Monogamy: Its essence and benefits
“From this moment, I, take you, as my best friend for life. I pledge to honor, encourage, and support you through our walk together. I promise to provide for your needs and always make you a priority in my life. With every beat of my heart, I will love you. This is my solemn vow” (Daversa). This vow is an example of words expressed between a man and woman on their wedding day as they face one another and declare their love in front of family and friends. However, when the same man says these words on more than one occasion to different women, then the validity is called into question. Monogamy is the practice or state of being married to, or having a sexual relationship with one person at a time (Little et. al. 1275). Although rare, monogamous relationships can be observed among animals in the wild. Beavers, which mate for life, use their union as a survival tool to construct and maintain their dams (Caraza). While humans are considered animals, they have developed beyond their counterparts to develop a whole set of complicated emotions - love, jealousy, rage, and depression. Generally, animals have no need for emotional fulfillment. Their brains do not have the capacity to house these feelings that humans have come to develop. Humans, on the other hand, have emotional needs, and among these are to express love and to receive love in return. Man's greatest fear is loneliness, and monogamy helps give humans that deep, emotional connection with another human being that we all need to survive (Becker 34). Monogamy provides individuals with emotional and physical stability that cannot be achieved with alternatives to monogamy.
There are many people who are of the opinion that monogamy is monoto...
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...ng to protect what is theirs. The sense of ownership now envelops them.
Monogamy, in all sense of it and what it stands for, is the best form of a relationship. It’s big enough to comprise father, mother, and children and yet small enough to relate and understand one another’s concerns and expectations. A well guided monogamous relationship embedded in trust and love is the best environment one can thrive in. This especially is true for children who cannot make decisions for themselves and are completely dependent on the choices made for them. Monogamy also encourages gender equality and compromises between two parties to reach fundamental decisions. The benefits to monogamy greatly outweigh those for the alternative relationship styles. Thus, monogamy is a strong foundation and creates an environment for enhancing the positive growth for many generations to come.
While marriage is still quite alive, the rates are definitely declining. It is interesting to distinguish the qualities and characteristics of relationships between generations. At some point, marriage would succeed or fail depending on happiness and satisfaction of couples. Today, there is high expectation between couples. Arlene Skolnick talks about a few different topics one of them being “ For better and for Worst”. For this topic Arlene Skolnick talks about a sociologist Jesse Bernard argument that every marriage consists of two other marriages, his and hers, and how marriages typically favors men rather than the women. He sates that that the stresses that are experienced in a marriage come from expectations between the husband and wife. Anther topic Arlene Skolnick talks about is “Marriage is Movie, Not a Snapshot”. For this topic Arlene Skolnick talks a little about Heroclitis the ancient Greek philosopher saying of how “you can never step into the same river twice, because it is always moving” and how this is smaller to a marriage. Arlene Skolnick talks about a few different studies that where done over a short period of time demonstrating that families, marriages, and people can change over
Human beings are not isolated individuals. We do not wander through a landscape of trees and dunes alone, reveling in our own thoughts. Rather, we need relationships with other human beings to give us a sense of support and guidance. We are social beings, who need talk and company almost as much as we need food and sleep. We need others so much, that we have developed a custom that will insure company: marriage. Marriage assures each of us of company and association, even if it is not always positive and helpful. Unfortunately, the great majority of marriages are not paragons of support. Instead, they hold danger and barbs for both members. Only the best marriages improve both partners. So when we look at all three of Janie’s marriages, only her marriage to Teacake shows the support, guidance, and love.
The article Breaking the Cycle Mother, Daughter Find It Can Be Difficult to Leave Polygamy behind Polygamy: It 's Tough to Break the Cycle by Joan O 'Brien is about a mother’s experience leaving a polygamous marriage. This mother, Betsy Barlow of Salt Lake City also inspired her daughter, Ellen to do the same thing. It is explained that Mrs. Barlow felt that being a part of a polygamous marriage was defeating for women and herself. O’Brien states, “Barlow believes that in practice, polygamy ``suppresses ' ' women”. Most women would drop out of High school to raise children for the one husband and Mrs. Barlow was taught that this was the only way to reach the celestial kingdom. Her parents taught her this and she openly admits to teaching her
As shown above, The DNA of Relationships was a powerful book to read for the class. I believe of that the actions to endanger all my relationships and taking the responsibility to have safe, full of heart steps to face the dangers with the help of God. From the book, I now have the full picture of what it takes to keep the relationships strong and safe because not all people are the same around me and I must take the right steps to protect all my relationships from harm.
Have you ever considered cheating on your partner? Studies show that there is a 76% chance of either partner in a marriage committing infidelity (Ferrer 55). In light of the common occurrence of infidelity within monogamous relationships in our society, would it not be logical to consider the possibility that non-monogamous relationship dynamics might be appropriate for some individuals? The idea seems to be on people’s minds, since it has also been coming up in popular culture lately, in shows like “Big Love” and “Sister-Wives”, both of which focus on polygamy, the practice of being married to more than one person at a time. Additionally, there have been many articles written about polyamory, the practice of having more than one intimate relationship at one time with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved, and non-monogamy recently. One such article is “Beyond Monogamy and Polyamory,” written by Jorge Ferrer, Ph.D., who is the Chair of the Dept. of East-West Psychology at the California Institute of Integral Studies, and was published in ReVision Journal. Ferrer’s goal in writing this article is to expose readers, mainly other scholars, to the possibility of non-monogamous relationships, and the concept of sympathetic joy. While I agree with much of what Ferrer is saying in his article, particularly his points about sympathetic joy, jealousy, genetics, and his responses to the arguments against polyamory, the fact that he overlooks the religions that do not support his theory, while using others to support his theory, weakens his argument.
Mention the concept of polygamy in any “civilized” gathering, and you just may be able to see the shiver of repulsion that ripples through the crowd. By substituting the word “polyamory” in, you will be able to circumvent this reaction – but only because everyone is staring at you in baffled silence instead. So we begin, as always, with definitions.
Many people would happily accept an opportunity to have their daily stress reduced by employing help with not only their children but also with daily household responsibilities of cooking and cleaning. Especially in this fragile economic state the average family living in America cannot afford the luxury of hiring a house cleaner, cook or nanny. However, there are polygamists families in America have the abilities of multiple adults contributing to the same household because of the lifestyle choice of having multiple spouses. The extra help comes at a price for woman, by having to share her husband with other woman and raising her children in the difficult and uncommon lifestyle. Polygamy takes a total acceptance and understanding of it by the mothers, in order for polygamy not to have a negative psychological impact on her children. Children are the innocent victims of polygamy; consequently, they grow up witnessing a tense environment filled with their mother’s insecurities and rivalries with the other wives, which sequentially end up harming the child in the end. Furthermore, polygamy can be psychologically damaging to children because of the increased rates of not only welfare fraud, domestic violence, and underage marriages but also child abuse and neglect.
Marriage is termed as a legitimate commitment or social establishment which unites two people mutually as husband and wife. The agreement ascertains privileges and responsibilities amid spouses, spouses and children and spouses and in-laws. Marriage is deemed to be a momentous union in every society. It is significant in terms of providing security, emotional support and fulfilling economic, social, cultural and physical needs. These needs are the natural cravings of young adults that drive them towards matrimony. It is a foundation that is based on personal responsibilities which form the backbone of civilizations.
Originally, after choosing my topic, I had planned on focusing on the traditions of Muslim marriage-- however, the more I researched the more corruption was unveiled within the sacrament. I don’t know about you all, but I find controversial things far more interesting. I would like to preface my speech by saying although many of the practices I am going to speak about are widely accepted throughout the Middle East—however, this does not make them justifiable. Like all controversial topics, there are two sides to this argument. Arranged marriages, child marriage, and polygamy are practices passed off as “traditions,” but it is my goal to shed some light on the topic. It is not uncommon for couples to marry based off caste and wealth rather than
Being cheated on can be traumatizing and possibly the worst thing that has ever happened to you. After you find out that your partner has been cheating on you your instinct may be to run. Making a rash decision is not the answer. According to The New Monogamy, by Tammy Nelson, there are three stages a couple in this crisis will go through after the discovery of an affair. First is the crisis stage, then the understanding stage, and lastly the vision stage.
For thousands of years until today, the best way to officially be the partner of someone is through marriage. People have practiced marriage for thousands of years. Many cultures see marriage as the best method to celebrate the love of a couple until death tears them apart. “Marriage establishes and maintains family, creates and sustains the ties of kinship, and is the basis of community” (Rowe 2). Marriage is a concept bigger than ones happiness and it is the basic for creating a peaceful home for the family. According to Rowe, “This sense of home requires the dynamic participation of both women and men--the women to mother and the men to father--to fulfill the daily roles of teaching, nurturing and protecting children” ( 2). Parents have an obligation to take care for children, so that when they grow up they are able to become a person who is strong enough to support himself. But there are different opinions whether raising a child should be shared equally between parents. One group thinks that it is essential for a child to grow up with the love and care of both parents. Meanwhile, others believe that child raising should be shared in a way that suits the family. While single parents argue that even without one parent they can give their children the needed love and care.
Polygamy is becoming a part of the question, Is this is an alternative lifestyle that should be allowed? There are television shows and criminal cases about polygamy ( Kiesbye). Some common tv shows about polygamy are Sister Wives and Big Love. Since this is a new upcoming type of marriage the tv shows are showing all the good parts about polygamy ,or “fluffing” it up, rather than show any negatives aspects about it. There are multiple things associated with polygamy not just the side where all the family members are happy. There is a darker side to polygamy that the media has not been showng. Polygamy is deleterious to marriage and society because women are treated horribly unequally and horribly during marriage, children are abused, and
The Western Religious leaders and moralists believe only one spouse for life is the highest form of marriage. Some of the most "primitive" peoples are strictly monogamous in their ideals, while some "highly advanced" cultures have moved away from the stri...
Polygamy is defined as the condition or practice of having more than one spouse at a time. Though it has existed in many cultures throughout the world, polygamy is still very prevalent in most Islamic societies today. There are however several guidelines laid out in Islamic law governing the practice. Here we will examine the practice of polygamy in Islam and those laws which govern its legality.
In today’s society the assumption asserts that there must be only two adults integrated in a relationship, however in polygamous environments, having more than one spouse is traditional. Some may argue that Polygamy is simply just an alternate lifestyle. This, however, ceases to be true. Young girls are being forced to marry older men and sometimes relatives. Little boys are often abandoned because it appears to be competition for older men. Children are victims of sexual and physical abuse. Whereas, for women, they generally become stripped of their money and experience competition against the multiple wives a husband. Although Polygamy is viewed as immoral by society, the main focus point should be saving young children and women because