Active Listening

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Active listening is a form of communication skill that allows people to understand, comprehend, and have compassion for each other. To be a good listener, one must “actively process information, make pertinent comments, and ask relevant questions” (Brent and Anderson 123). The person must make a conscious effort to hear not only the words that another person is saying but, more importantly, try to understand the complete message being sent. One must be engaged in the conversation, avoiding listening barriers such as premature judgment, biases and prejudices, physical and mental distractions, and lack of appropriate focus. This allows for improved relationships, problem resolution, increased cooperation, and intimacy building.

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It started out as a political conversation which turned into a full blow argument about me not listening to her. I had to pull the reigns back on the conversation, otherwise we would be going to bed angry at each other. I knew I had to either end the conversation or just make her think she was correct. After all, a happy wife is a happy life right? In this case, active listening is important in all situations where people are communicating with each other. According to the National Communication Association, “effective communication is critical to achieving high quality personal relationships” (36). Listening is an emotional skill that is a lot harder than engaging in counter-complaints when your partner lists her/his complaints. It is best to be aware of your intentions and why the relationship is important to you. You must show that you are engaged and interested in what your partner has to say. It entails paying attention to your own and your partner's body language. Eye contact is especially important to show you care. Reading your partner's body language can give you clues as to how she/he feels. When my mind was wandering, my facial expressions started to show. I gave my wife almost a blank stare which she noticed almost instantly. She was able to gauge that I was no longer paying attention to what she had to say. I was hearing her talk but did not comprehend what noises were coming out of her

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