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Relationship between father and daughter essay
Relationship between father and daughter essay
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In the coming of age novel Under the Mesquite, Guadalupe Garcia McCall develops the conflicts between Lupita/Guadalupe, the narrator, and her father, or as Lupita calls him, her Papi, in order to display the contrasting perspectives in the way they view their current life and future for Lupita and her family. Towards the beginning of the novel, after Lupita’s Quinceañera, she exclaims what being a señorita means to her versus her family and friends. For her father, “señorita means/ he has to be a guard dog/ when boys are around”. However, to Lupita it means “melancolía: settling into sadness” (McCall 75, 76). They view Lupita’s future life as a señorita very differently. While they may both be thinking of Lupita’s future, …show more content…
her Papi is thinking of how it will affect him while Lupita is thinking of the emotions in her future.
Furthermore, Lupita suggested to her father that he takes her mother to a cancer clinic but the clinic is six hours away from their home. He tells her that he “[doesn’t] know how [they’re] going to do it”. Lupita thinks that there is nothing “more to think about[. Her] Mami needs this” (McCall 114, 115). While Lupita is focused on her Mami and her needs, her Papi is worried about how this will affect his children, even if it could help his wife. Their priorities are very different making their perspectives on how to deal with Lupita’s mother’s care different as well. In addition, after Lupita’s mom dies and Lupita starts thinking about her future since she has already graduated, she confronts her father with the idea of going off to college. He tells her that he ‘“made promises to [her] mother. / [He] told her [he’d] take good care of [Lupita], /… there’s no place safer than home/… [He] can’t let [her] go [to …show more content…
college]’”. However, Lupita thinks that ‘“taking good care of [her]’” means letting her go to college and start her new life (McCall 200, 201). This difference in perspective of Lupita and her father on her future causes a lot of conflicts between them. This is because to Lupita going to college and starting her own life also means honoring her mother’s wishes of filling her notebook pages with love and hope while her father feels he is honoring her mother by fulfilling his promise and making her stay home where she is safe. Throughout the novel, Guadalupe Garcia McCall uses conflict between Lupita and her father to show their contrasting perspectives. Along with the use of contrasting perspectives, the author also uses section breaks to emphasize the various struggles Lupita faces in specific times of her life.
For instance, in part one, “The Weight of Words”, Lupita is just finding out about her mother’s cancer and has not yet adjusted to her new life with this conflict. She is facing a very specific struggle in this section of the novel: learning to accept her mother’s sickness. While this is an ongoing problem in the novel, it is the main conflict in this section only, not in other parts of Lupita’s life. In this section, Lupita is talking to her friend, Mireya, about her mother, and while Mireya is telling her that her mom is “going to die”; Lupita insists that ‘she’s not” (McCall 19). Although her friend is trying to prepare her for the inevitable, Lupita refuses to accept this. Additionally, in part three of the novel, “Crossing Borders”, Lupita’s main conflict is about her culture. She had been taking drama classes since she started high school and was told by her teacher that to be successful she needed to lose her accent. As she attempted to do this her close friends started making fun of her saying things like, ‘“You talk like you’re one of them. /… You talk like/ you wanna be white’” (McCall 80). Lupita became conflicted in regards to her culture. She had thought that she had been devoted to her culture and was now questioning this. Throughout this section, the conflict comes up
multiple times whereas at this point in the book she has mostly accepted her mother’s sickness. As well as this in part five, “Cut like a Diamond”, Lupita’s mother died, meaning that in part six, “Words on the Wind” her mother’s sickness was not her main conflict, but now she was contemplating her future. In order to decide what she wanted to do with her life, she went back to Mexico and stayed at her abuelita’s house temporarily. By the time she left she had realized that her mother would want her to move on and to her this meant going to college and starting her own life. However, her father wanted her to stay home and help him take care of her siblings. This made it hard for her to leave without her father’s permission. She was fighting with both herself and her father throughout the sixth section and this was her main conflict whereas she was no longer contemplating her culture. Throughout the different sections of the novel, Lupita faces different hardships that come with specific times in her life.
Roxanne faces a relationship crisis with her fiance since he wants to receive a scholarship and play college ball in another city. Roxanne had no past experience and Roberta suggests her to “try not to get too worked up about [the issue] … [because] [she] [will] get it straightened out” (32) eventually. Roberta enlightens Roxanne about the uncertainty in life and that one should make their own decisions. Thus, Roxanne also gains from Roberta’s advice.
Because of the life that Christine leads, the role of mother and daughter are switched and Rayona often finds herself watching out for her mom. When Ray comes home from school, she would often learn that her mother had gone out to party. Times like this meant that Rayona had to care for herself. It is not uncommon for one to stay out late; but when it is the parent who is doing so, one must question the responsibility of the person. When Christine leaves the hospital, Rayona shows up and helps prevent a potential disaster. She realizes what her mother plans to do, and that her mom will not crash the car with her on board. While Christine is not very reliable, she has no wish to hurt Rayona either; Ray's prediction was correct. As a child, Rayona must fulfill more obligations than a normal teen. Over the time that leads to her abandonment, Rayona begins to feel displaced from her mother. Christine's increasing self concern causes Rayona to feel her mom is ignoring her, when that is not true at all.
The chapter I read opened my eyes to Culture and Conflict. The story discussed conflict between Bina and Kevin, and their relationship with Binas parents. Binas parents were unimpressed that Bina decided to marry a man from a different culture, which is an untraditional act. This caused conflict between Bina and Kevin’s relationship. Kevin promised Bina that he would try and practice a more Indian lifestyle, but over time these promises started to fail. This put tension on their relationship and often made Bina feel self-conscious about her relationship. In the end Bina came to realize she could practice still practice her culture, Kevin’s family’s culture and their new Canadian culture.
No matter what actions or words a mother chooses, to a child his or her mother is on the highest pedestal. A mother is very important to a child because of the nourishing and love the child receives from his or her mother but not every child experiences the mother’s love or even having a mother. Bragg’s mother was something out of the ordinary because of all that she did for her children growing up, but no one is perfect in this world. Bragg’s mother’s flaw was always taking back her drunken husband and thinking that he could have changed since the last time he...
Rather, it criticizes this culture through its portrayal of women. The narrative is focused on a male and is told by a male, which reflects the male-centered society it is set in. However, when we compare how the narrator views these women to who they really are, the discrepancies act as a critique on the Dominican culture. Yunior, who represents the typical Dominican male, sees women as objects, conquests, when in fact their actions show their resistance to be categorized as such. Beli, whose childhood was filled with male domination by Trujillo and the family she worked for, attempts to gain power through sexuality, the avenue the culture pushes women toward. This backfires, creating a critique of the limited opportunities available for women. La Inca portrays a different side to this, working quietly but in ways that are not socially acceptable through self-employment. Society attempts to cage these women, but they continue to fight against it. Diaz, in an interview, quoted James Baldwin, stating, “Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced" (Fassler). He exhibits the misogyny in the system but does not support it, rather critiques it through strong female characters. By drawing attention to the problem, the novel advocates for change. Diaz writes, at the end of part 1, “Nothing more exhilarating… than saving yourself by the simple act of waking”
Demetria Martínez’s Mother Tongue is divided into five sections and an epilogue. The first three parts of the text present Mary/ María’s, the narrator, recollection of the time when she was nineteen and met José Luis, a refuge from El Salvador, for the first time. The forth and fifth parts, chronologically, go back to her tragic experience when she was seven years old and then her trip to El Salvador with her son, the fruit of her romance with José Luis, twenty years after she met José Luis. And finally the epilogue consists a letter from José Luis to Mary/ María after her trip to El Salvador. The essay traces the development of Mother Tongue’s principal protagonists, María/ Mary. With a close reading of the text, I argue how the forth chapter, namely the domestic abuse scene, functions as a pivotal point in the Mother Tongue as it helps her to define herself.
North Americans and Mexicans must also attempt to overcome the ideas that women should be seen and not heard. In Anzaldúa’s words, “Hocicona, repeloma, chismosa, having a big mouth, questioning, carrying tales are all signs of being mal criada. In my culture they are all words that are derogatory if applied to women – I’ve ever heard them applied to men” (2947).
Most of these conflicts are self-imposed drama that interrupt the story often through the character conflict. She builds up these conflicts in her head and make them much worse than they really are. For example; she worries about her family judging her by obsessing about every tiny detail. Later she realizes that this was never an actual conflict because her family loves her and does not judge her. Another conflict she deals with is not knowing her culture and how she does not feel Chinese. “I ask, what does Jing-mei mean?” “Your name so special, Jing like excellent jing. Not just good, it’s something pure, essential the best quality. Jing is good leftover stuff when you take impurities out of something like gold, or rice, or salt. And ‘Mei,’ this is common mei, as in meimei, ‘younger sister.’ ” (190). All June May needed to do in order to understand her Chinese heritage was ask about it. Before the trip to China she did not even know what her name meant in Chinese. She grew up in America and never really cared about her Chinese roots when she was younger but now that her mother has died she feels ashamed not knowing her culture. She finally realizes that she doesn’t need to be ashamed and learns from her father, his aunt and other family members about her family history. Another similar conflict she deals with
By doing this, the child would save her parent’s from years of heartache and regret but would ultimately lead to the end of her own existence. Although if she chooses not to tell her parent’s the whole family will face inevitable sadness, hatred and despair. One example of conflict shows the thought process and the strain the child is experiencing, “I want to go up to them and say Stop…but I don’t do it. I want to live.” (Olds). This is a strong example of internal conflict, which is described as “the psychological struggle within the mind of a literary or dramatic character, the resolution of which creates the plot 's suspense” ("Internal Conflict"). The poet chose to use internal conflict to show and emphasize the emotional distress and emotional fight she is experiencing with deciding her parent’s and her own
The contrast between the Mexican world versus the Anglo world has led Anzaldua to a new form of self and consciousness in which she calls the “New Mestiza” (one that recognizes and understands her duality of race). Anzaldua lives in a constant place of duality where she is on the opposite end of a border that is home to those that are considered “the queer, the troublesome, the mongrel and the mulato” (25). It is the inevitable and grueling clash of two very distinct cultures that produces the fear of the “unknown”; ultimately resulting in alienation and social hierarchy. Anzaldua, as an undocumented woman, is at the bottom of the hierarchy. Not only is she a woman that is openly queer, she is also carrying the burden of being “undocumented”. Women of the borderlands are forced to carry two degrading labels: their gender that makes them seem nothing more than a body and their “legal” status in this world. Many of these women only have two options due to their lack of English speaking abilities: either leave their homeland – or submit themselves to the constant objectification and oppression. According to Anzaldua, Mestizo culture was created by men because many of its traditions encourage women to become “subservient to males” (39). Although Coatlicue is a powerful Aztec figure, in a male-dominated society, she was still seen
The relationship between a mother and her family is one of strength and commitment. A mother will go through long anything to make sure her family is safe. In 1982, in Lawrenceville Georgia, Mrs. Angela Cavallo saved her son, Tony Cavallo,who was pinned down by his Chevrolet Impala. The Chevrolet slipped off his car jack and fell on Tony. Angela was able to lift the car and then provide CPR for her son and saved his life. Family is the most important thing, and Ma demonstrates her maternal characteristics throughout the book to show that sticking together saves families.
Looking back on the death of Larissa’s son, Zebedee Breeze, Lorraine examines Larissa’s response to the passing of her child. Lorraine says, “I never saw her cry that day or any other. She never mentioned her sons.” (Senior 311). This statement from Lorraine shows how even though Larissa was devastated by the news of her son’s passing, she had to keep going. Women in Larissa’s position did not have the luxury of stopping everything to grieve. While someone in Lorraine’s position could take time to grieve and recover from the loss of a loved one, Larissa was expected to keep working despite the grief she felt. One of the saddest things about Zebedee’s passing, was that Larissa had to leave him and was not able to stay with her family because she had to take care of other families. Not only did Larissa have the strength to move on and keep working after her son’s passing, Larissa and other women like her also had no choice but to leave their families in order to find a way to support them. As a child, Lorraine did not understand the strength Larissa must have had to leave her family to take care of someone else’s
In the second part of the novel it explains the story of Laila and her family. Laila’s mother does not seem to be bothered with her much. It tells about how she forgot to pick her up from school one day and a couple of boys squirted her with a toy gun filled with pee. Laila comes home and she wakes her mother up and tells her what has happened, she barely seems worried. This happens often in parenting. A lot of times parents can be swamped with things in their own lives that they can forget about things that go on in their children’s lives. This incident angered Laila as she thought about it, “Of course, it wouldn't have happened if Mammy had shown up like she was supposed to either. Sometimes Laila wondered why Mammy had even bothered having her. People, she believed now, shouldn't be allowed to have new children if they'd already given away all their love to their old ones. It wasn't fair. A fit of anger claimed her.” (Hosseini, 118-119) Mammy always seemed distant to Laila and Laila always ponders this. She thought about how her mother and father fought and how her mother might love her brothers more than she loves her. Then the incident happens and she is now almost certain that she does. Her brothers are killed in war and her mother becomes depressed. This breaks the family and now Laila is even more distant from her mother. Things like this can cause devastation to a family and it can make things different between them, just as it is in Laila’s family. Laila remembers what it was like to have the family happy and all enjoying each other’s company, “Laila's favorite part of Mammy's good days was when Babi came home, when she and Mammy looked up from the board and grinned at him with brown teeth. A gust of contentment puffed through the room then, and Laila caught a momentary glimpse of the tenderness, the romance, that had once bound her parents back when this house had been crowded and
...to doctor affected her relationship with her dad. They got closer and she was surprise that when her dad heard the news from his doctor, they didn’t have to tie him down in fact of his aggressive behavior “I sat beside him. This was my father” (Olds 440). She was expecting her dad to act crazy since she had always known him as an aggressive person but she did not get that from him. However, his attitude changed instantly and starts and the way her daughter viewed him as an alcoholic changed her perception of her dad.
...pport that they require. These events force us to encounter a leap of maturity, in order for us to finally realize our mothers’ need for love. By experiencing these crises, we can see our parents not as helpful objects, but rather as human beings like ourselves.