Break Up Conversation Analysis

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This was a great book for me, because I get very awkward when it comes to conversations that are out of my comfort zone. I start to sweat, my heart starts to beat at what feels like 90 mph, and I begin to feel nauseous. I tend to stay away from any difficult conversation as much as I possibly can. I even stay in relationships because I hate have that “we need to talk” break up conversation. It is funny because whenever I am in a difficult conversation I do not know how to stay still. I will fidget, I bounce and shake, and I tend to tell jokes at the most inappropriate times. For a while I thought that I was the only one who had this problem; but it turns out I am not alone everyone hates that conversations that make them uneasy hence “difficult …show more content…

Talking about feelings is something that I hate doing with a passion. When it comes to me and my feelings I tend to just vent and not hear what the other person has to say and I know that is a point that I must work on. I must learn how not to vent but describe what I am feeling. When dealing with the feelings conversation there are quite a few questions we ask ourselves. “Are my feelings valid? Should I acknowledge or deny them? Put them at the table or check them at the door? What about the other person’s feelings? What if they are angry or hurt?” (Stone, D., Patton, B., & Heen p. …show more content…

It gave me a whole new perspective on conflict and how to handle it in all different types of relationships. I found the sections about family and love relationships to be the most interesting because I can relate to those two sections because it gave me great insight to things that were happening in my life currently. For instance, I never knew that a child could have PTSD from witnessing domestic violence. I have never been in a domestic violence situation, but I am a big advocate of women and children. I know many people who have been victims to domestic violence. Reading this book was very helpful because the shows the elements of conflict and explains them. I learned the difference between productive and destructive conflicts. Destructive conflicts are those where the parties are unhappy with the outcomes and feel that they have lost. Destructive conflicts often escalate and destroy relationships. Productive conflicts leave the parties feeling satisfied. Productive conflicts involve creating a collaborative transformation of the elements of the conflict. I also learned about the different styles of conflict. The competitive style is aggressive and uncooperative, focused on winning. The collaborative style intermixes confidence in chasing your own goals with respect and concern for the other person’s goals. I learned that I am sometimes a Non-aggressive person due to the fact I usually try to avoid conflict. I tend to accommodate the

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