Being a mother is hard enough as it is; motherhood in the midst of navigating a racism and unequal society sounds downright impossible. Yet, this is the reality of today’s black, single moms in the United States who are expected to meet the extensive criteria of the intensive mothering ideology amid systematic barriers and societal inequalities. In Sinikka Elliott’s “Being a Good Mom: Low-Income, Black Single Mothers Negotiate Intensive Mothering”, black, single mothers were interviewed and the importance of sacrifice, self-reliance, and protection revealed to be prominent themes within their parenting. The intensive mothering ideology ranks moms as “expert” caregivers and expects them to sacrifice greatly for their children, to represent independence and self-reliance for their children to model, and to protect their kids at …show more content…
Adrianna’s motivation to protect her children from endemic racism, discrimination, and violence pushed her to home-school them, ultimately taking a huge toll on her own well-being in an effort to meet the expectations of the intensive mothering ideology. Millicent’s overprotective tendencies from losing one of her daughters to the state put a major strain on her relationship with her children, and she struggled to balance the societal expectations of her as a parent in the face of poverty and abuse. All three of these women's stories shed light on the inequalities embedded within the intensive mothering ideology that is ultimately not conducive and harmful to low-income, black single mothers. Sinikka Elliott’s “Being a Good Mom: Low-Income, Black Single Mothers Negotiate Intensive Mothering” was tremendously eye opening for me, which allowed me to better understand my own personal experiences and sympathize with the many mothers who have been forced into this
It is a rare occurrence indeed to stumble upon a nonfiction article as raw and true as “The Myth of Co-Parenting: How It Was Supposed to Be. How It Was.” by Hope Edelman. The author of three nonfiction books, who has had her work published in the New York Times, the Chicago Tribune, the San Francisco Chronicle, and Seventeen magazine, writes about her expectations regarding an egalitarian marriage with equal parenting responsibilities, and compares them to the reality that comes from living in a household where both parents work full-time and cannot drop all of their responsibilities to care for a toddler. Edelman’s narrative is a flippant view on modern views of feminist relationships, from both the side of the feminist and the side of a woman whose marriage did not reflect those ideals. While she argues everyday gender roles, she may reach a deeper topic than just the sexes assigned roles of being either a nurturer or a provider, but never both. She mentions late in the article that the two
In our society of today, there are many images that are portrayed through media and through personal experience that speak to the issues of black motherhood, marriage and the black family. Wherever one turns, there is the image of the black woman in the projects and very rarely the image of successful black women. Even when these positive images are portrayed, it is almost in a manner that speaks to the supposed inferiority of black women. Women, black women in particular, are placed into a society that marginalizes and controls many of the aspects of a black woman’s life. As a result, many black women do not see a source of opportunity, a way to escape the drudgery of their everyday existence. For example, if we were to ask black mother’s if they would change their situation if it became possible for them to do so, many would change, but others would say that it is not possible; This answer would be the result of living in a society that has conditioned black women to accept their lots in lives instead of fighting against the system of white and male dominated supremacy. In Ann Petry’s The Street, we are given a view of a black mother who is struggling to escape what the street symbolizes. In the end though, she becomes captive to the very thing she wishes to escape. Petry presents black motherhood, marriage and the black family as things that are marginalized according to the society in which they take place.
When Dyk is explaining poverty of the poor rural Southern Black Women, she also says that, “You will be encouraged by their strength and resiliency.” (Dyk178). This means that even though some women have to prostitute themselves and face domestic as well as community violence, they keep on trying to find different ways to earn, so that they can feed their children and give them a better life. Similarly, Coontz presents it in a different way and call it economic independence. One of the reasons why divorce rates are high now, is because women are economically independent because they are educated. They did used to earn in the past, but now they have control over their income and they don’t put up with things like men abusing them or domestic violence; this shows that women have become stronger economically and emotionally as compared to how they were in the past. Those who criticize women for working and not spending time with their children, Coontz states that, “Kids do better when their mothers are happy with their lives.” (Coontze98).
Keeping with the legacy of American history, the African American family is a topic of controversy and concern. While other aspects of the family are studied, it could be argued that the area of African American motherhood receives the most attention. Unequivocally, African American mothers are depicted as matriarchs, crack-mothers, and welfare queens. In addition, Black mothers are often portrayed as lazy, irresponsible, destructive, and even worthless. These stereotypical images of African American mothers are important because they have powerful implications for African American moms, and for their families at large.
This book is a study of the personal tales of many single mothers, with intentions to understand why single mothers from poor urban neighborhoods are increasingly having children out of wedlock at a young age and without promise of marrying their fathers. The authors chose to research their study in Philadelphia’s eight most devastated neighborhoods, where oppression and danger are high and substantial job opportunities are rare. They provide an excellent education against the myth that poor young urban women are having children due to a lack of education on birth control or because they intend to work the welfare system. Instead, having children is their best and perhaps only means of obtaining the purpose, validation and companionship that is otherwise difficult to find in the areas in which they live. For many of them, their child is the biggest promise they have to a better future. They also believe that though their life may not have been what they want, they want their child to have more and better opportunities and make it their life’s work to provide that.
In society black women are no longer represented as the nurturing, protective, loving, and caring mother, no...
The third article goes over the problems in organizing black feminists while the fourth article goes over black feminist issues and practice. In the third article, the author explains how they not only have to fight just one oppression, rather than a whole range of oppressions. The fourth section goes over the idea of equality between white women and black women. The black women strive to allow the white women to see things from their point of view and are attempting to allow others to have an idea of how much racism there truly is for them. Overall, this book explains the experiences that black feminists faced from their own
When it comes to parenting styles, there is a clear distinction and gap between African-Americans and white American families. These practices are stemmed from historical and cultural traditions that are passed from one generation to another. Pregnancy, child-rearing, and parenting techniques between black and white people are significantly affected by various social and economic factors.
In a poverty stricken neighbourhood, it is expected that residents will be too busy with their own survival that they will not be willing to cooperate with each other. This, however, is untrue as many high-crime neighbourhoods are not disorganized and actually have strong networks of social ties, as observed in the Robert Taylor Homes. A study of the structure of the black family in the eighties show that there is a phenomenal growth in the number of black families maintained exclusively by women (Nichols-Casebolt, 1988). But while these numbers are growing, the amount of formal help available to black single mothers is not; it is almost non-existent (Edin & Lein, 1997). As a result, residents in the housing projects informally organize, with the understanding of a shared experience, in an attempt to survive against poverty. During his interviews with community members, Venkatesh (2008) notes that,
Harris, Kathleen. “Work and Welfare Among Single Mothers in Poverty.” The American Journal of Sociology. Vol. 99 Sept. 1993. 317-52.
Black women's experiences and those of other women of color have never fit the private -public model. Rather than trying to explain why Black women's work and family patterns deviate from the alleged norm, a more fruitful approach lies in challenging the very constructs of work and families themselves. ("Native")
African American motherhood differs from White and privileged motherhood because of slavery and the standards society holds for African- American’s. During slavery, Black women took care of their own children until they were taken from them, and care for other’s children that were sold into slavery and separated from their families. Although slavery is over, the effects of slavery linger in various forms, the most surprising: motherhood. I will draw my research from Patricia Hill Collins, the author of Black Women and Motherhood, and Shifting the Center: Race, Class, and Theorizing about Motherhood. In this paper, I will briefly highlight the history of black motherhood whilst weighing on the lasting trauma that affects these women today.
American families are becoming more diverse every day. The merging ethnic diversity in our country is becoming more apparent daily as we see different people of different cultures becoming involved with each other. America is a melting pot. The influx of immigrants and with their varied cultural backgrounds was essential in molding America’s identity. The United States became a refuge for all those suffering persecution for political or personal beliefs. America has become a shelter for a wide variety of faiths and beliefs.
... boundaries of poverty. It would still take Ma a couple of years of hard work and dedication before getting out of Southie, but never as long as it took her in the nineteen hundreds. The truth is that single mother’s face far more challenges than marry couples with kids do, especially when combating dangers, crime, and poverty. According to the statistics released by The Urban Institute of Washington, “single-mother households become poor at a rate of 15.7 percent a year, compared with just 2.8 percent for married-parent households” (Ribar and Hamrick). However, it is proven by studies and statistics that the United States is slowly reducing its poverty rate by increasing the funding of services and institutions that help low income families; therefore, it is believable that in present years, Ma would be able to get out of Southie much faster than she did in 1990.
Women have persistently been challenged with issues regarding what it means to be a ‘good mother’. Although times continue to change, issues confronting 21st century mothers, remain similar to the ones addressed in past generations. An abundance of mothers in the 21st century are still faced with the complex issue regarding the ‘stay-at-home mom’ stereotype, in spite of the fact that the feminist movement has provided women with more rights in the present-day, then ever before. However, while strides have been made, these changes have had an affect on society’s notion of motherhood. The portrayal of motherhood is determined by countless expectations in which society has established. Such expectancies have expanded, which now effect how motherhood is depicted in different cultures. As a whole the feminist movement has strongly influenced Western Society, which has resulted in women’s suffrage, the right to make individual decisions, and has also led to wide-ranging employment for women at more equivalent wages. However, the emergence of female employment has created a war between ‘stay-at-home’ and ‘working’ mothers, which is often referred to as ‘Mommy Wars’. In addition, female employment provides men with the opportunity to stay at home and become the primary caregiver, which has ultimately had a large impact on societies notion of motherhood, treating them differently than primary caregivers of the opposite gender. This paper will examine how the feminist movement has altered societies notion of motherhood in the 21st century in comparison to past generations as a result of working mothers and stay at home fathers.