters, Brenda Allen discusses the importance of identity in an individual and in society. She addresses specific factors, from age to social class, that affect society. In her first chapter, more specifically, she talks about these factors as a whole in introducing the why differences matter. She then lays out the issues associated with differences in society. There are misinterpretations and misconceptions that become problematic between the relationship with individuals and society. This chapter is perfect for my topic because it shows that people differ from
An individual’s identity is determined by how others perceive them and how they perceive themselves. However, its seems as if society’s opinion of an individual has taken precedence over an individual's own judgement. This phenomena has a great effect on the decisions people make. When Olivia mistakenly marries Sebastian and ...
Members of this society must learn what the appropriate way for them to behave is and what to expect of themselves and others. Growing up, gender roles were set on me as I played with fire trucks and cars, and my sisters played with Barbie's. The types of movies we watched were different and the types of books we read were also different. It would be thought of as bizarre for me, a male, to cry during Titanic, or to read Cinderella.
Back in my younger days, I feared to lose my social and economic privilege as being seen as a homosexual female, so I policed myself to present this ‘straight girl’ persona, to avoid being publicly and institutionally sanctioned. Reflecting on Adam’s readings, “Adult heterosexuality was not taken to be an inevitability; it was an achievement of safe passage through adolescence.” (p***) Regardless, of how I felt back when I was young, I still do “act” heterosexual (acting heterosexual is the performance of the traditional straight sexual identity). Be that as it may, now I don't distress when peers around me don’t follow the social rules of normative femininity and heteronormativity in public.”Years ago I would have shunned them, or best, ignored them” (76); and yet with several developed friendships that I have made along my life journey, and a lot of courses that bring awareness to homosexuality; I’m proud to say that “gradually my awareness...was no longer the source of my shame, but the beginning of my empowerment”. (p.75-76) I have reached the point in my life, that now I force myself to acknowledge and not fear the social retaliation of the practices and normalization of heterosexuality by the women I know. Meanwhile, I may still be self-conscious around those women who don’t fit this normative, yet I won’t be imposing my opinions on them, those opinions are up to me
Identity is simply said to be a person’s own sense of their self, their personal sense of who they are or the image they give out to the rest of the society. Gender, sex and sexuality play a big role in our identity today because it also determines who we really are, not only to ourselves but also to the society. In society today, gender is when a lady acts so feminine or when a man acts manly while sex is either a man or a woman and sexuality is one is attracted to their opposite sex. People mostly judge on how a person looks like and then decide their sex.
Susan Faludi unfolds a world of male domination and its interrelationships within its confines and places women in the center of her story. Indeed it truly took an extremely self-confident woman to even entertain the idea of entering an all-male academic college like the Citadel, whose front gate practically reads like that of a young boys fort that makes the bold statement, “No girls allowed they have coodies.” Shannon Falkner was a strong willed woman with an immense amount of confidence to completely omit her gender on the Citadel application to enter this college. As if gender was not an issue, or should have never been an issue in
“He who loses individuality, loses all” (Good Reads, 2012). This quote said by Mahatma Gandhi, one of the most recognized leaders of the 19th century, can easily be used to acknowledge the importance of a society possessing unique individualistic traits and characteristics as individuality is the fuel needed to run a society. In a world, where even a mere speck of individuality is not present, that society is likely to shatter into utter destruction. Moreover, individuals should possess the ability to embrace their own uniqueness through which they will have the ability to understand distinctive phrases such as that said by William Channing, “no one should part with their individuality and become that of another”. The concept of individuality being vital to society is explored within Caitlin Tom’s essay Individuality vs. Fitting in, the American novel Little Women by Louisa Alcott, and the romantic yet empowering dramatic film Jane Eyre. The concept presented in these three works portrays how it the essence of individuality is a fundamental component for society as it aids with the recognition of societal barriers, allows the ability to empower change, and permits appreciation of the invoked change.
Citizens of today’s society have to comprehend that by conforming to the pressures of others and imitating everyone else, they will get nowhere in life. First of all, a teenage boy attends his first big high school party at a friend’s house one weekend and he is pressured into drinking beer and smoking marijuana so he will seem cool in front of the popular jocks and cheerleaders. Since many teens are so terrified of ridicule and downright embarrassment in front of fellow students, they decide to give in to their peers even though their actions may go against their beliefs. Emerson believed that by being an individual “you shall have the suffrage of the world.” Furthermore, an innocent sixteen year old girl’s parents go out of town for the weekend and she invites her cute, popular, senior star quarterback boyfriend over, but he pressures her into having sex when she i...
In the short story “Girl” by Jamaica Kincaid is a story that everyone can related to. The story is about a mother telling her daughter what to do, what not to do and how to do things. Kind of like society or parents or a friends of what to do. There has also been always been expectations of what to do and how to do things in life regards of gender, nationality or religion. The male has he’s duties and the female has different duties. However, in the typical society today, a person is supposed to graduate from high school and go straight in to an Ivy League university, to get a degree in a field of study that makes lot of money. While working a person must save money for that dream big house with the white picket fence. At the same time, you have to look for that perfect spouse so you can have the big beautiful dream wedding. After the wedding it’s the romantic honeymoon to Bora Bora. After a couple years the baby comes, and you are a happy family. Typically, that is what parents teach their children of what is what is expected of them.
A person’s identity is shaped by many different aspects. Family, culture, friends, personal interests and surrounding environments are all factors that tend to help shape a person’s identity. Some factors may have more of an influence than others and some may not have any influence at all. As a person grows up in a family, they are influenced by many aspects of their life. Family and culture may influence a person’s sense of responsibilities, ethics and morals, tastes in music, humor and sports, and many other aspects of life. Friends and surrounding environments may influence a person’s taste in clothing, music, speech, and social activities. Personal interests are what truly set individuals apart. An individual is not a puppet on the string of their puppet-master, nor a chess piece on their master’s game board, individuals choose their own paths in life. They accomplish, or strive to accomplish, goals that they have set for themselves throughout their lifetime. Individuals are different from any other individual in the world because they live their own life rather than following a crowd of puppets. A person’s identity is defined by what shaped it in the first place, why they chose to be who they are, and what makes them different from everybody else in the world. I feel that I have developed most of my identity from my own dreams, fantasies, friends, and idols.
Humanity is defined by one major factor: one’s understating of the self. By understanding one’s self, one can understand society and the world that surrounds themselves. There is one thing that can often distort one’s personality, one’s identity. By identifying as one thing a person can often change how they act or do certain things. This is often found to hide one’s true motives or intention, but it can also be used to hide hidden factors that aren’t as prevalent. One’s personality and identity are very closely linked, and tend to play off one another. This fact can be show in within multiple works. To name a few authors who demonstrate this fact: Clifford Geertz, Horace Miner, and Andrei Toom. Their works seek to dive deeper
middle of paper ... ... women know and think that if they don’t act or behave to their expectations they will. looked down upon and possibly neglected by their family and society. To avoid losing friends and family, most male and female, construct their own role in their life.