Conflict In Conflict And The Four Types Of Conflict

Goals are defined as, “what does each person want” (Wilmot & Hocker, 2011, p.72) Goals can also so be viewed as, and end or desired result. In regards to goals, we often try to reach and accomplish goals in our relationships. However, we often don’t achieve these goals due to existing conflicts, poor communication, or conflict styles.

An ongoing conflict between two parties can be very difficult to handle, especially, when you are dealing with someone who chooses not to acknowledge the conflict. There is an ongoing power struggle based within this conflict, when the other party is taking part in avoidance. Because of that, reaching or achieving your ultimate goal of conflict resolution becomes quite difficult. There are four types of goals

Power in conflict may be “designated (power given by your position), distributive (either/or power), and integrative (both/power).” (Wilmot & Hocker, 2011, p.103) My current boss is considered as designated power or when I was a retail store manager. Wilmot and Hocker explain, “Distributive power is over or against the other party.”(Wilmot & Hocker, 2011, p. 102) Ultimately, I have the power to forgive my mother without her needing to apologize and simply moving on. Integrative power focuses on “(both/and) both parties have to achieve something in the relationship” (Wilmot & Hocker, 2011, p. 102). Both my mom and, I must achieve forgiveness towards the other. Power can be at the core of conflict in a relationship. When there is an expressed struggle, within the relationship power is often times at its

I learned from completing the “Assessing my Conflict Style” journal assignment that; my overall conflict style is compromise and my mother’s is avoidance. In the conflict, with my mother and myself, I noticed that I’m always the one that’s saying, ok mom I see that you don’t want to talk about our issues. Then, I suggest we communicate our issues at a different time and place, we both agree and it ends there. Needless to say, that is definitely a disadvantage of my compromising conflict style. I end up not getting what I want, which is to have the conversation while, my mother is satisfied because we don’t have the dreaded conversation. This is always the case, with my mother’s avoidance conflict style we never get anywhere. Nonetheless. I’m hopeful because, now she knows that I have been hurting for an extended period of time. I believe it would be beneficial for our conflict if I began to work more on using additional conflict styles. If I, will allow myself to be more accommodating and recognizing that resolving this conflict is not easy for my mother either. I must learn that at times my needs may be secondary, in that moment to possibly make any progress. My mother may be avoiding the issues because she doesn’t quite know how to deal with them. I also recognize that collaborating with my mother and working to find an agreeable solution to