Personal Narrative: The Year Of Magical Thinking

We all go through things. Sometimes it even has such a strong impact that it changes our lives forever. I didn’t always have it so easy growing up. I was born with vocal cord paralysis, which caused me to have a soft, hoarse, and breathy voice. I was short, I was skinny. Despite these things, I was a happy kid with a normal life. I was a cheerleader. However, something happened when I was just 9 years old. Something that changed me forever. In "The Year of Magical Thinking," Joan Didion states “life changes in the instant. The ordinary instant.” She means that things happen when you least expect it. No one expected it, but I was diagnosed with scoliosis. This medical condition took a huge toll on my life. One day, I went to the doctor

I hated it. It was very tight and very uncomfortable. It was so tight that I found it difficult to breath normally. It began at my chest and went all the way down to my hips. I found it very difficult to bend down as well. It was then time for recess. I couldn’t go down the slide like I always did. I couldn’t play on the playground like normally because the brace restricted me from moving freely. One of my classmates then noticed that I was wearing a brace. She had a peculiar look on her face as she touched the hard plastic. I told her it was my brace that I have to wear because I have scoliosis. “Scoliosis? What’s that?” I couldn’t really explain it to her, as I wasn’t quite sure myself. She told me that I was weird and walked away. It made me sad that she saw me differently. Kids picked on me for it. People stared at me because I was physically deformed as the curve progressed. I remember being told to “sit up straight” by a man while I was at church. My mom and I just sat there speechless. He probably thought I was being impolite, but I couldn’t help but slouch. I hated wearing the brace and took it off as soon as I got home. However, my mom made me wear it anyway at night. I remember tossing and turning. I couldn’t sleep because I just wasn’t comfortable. I wasn’t oblivious anymore. I was very aware of the severity of the situation. I just couldn’t understand why it was happening to

That wasn't exactly the case. Years elapsed. I got older. Puberty and life hit me. I was at that age where people start dating, going to parties, and do other activities. Surgery left me with scars that I wanted to keep a secret. It changed the way I dressed, what I thought about myself, and my social life. I did not want to wear anything that would reveal my scars. I never went swimming. I never had a boyfriend. I felt left out all the time. While everyone was out having fun, I was home alone. I was afraid to make friends or do things because I feared rejection and embarrassment. I was constantly worried of what others would think. One day I was waiting in the lunch line, and these girls behind me asked (loudly) why I walked so weird. They were laughing at me. I was humiliated. It wasn’t just a crooked back for me. When I looked in the mirror all I saw were my flaws. I saw an asymmetrical waistline. I saw a still slightly curved back. I saw my