Effective Listening
Teresa Allen
Western International University
Human Relations and Communication
COM-423-3277
Mollie Surgine
November 20, 2017 Effective Listening
In all aspects in life effective listening plays an important role in our lives, both professionally and personally. As many of know from experience listening is never easy in fact it can be difficult to understand what is being said by the speaker. Because of laps in attention we tend to misunderstand some of the messages that are being relayed to us or disregard them altogether. Effective listening is important for receiving the correct feedback from those you’re speaking with and requires a focus that should be central to what is being said or what topic is being discussed.
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Effectively listening not only helps me to understand others but has allowed me to give appropriate feedback when needed. To listen is critical because there are certain instructions a supervisor may be delivering verbally and to be a good employee to understand what is being said helps improve performance as a worker. Effective listening in the work place has also allowed me to learn how to maintain eye contact while speaking to the employer or a co-worker. In all aspects eye contact is a way to show the speaker that my attention is focused on what he or she is saying and having an understanding of the context. According Joseph A. DeVito 2012), listening effectively requires the skills to be understood and communicate effectively. We can only foster aid to others only if we apply ourselves to effective …show more content…
As we all know the world can throw us some curves and change the course one may expect in their life. Listening to what others are saying is to help them in some way or another. As a counselor my goal is to apply myself as an effective listener because it’s required and if my listening skills are not up to par, then there is no reason to be in that field profession. There was a time when a friend was relying on me to listen to a problem she was having in her marriage, instead of listening my reaction was “you need a marriage counselor” she then became disappointed because my focus wasn’t on what she was saying instead my focus was on what she didn’t say and only then was my response would have been given. This to me was a mental distraction because the focus was on what my reply would have been instead of what she was actually saying to me. Listening mindfully requires us to be completely aware of what is being said and why, it is here we an understanding can be made clear (Hall D. 2017). A person who is sharing openness is most always appreciated and valued over closed mindedness in both face to face communication and online (Joseph A. DeVito 2012). Over the course of my own life there have been many occasions where effective listening was required, academically, emotionally, mentally and on a support level of
Listening is a vital and important part of communication. While speaking clearly and concisely is imperative, true listening is central to speaking with mindfulness and in the case of the counselor, this mindfulness has the possibility of leading clients to their own solutions to life’s tough circumstances. In his book, Petersen (2007) breaks down the communication cycle so that we can be aware of how we react when people share their emotions with us, and how to effectively communicate by listening and speaking in turn to build strong and supportive relationships, whether they are personal or professional.
Stickley, T., & Freshwater, D. (2006). The art of listening in the therapeutic relationship. Mental Health Practice, 9 (5), 12-18.
Most of us think that we listen well, but we don’t. Not really hearing what others are trying to say can get costly. When people don’t feel heard they tend to get irritated, confused, and pull away from each other. In the book, “Why Don’t We Listen Better?” Petersen describes in detail communication in five sections. Petersen’s communication consists of two people who connect on a gut level through a respectful talking and listening interaction. One person takes the role of the talker and his or her goal is to share his or her thoughts and feelings. The other person takes the role of the listener and clarifies what the talker says in a safe and understanding environment.
Communication in all relationship can be successful when our listener get the message that we want to convey and it is not so much about what we want to say. Listening is a unique process because it involves psychological and voluntary process that goes beyond simply reacting to sounds. It includes understanding, analyzing, evaluating, and responding. As a human, we will use different listening styles, depending on our preferences and purposes. Listening styles refer to the different ways people listen and analyze the content of a conversation. Usually, these styles either have to do with the way listeners choose to receive the message or with how they analyze the message. Listening is very important because we listen in order to establish and communicate power. There are few types of listening that can be used in order to communicate effectively.
I have found that whole heartedly listening is a very important step to communicating. Listening to give a verbal response is not what communication is about. Listening is important to understand someone and their situation in order to help them and respond well. Listening is a part of being open-minded. I hope to continue to learn to communicate with others in a way that I can listen to them properly and be open-minded to their ideas that are different than mine. Occasionally others have ideas that I would never have thought of and being open to other ideas and trying the ideas of those around me can help lead to a better experience.
It is very important to listen and pay attention because as a Counselor you do not want to miss out on any important information that can help determine the root of the problem. I also find that being a good listener is one of my strengths as well as being compassionate, open-minded, and sympathetic. I overcame many personal hardships in my life, and because of those hardships I am a stronger person, with a positive outlook on life that can help make a difference in someone. One of my personal characteristics that I feel that I need to improve on is that I become too emotionally involved because I care about those I will work with. I want to be able to do my job without my emotions getting in the way. The best way to do that is to learn strategies and techniques to help me improve. I am willing to learn and work hard to make sure I become a qualified professional for this
Theoretical According to listening expert and researcher Dr. Ralph Nichols, "The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them”. Listening, as Nichols points out, is both necessary and an integral aspect of the communication process and is one of the most important skills one can acquire. Although critically important in everyday and professional affairs, the specific skill of effectively listening unfortunately is lacking in most people.
As The Gift of Listening describes, “Opening one’s heart and listening at a deep level does not come easily and is rarely achieved simply by life experience” (Browning & Waite, 2010, p. 151) There are different aspects to being a good listener that are often difficult to achieve and lead to poor listening. One significant challenge to listening is the attention needed in order to actively listen to another person. Proper listening does not occur due to a passive process but instead it takes deliberate action and thought towards what a person in saying. Like previously stated, actively listening is achieved by sitting in a comfortable and open way and maintaining good eye contact. When a person does not exhibit these techniques good listening often does not occur. The challenge of utilizing different techniques in order to listen to others in a better way often gets blocked by barriers that make active listening unable to occur. In our society today one major barrier to listening is technology. In a casual setting, proper listening often doesn’t occur due to someone being tied to their cell phone. The millennial generation is often guilty of passively listening to others due to the mobile technology that is being used today. Many conversations occur without eye contact or full focus on what the other has to say and instead is spent staring at a
Listening is a behavioral skill that takes practice and it can be lost if not used regularly. In early years, listening is taught, a way to show respect with undivided attention to the person who is speaking. But a good listener is someone who takes time to respond with an empathetic response, despite the mood of the speaker and ask questions to keep the conversation going. A good listener comes with certain qualities like empathetic, caring, and attentive. Listening is not used as a way to connect with people and sustain relationships, it is used for simple tasks; today, listening is affected by selective attention, digital distraction, and simply
Listening and understanding what others communicate to us is the communication process needed for interpersonal effectiveness. If you listen well, you will understand the meaning of the message. If you are unfocused, you will not know most of what the other person is saying. However, there is a range of listening skills that can be learned to develop the communication effectiveness. Firstly, encouraging listening points to the listener that is willing to do more than listen. Usually it provides feedback that supports speakers to say more. Fur...
Those not thoroughly educated in communication tend to confuse the terms “hearing” and “listening.” Although they appear to mean the same thing, utilize the same body part, and are both required for functional communication, there is a great difference between these two actions. Hearing involves the perception of sound using the ears, while listening is based upon giving attention to the sound being perceived. Additionally, because these concepts are different, there are also several different ways of improving hearing and listening. Thus, there are several differences between these two concepts, and it is important to signify these differences in order to practice effective communication.
In terms of my listening strengths, I do a good job at making and maintaining eye contact with people. Specifically, this helps me stay focused and listen to what the person speaking is saying. I do not become distracted with external factors and pay attention to the person and the conversation. I think that eye contact is important because it gives a non-verbal message that you are listening and are hearing what is being said. This listening skill occurs daily; whether it be in a meeting where I am introduced or talking to a client, in class listening to my professor, or at home with my family.
TOEFL Listening may sound like an easy section, but you need to pay attention to some short conversations and answer a few questions on them. TOEFL Listening is often challenging because it require test takers to remember facts and then answer questions on specific information mentioned in the recording. In order to ace TOEFL listening section, candidates need to know exactly what type of questions they will see in the TOEFL listening test. If you have known the TOEFL listening test format, it will help you plan your study accordingly and score high.
To be effective listeners, the listening process should be incorporated into our lives. We should be attentive to what people say, clarify what the speaker is trying to come across, and respond in a way the speaker can understand what we are saying. I think I was aware that I needed some improvement in certain areas of this process but I feel as everything is slowly changing. In the future, I’m going try not to interrupt people, get distracted, tune out, and try to get a bigger picture of what the person is telling me. If good listening habits are applied in our day-to-day life, we can easily communicate with anyone and everyone.
One of the main aspects in communicating is listening. An effective listener is one who, not only comprehends how the speaker feels but, also understands what they are stating. Building a strong connection between the speaker and the listener is one of the first steps to become a good listener. By building this connection speakers should first be in an environment with open minded listeners, it makes them feel more comfortable to state their opinions, feelings and ideas. Listeners should avoid being judgmental. The individual does not have to agree with the ideas, values or opinions of the speaker; however, to fully understand them, one must put aside their criticism. Speakers will believe that they can trust the listeners with their information when they know that they will not be judged. Miscommunication happens frequently, listene...