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It hit me like a bullet. I was in shock for the first 10 minutes. No words. The only sound I could hear was crying and sobbing and deep breaths. The only thing on anyone’s mind was how to get over the fact that our mom, wife, or grandma had died. I remember the nervousness I had when my dad said I had to be home that instant. They should have been on their anniversary trip but they were back. I couldn’t figure out why but I knew it was something big. I knew that my grandma had cancer and my grandpa was very sick. That’s all I could think about. Not any good things, just what if one of them were dead. I got back to my house and my dad took my bag. He said listen very carefully and know that it’s okay to cry. I said alright and that’s when I felt like I had died inside. When I say it hit me like a bullet I mean it actually felt like someone had shot me. It was more painful than when I broke my ankle. I stood there refusing to believe that she was dead. All the time I had to fight that thought was 10 minutes. By that time I was at my grandparents house and was greeted by crying relatives. …show more content…
My goal is not to forget about it and move on but to find a new normal.
My old normal was seeing my grandma almost every day. Every saturday I was in the same booth at mcdonalds with me and her on one side and my cousin and grandpa on the other. That next day I was at church with her. Getting to hear her sing and do a little tiny dance was the highlight of my day. The barrier that is holding me back is all the times I did things with her before. But I know that I will never not be sad about it so that’s why my number one goal is to find a new
normal. To accomplish this goal and find a new normal I will be using commitment, determination, and persistence. I will have to stay committed to my goal and once I find my new normal I will need to stay committed to doing things the new way. I will have to stay determined to find a new normal. I know in my search for a new normal I will need to stay determined and not change my mind when it gets hard. I know that I will recover a lot of precious memories and I have to keep going and not try to go back to the way it used to be. That would be pointless because it can’t be the way it used to be. And I will have to stay persistent in my new normal. I will have to stick to my new way without my grandma to help me along. I can’t just quit because life gets hard. My goal is to find a new normal and I will need Jackie’s values of commitment, determination, and persistence to accomplish that goal. I will need to stay committed to doing things the new way. I will need to stay determined to finding a new normal. And I will need to be persistent and keep going when things get hard.
At Ten P.m on September 23, 2006, my mother Kelli Elizabeth Dicks was hit by a car on Route 146 southbound trying to cross the high speed lane. She was being picked up by a friend. Instead of taking the exit and coming to the other side of the highway, her ride suggested she run across the street. The impact of the car caused her to be thrown 87 feet away from the original impact zone and land in a grassy patch of land, her shoes stayed where she was hit. She was immediately rushed to Rhode Island Hospital where she was treated for serious injuries. When she arrived at the hospital she was rushed into the operating room for an emergency surgery. The amount of injuries she sustained were unbelievable. She broke 18 different bones, lacerated her liver and her spleen, ruptured her bladder, and she collapsed both lungs. When she went in for her emergency operation, and had her
When I walked inside the front door something didn’t seem right. The feeling of sorrow overwhelmed the house. It was so thick I could literally feel it in the air. Everyone was motionless. They were sulking;I was befuddled. The most energetic people in the world, doing absolutely nothing. I repeatedly asked them what was wrong. After an hour or so, my dad pulled me aside. He said that my Aunt Feli had passed away last night. My mind went for a loop, I was so confused. I thought that he was joking, so I replied “You’re lying, don’t mess with me like that.” and punched his shoulder softly while I chuckled. My dad quickly started tearing up and said, “There...
My first experience with death as a child happened when I was eleven years old. My grandfather passed away in his sleep from heart failure. I had spent that night at a girlfriends, when I came home I asked my father where my mother was. He replied simply that my grandfather had passed and she was with my grandmother. It was not discussed any further and I went to my room where I awaited my mothers return. My mother proceeded to explain what happened. I was more concerned with her well being than the death itself. At the time I knew what death was. I had a fascination with death as a child, it was something that greatly interested me. My grandfather had a very traditional funeral. I was very timid and curious at the viewing. I felt uncomfortable
I figured someone had passed away, but I didn't think much of it. My father spoke to me in a very calm and soft voice with tears in his eyes. In between his words you could hear the hurt. He told me that my godmother had passed away. I sat there not knowing what to say, but could feel the hurt overwhelm me.
This is crazy. Why am I afraid? I’m acting as if this is my first funeral. Funerals have become a given, especially with a life like mine, the deaths of my father, my uncle and not my biological mother, you would think I could be somewhat used to them by now. Now I know what you’re thinking, death is all a part of life. But the amount of death that I’ve experienced in my life would make anyone cower away from the thought. This funeral is nothing compared to those unhappy events.
while, being as he was rushing to Cooper Hospital to see my mother. At this
It was July 22nd when I got the phone call that my great grandma was in the hospital. It was so shocking to me I didn’t even know what to think I had just been up there to see her two days ago prior to then. My dad had called me and told me in a calm but of course I know my dad to well to know that he was calm but actually pretty scared and frantic. I was at work and a perk to my job is that I work at a family owned business that is actually close to my family.
I cried in my room for hours wishing my dad would not go, a whole month without him seemed like the end of the world. I would have no one to play hockey with, no one to tuck me in at night and no one to eat donuts with every Friday. My dad tried to console me but I was too angry to listen to him, I suddenly hated my grandpa for causing my dad to leave me alone. At the airport my dad gave me a long hug and told me to be brave since I was now “the man of the house,” (even though I am a girl), I had to take care of my mom. Promptly this made me suck in my tears and stop acting like a “loser.” It was hard repressing my feelings, seeing my dad leave made my eyes tear severely but I held them back, the man of the house does not cry. Time went by faster when I was at school, I had less time to miss my dad. About two weeks later, my mom got a call from India, my grandpa had died. My mom broke down crying, she slammed the phone across the room into the wall. I felt scared to appr...
My father passed away in 1991, two weeks before Christmas. I was 25 at the time but until then I had not grown up. I was still an ignorant youth that only cared about finding the next party. My role model was now gone, forcing me to reevaluate the direction my life was heading. I needed to reexamine some of the lessons he taught me through the years.
My parents had go to Switzerland the week after for the funeral and the family. We had school going on and my parents decided to leave us with friends and go by their own. I stayed at a very good friend of mine, and my sister at one hers. They left and, where going to stay there at least a week. The time I spent there was really hard. Not only because the most helpful people I could have been with where away but I kept on having flashbacks.
No one was able to control their emotions. Everyone sobbed and uttered a few words here and there. No complete sentences were capable to be given due to the feeling that something was missing in their lives. It was definitely a different ambiance from the day before. The thought of my grandpa being gone had finally sinked into their minds.
Morning brought with it heavy rain. Even though it was raining, the funeral wasn't that bad; the man said lovely things about mother. About how it was a tragedy she had died so young, and how she died peacefully in her sleep, but I knew better. I had heard mother screaming that night, I can usually remember everything. Mother likes to call it ‘photographic memory’, but I think something bad must have happened to mother because I can’t remember.
Many of you may be wondering what that event was. I know not all of you have had this happen to you but for those of you who it has happen, you know that it stinks. What happened was that my beloved grandma passed away. Her passing wasn’t sudden, but it still shook me hard. I was filled with many sad emotions.
Two years and four months ago I died. A terrible condition struck me, and I was unable to do anything about it. In a matter of less than a year, it crushed down all of my hopes and dreams. This condition was the death of my mother. Even today, when I talk about it, I burst into tears because I feel as though it was yesterday. I desperately tried to forget, and that meant living in denial about what had happened. I never wanted to speak about it whenever anyone would ask me how I felt. To lose my Mom meant losing my life. I felt I died with her. Many times I wished I had given up, but I knew it would break the promise we made years before she passed away. Therefore, I came back from the dead determined and more spirited than before.
I'm embarrassed to say my second thought was that of relief when my mother called to say that he was dead. It had only been a short time, but I could never deal with someone being in pain or the thought of a machine keeping them from going to a better place. After all of his children, and a few extended family members had shown up and said their good byes, finally, it was over. In the past few years his health had been extraordinary. He always seemed to be in the best of health, one minute he would be out at the ranch helping a hand and the other minute he would be in his khaki pants and pin stripped polo shirt out on the golf coarse hoping for that hole in one. On that Tuesday afternoon I called my family to see if I should make the 13 hour puddle jumping flight across country for the funeral. Having the Satisfaction of being there to help comfort the rest of the family, was worth dealing with all the airport congestion as others would franticly push their way through crowds to get to their next flight.