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The sanction of marriage in our society is something that is still strived for and valued. Most people still crave the idea of intimacy with commitment, finding a soul mate is highly romanticized in media and our society. According to Berkman and Glass (2000), people who lacked close ties with others were two to three times as likely to die over a 9 year span and individuals who were married in the USA were less likely to die from any of the top ten cancers than unmarried people. These studies show us that not only is it in our nature to seek out intimate relationships with others but there are many benefits that we receive in return. Yet with all of these benefits and people who are still attempting to seek out healthy marriages we still
Most of these beliefs relate to communication and how important speaking and understanding your partner is. This is a point that both Peggy and Joseph kept reiterating especially in maintaining a long term relationship. The relationship continuously changes and every once in awhile you find yourself recommitting to this new found relationship . Eidelson and Epstein (1982), state that dysfunction occurs when partners don 't see it this way and start to believe that their partner cannot change especially when it comes to faults and bettering themselves. Dysfunction also occurs when partners start to believe that the majority of the relationship feels just like the honeymoon phase and that great relationships just happen and that no work is involved. This is an aspect that Joseph stated multiple times that he felt attributed to their long relationship. Peggy comes from a two parent household where Joseph grew up in a single parent home and didn 't get a chance to witness a healthy marriage play out. Realizing that this is something he wanted and he was at a disadvantage he made sure that this was something he worked at constantly by reading books and attending lectures on relationships. Eidelson and Epstein (1982), would say that this would be an attribute that would prevent dysfunction in the relationship removing a great risk if distress and dissatisfaction from the
A married couple may not always be the happiest couple even though it may seem that love is expressed in the relationship. Some marriages are meant to be while some are not. What causes a person to be dissatisfied with their marriage? Or how do external factors play a role on the outcome of a relationship? As for the case in "Holding Things Together" and "The Painted Door"; these short stories have a few similarities, but they also have many contrasting factors to take into consideration on why one couple is successful with there relationship while the other is not.
Human beings are not isolated individuals. We do not wander through a landscape of trees and dunes alone, reveling in our own thoughts. Rather, we need relationships with other human beings to give us a sense of support and guidance. We are social beings, who need talk and company almost as much as we need food and sleep. We need others so much, that we have developed a custom that will insure company: marriage. Marriage assures each of us of company and association, even if it is not always positive and helpful. Unfortunately, the great majority of marriages are not paragons of support. Instead, they hold danger and barbs for both members. Only the best marriages improve both partners. So when we look at all three of Janie’s marriages, only her marriage to Teacake shows the support, guidance, and love.
Every 13 seconds, couples in America get divorced (Palacios). What is pushing these couples to get married if half of the marriages fail anyway? Leading into the 21st century, people decide to choose the single life over the married life, and use their energy and time towards rebounding, money, material love, power, freedom, pride, and their career. Superficial love often conquers idealistic love in today’s society due to one’s self-interest persuading them away from love.
Gigi and Alex’s relationship could be described as storge, “friendly lovers” (McCornack, 2013, p. 284). Their relationship is “rooted in friendship” as they were strictly friends before anything else. Ben and Janine’s marriage was the style of pragma, “practical lovers”. They got married right out of college where it was “logical” and “founded in common sense”. (McCornack, 2013, p. 284) Different from these two styles were the characters Beth and Neil. Beth and Neil were in a relationship where they shared strong feelings for each other despite the fact that they had opposite views of marriage. At one point it becomes too much and they break up. However they find their way back to each other and each is willing to compromise. Beth is okay with not getting married as long as their relationship stays strong. Because she is willing to do this, Neil appreciates her sacrifice and asks for her hand in marriage. This love style can be described as agape, “forgiving lovers” who are “patient, giving, and unconditional.” (McCornack, 2013, p. 284) Despite their differences, they forgave each other and made compromise. Comparing the relationships in the movie it appears the style of a romantic relationship has an impact its chance at survival. Because the relationship style, pragma, is based off a good idea rather than an actual connection, it seemed as Ben and Janine didn’t know what they were fighting for. As for the others, they made it work against their
For as long as we can remember, the idea that marriage is sacred, desirable, and even necessary has persisted in the western world. In a way, society has taught us that in order to live a normal, fulfilled life, one must find their soul mate, marry them, and spend the rest of eternity together. According to tradition, a perfect marriage is characterized by a husband that goes to work every day while the wife remains within the home cooking, cleaning, and taking care of the children. Tradition has further dictated that once the husband returns from work, the wife has dinner ready and the family sits down around the table to share a meal together. American literature is full of stories that both play on or challenge these traditional roles within a marriage. But, one might ask, does
Monogamy is a cultural norm that dominates many modern societies, and when individuals engage in monogamous relationships, they are unconsciously conforming to historical and cultural legacies of what is perceived as love that predate their illusions of personal agency. Although anthropological records indicate that 85% of human societies have tended towards polygamy (Henrich, Boyd and Richerson 2012), the modern culture of monogamy has rapidly risen and spread in the past millennium (Senthilingam 2016). This demonstrates how an individual’s conception of a heterosexual relationship as normatively monogamous has been constructed by social forces. In addition, social forces in the form of state legislation also perpetuate and reinforce an individual’s conception of what a romantic relationship should entail. Monogamous heterosexual marriage remains to be the only form of marriage with legal recognition in many countries. An individual’s belief that a romantic relationship should culminate in marriage is hence not formed through independent thought, but rather through what is considered normative by law. Essentially, “marriage is not an instinct but an institution.” (Berger 1963, 88) because it is enabled and promoted by virtue of the law. In addition, many couples believe in
Marriage is a commitment that seems to be getting harder to keep. The social standards placed on an individual by society and influenced by the media inevitably lead some to consider divorce as a “quick-fix” option. “Have it your way” has become a motto in the United States. It has become a country without any consideration of the psychological effects of marriage and divorce. The overwhelmingly high divorce rate is caused by a lack of moral beliefs and marital expectations.
Inside the article “Why Marriage is Good for You”, Maggie Gallagher makes claims that marriage improves many facets of an individual’s life; including both mental and physical health, longevity, finances, and reduced chances of infidelity (Gallagher). The statements made throughout the article reference many statistics and studies conducted by various organizations and individuals, however, Gallagher falls victim to a number of common logical fallacies. While this weakens Gallagher’s argument in the article, it does not necessarily make it false.
Marriage can be a frightening thing for anyone. The act of marriage can bring fear such as commitment, as well as fears associated with living together and sharing everything. This, in turn, can lead to one or both parties feeling vulnerable. A common approach to calm these fears and vulnerabilities is cohabitation. For many, cohabitation can seem as a transition period for couples to adjust to living with each other before marriage. In fact, cohabitation is becoming quite the norm in the United States. Huang, Smock, Manning, and Lynch (2011) state that “clearly, cohabitation has become a customary part of the American courtship process” and that it “has been increasing markedly in the United States over the past few decades.” In this paper, we will explore the reasoning behind cohabitation, and discuss the advantages and disadvantages.
The more you get to know someone, the more you are able to make better decisions and judgments for not just yourself, but for your partner as well. How a couple handles issues while
The long-term success of marriage is measured by how effective and efficient individual couples exchange and express their feeling not only to address the problem that might arise but most important how they resolve it through
The debate on whether to get married or stay single has been raging for a long while, with both sides of the coin having their own pros and cons regarding the matter. Many proponents of either marriage or single life have strong individual convictions, and it is difficult to reach a definitive, objective conclusion. Is the married individual happier than his/her single counterpart, or is getting married just a comfort seeking ritual that people believe they have to fulfill at some point in their lives? It is necessary to dissect this issue in the light of four factors: health and other medical factors, the economic and financial factors, mental and emotional wellbeing and lastly, the social factors. According to Webster’s dictionary, the definition of Married is “the state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law”.
“Relationships are what make up our world today, they shape the ways we see things and the way that we do things, relationships affect how we see the world today.” I believe supporting what your partner does, having a great sum of trust and showing your affections towards your partner is what will make a healthy relationship great.
As humans, we are constantly building relationships with others and meeting new people, but sometimes it 's hard to maintain a relationship with another person, when only one person is engaged in it. All healthy relationships or friendships should be based upon the concepts of caring, supporting, and spending time with each other, and if one person is not able to provide these concepts towards the other person, then the relationship quickly becomes one-sided.
Marriage: It’s one of the most desired systems on the planet, yet it is still one of the most misunderstood ideas known to mankind. The definition of being in matrimony has evolved with time, and through the years society has been seemingly reluctant to such changes. From the end of anti-miscegenation laws to the legalization of interracial marriage, society has grown to understand the importance the choice of getting married has on the individual. As of now, the right of matrimony is given to all but one group of Americans.