Personal Narrative: My Pursuit Of Perfectionism

Human beings are, by design, built for continual personal development and self-improvement. We are naturally competitive. Driven to become the best, we strive to overcome every obstacle in our way to be better than the person next to us or the person we used to be. Striving for excellence is motivating and effective, but chasing perfection is demoralizing. While the pursuit of greatness and perfection may look alike, the results are vastly different. The definition of perfectionism is “the tendency to establish and pursue very high personal goals, along with other features such a strong tendency to self-criticism” (Frost et al. 119). In a highly competitive society, young people are especially susceptible to practice perfectionist habits and

Perfectionists have an all-or-nothing mindset that's propelled by a crippling fear of failure. They also have what's called conditional self-worth. They think they’re only a good person if they are successful (Harnish). From my own personal experiences, I can attest that as I moved further along in school and sports, I chased perfection at an increasingly dangerous rate. I strived to be valedictorian, president of National Honor Society, captain of the basketball and softball team, and the list goes on and on. Now, those goals were achievable, but when I added more goals to the list, I created an unrealistic list of achievements to chase. I was no longer determined to achieve a few goals of excellence, I was struggling to become perfect without realizing it. A fine line lays between excellence and perfection. Dr. Kenneth Ginsburg, psychologist and professor of pediatrics, declares that “perfectionists consider themselves unacceptable unless they meet impossibly high self-imposed standards.” Elaborating, Kenneth goes on to explain that perfectionists lack creativity and innovation because they fear failure. Frequently, students who struggle with perfectionism fear receiving any grade below an A. Mild setbacks such as receiving a B+ in a class are catastrophic. During my years in high school, I felt the same way as Ginsburg’s example; I could not earn anything except an A

The pressure to be perfect all the time is draining. Young people struggle juggling responsibilities at school, work, and home in general, but when one is a perfectionist, every task becomes more difficult. From my own experience, I can attest that life in general becomes exhausting when chasing after perfection. As I mentioned before, I would not accept anything below an A during school, so I sacrificed many opportunities to spend time with friends and family to study. While this proved beneficial to my grade point average, my relationships suffered as well as my mental health. Relationships can become strained when one is constantly putting others aside for personal success. Confirming the conflict between perfectionism and relationships, Dr. Virginia Harvey, professor and director of the school psychology program at the University of Massachusetts, declares that “perfectionists try to protect themselves from embarrassment, criticism, anger, and approval by withdrawing from friendships and love.” Life seems easier to perfectionists when there are less people to impress or receive approval from; therefore, perfectionists tend to neglect present relationships and refuse to create new relations. Likewise, work is disturbed too. Obsessing over details, perfectionists tend to overthink situations and become flustered easily. Dr. Michele Gaspar researched the effects of