Nonviolence Self Analysis

In today’s society, everything is open for interpretation. Many things are taken into consideration when an action is being judged. Intent and reason are two of the many factors. I think an individual defines aggression and violence. Yes, major acts of violence are universally agreed on. But subtle things like tone of voice and attitude are up for interpretation. Some people may say sarcasm is a form of violent speech and others may not. But to identity sarcasm and consciously process ones tone isn’t something many of us do. Being conscious of ones actions and words is a very hard task. We go about our day habitually and unconsciously. This assignment took a lot of brainpower, focusing on the little habitually actions is something I would never

usually do. There were certain steps I had to take to achieve the goal of this assignment; define nonviolence, identify if my behavior changed, identity the costs and benefits of behaving nonviolently, and see if people noticed my change in behavior.
Nonviolence is a vast spectrum that is open for interpretation and discussion.

There are physical, verbal, and even nonverbal acts of nonviolence. I chose to tackle all three acts in my experiment. From the time I woke up, I was at peace with myself. I had no negative thoughts nor did I look for something to complain about. I was content with who I was and what my life was like. This attitude determined my verbal and physical acts of nonviolence. If I was mentally peaceful, I will also become physically and emotionally peaceful. When my attitude is gloomy, my mood becomes gloomy. But because I consciously chose to be peaceful and content, I became happy and in a great mood. This attitude led to a nonaggressive attitude. I let go of trying to control my surrounds and let life take its course. Although this was great for me, letting go of all phoniness and conforming behavior can make other people uncomfortable. I tend to smile and laugh at things, even when I do not find them funny or amusing. But I do it because it is what society tells me to do. I stopped laughing at things I didn’t find funny just to make the other person feel comfortable. And this made them extremely awkward, to the point where my newfound attitude was coming off as rude. When in fact, I was being genuine with them and

myself.
The moment I let go of trying to control my life, I felt peaceful.

This peace spilled into the different avenues in my life. I was nonviolent with my friends and family, and even myself. I was happier and in a better mood than I usually am. I suffered with clinical depression for a while; I had no control over my emotions. I would struggle with my depression by trying to fight it and take control. In the end, the depression won. Going through this for months, led to me fearing the idea of letting go and take life take its course. I was afraid I would fall into my depressive state if I didn’t take charge. But this type of “letting go” was different. I did it with the intention of being happy, peaceful, and nonviolent. This mentality made it easier for me to let

go.
There are pros and cons in everything we do. Sometimes one outweighs the other. Some costs I had to face were vulnerability. In the beginning of letting go, I had a fear that I was opening myself up to rejection and judgment. But in fact, people embraced my peaceful attitude. They thought I was in a great mood and talked to me more, I didn’t fight with friends or family. Which in turn, made me happy. I overall had a really good day. The costs only lasted the very beginning of the experiment, but the benefits lasted throughout the whole day. Feeling happy and peaceful outweighs the initial vulnerability I felt in the beginning of the day.
My friends and family usually always pick up on how I am feeling certain days. I am the type of person to display my emotions upfront. If I am not in a good mood, everyone could tell. As soon as my friends and family started talking to me, they noticed how happy and peaceful I was.
Consciously acting nonviolent is a very hard task for most people. But once you master it, you become peaceful and content with your surroundings. I encourage other to remember that aggressive behavior is trying to take control of your surroundings. Once you let go, is when you will experience true nonviolence.