Definition Essay Jealousy

Are You Jealous or Just Insecure?

Is this jealousy really about that girl your boyfriend is talking to, or is it actually about you? Jealousy is commonly looked at as an everyday thing that is dealt with by young lovers or even celebrities becoming envious or fearful. In this essay I would like to show the true definition of the word jealousy.This definition should be evaluated more closely to find its true meaning and I believe that it will change the outlook of people everywhere. Jealousy isn’t just being envious of someone, it is unnecessary insecurity with yourself. In this essay I will explain why this feeling is so pointless in our everyday lives. Once we focus this notion back onto ourselves, we find the real issue.

One example that almost all of us can relate to is, of course, being jealous of your boyfriend/ girlfriend talking to another boy/girl. On paper this may sound like a petty thing to be upset about, but you realize just how common it really is once it finally happens to you. In your head, you understand that you have nothing to be worried about, while another part of you is imagining everything that could happen. “What if he starts to like

her more than me?” “I wonder what they're talking about.” “I always knew she liked him” These thoughts circle your mind until you find out that they were actually talking about you.
The issue that happens when you become jealous is that your brain starts to question everything that was previous to said jealousy.

“Am I as beautiful as she is?” “Does he even really like me?” You may have been confident about these answers twenty minutes ago but now your whole outlook is warped. Looking back at these moments, we realize that the only problem with the situation is that you started to second guess yourself and become insecure with yourself and your relationship with that person. On the other end, your partner has no comprehension of what is happening in your head, so when you become upset because of this jealousy, they turn defensive, trying to argue that they weren’t doing anything wrong. When all you see is all of the bad things that could happen, it is almost like you are turning

blind.
Why do we start to doubt ourselves? The answer is fairly simple, we do not value ourselves as much as we value each other. Our thoughts are usually quite similar, in that, we are always thinking of ourselves as not being good enough for the other person, and if you don’t feel this way then your partner probably does. In reality we should all feel confident in the person that we are and should not have to worry about getting dumped all of the time. It takes time to build up this confidence within yourself and only then can you start a relationship. The saying is true, “You can’t love another person if you can’t even love yourself.”
Jealousy could be easily compared to drunk glasses. You could see fine before you put them on and the whole world was very clear to you, but once those shades are over your eyes, everything's different. You think that you are seeing things that aren’t actually there, which causes you to react in an irrational manner. After the public understands the revised definition of jealousy, it will be as if we have taken off those drunk glasses and we will all start to see things so much clearer.
Language changes over time and can have a completely different meaning than it was suppose to. For example,, people may think that jealousy is “suppose to happen.” After thousands of years of people feeling this envy towards others, we think that it is okay for us to feel that way too. The only problem is that the previous meaning is no longer relevant. We should be looking at the person who is actually feeling this way rather than the partner. It seems that people have had trouble doing these things in the past. Though once the public understands the true definition which encapsulates both the old and the new, I believe they will change their idea of this term.
The previous meaning of jealousy was to be envious of a rival or someone more successful than yourself. This feeling can creep up on anyone and is said to be the norm of today’s society. Because the definition, no longer holds the same meaning, it should not be used. In truth, these “green-eyed monsters” should not be so common. If we were to record how many times in a day that we feel an animosity towards someone else, we would be shocked. It is frankly unhealthy to have these thoughts in a our minds so often.
The new definition that I will be going into more detail with, encases both the old meaning, but with a little bit more that is needed. This new meaning of jealousy is: an unneeded feeling of envy towards someone else, or unnecessary insecurity with one’s self. Being jealous is this day and age, is supposedly a common trait in people everywhere, but if we look at this new summary, we find that it shouldn’t be this common. With this new understanding of the word jealousy, people will find themselves improving their lives.
In my opinion, with jealousy having such a negative connotation, if we were to eliminate it altogether, it would be for the best. Though this would be incredibly stress relieving, it is almost impossible to become a non-envious person. If we were to complete this impossible feat, there is no telling how many things this might improve in our everyday lives. This essay may not be able to change the minds of everyone who knows the feeling of envy, but if it were to just change even one mind, it would make a huge difference.
After people understand and begin to use the new definition of jealousy, they will most likely see an improvement in their relationships and even friendships. In conclusion, the problem with jealousy is not the other person that you are envious of, it is about yourself and why you are insecure with yourself or your relationship. If people start to look in the mirror before they blame their problems on anything else, they will see a huge improvement. So if you are ever feeling that jealousy run through you, tell yourself “It’s not them, it’s me.”