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Importance of Family Values
Roles of gender in interpersonal communications
Importance of Family Values
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The following couple has been selected from This Blessed House, the seventh story of prizewinning collection. The exhibit story highlights the role of effective communication in the married life of an Indian newlyweds couple Sanjeev and Twinkle. They met each other just four months ago in California, through their parents and after a brief long-distance courtship they decided to live together for eternity. The young couple moves into a new house shortly after being wedded. As they try around investigating and fixing up the house, Twinkle’s gleeful possession with the Christian iconolatry left by previous tenants irks Sanjeev. The issue starts from here the middle of the two, as Sanjeev wants to toss the relics away, but Twinkle collects …show more content…
It made him feel stupid, as if the world contained hidden wonders he could not anticipate, or see”. (Lahiri 142).
The root of the clash between the couple is the crashing of their two exact different personalities and their inabilities to comprehend each other especially Sanjeev. Sanjeev is precise and self-cognizant of nature same time Twinkle similarly as her name infers is free spirited and very much fastidious. Sanjeev is unabated to express his disappointment with Twinkle‘s actions and silently adjusts to the situation. Even though Twinkle shows no enthusiasm toward household, Sanjeev is incapable to state his opinion or just communicate with her on these tiny matters. Sanjeev thinks: “They didn’t bother her, these scattered unsettled matters. She seemed content with whatever cloths she found at the front of the closet. With whatever magazine was lying around, with whatever song was on the radio-content yet
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He doubted whether he love Twinkle or not likewise she is quietly opposite of the girl Sanjeev wants to get married. This perception is quite common upon Indian husbands in different diaspora, whose majority expects the same from their wives. ―Women are expected to be docile homemakers. But their girlish charm may not be a quality an Indian husband in the diaspora may admire or tolerate in wives (Jain 2315). Twinkle‘s spontaneous and girl personality is mainly mirrored in her carelessness in the household and cooking. Twinkle was so self-obsessed and did never pay attention to his preferences and this cemented a wall between them. Twinkle‘s lack of sense for putting everything in the order and being too chaotic for Sanjev‘s only highlight his disappointment with her.
“Now, in the second month of their marriage, certain things nettled him—the way she sometimes spat a little when she spoke, or left her undergarments after removing them at night at the foot of their bed rather than depositing them in the laundry hamper”. (Lahiri
Essentially, to acquire a healthy marriage, a few keys to success are commitment, good communication skills, trust, and patience. Without these qualities, marriages can immerse in negativity which often leads to divorce. In Bobbie Ann Mason’s “Shiloh” and Raymond Carver’s “Cathedral”, a failing marriage seems to be the similar theme. Both short stories provide instabilities in their relationships and how they lack these fundamental qualities. In “Shiloh,” Leroy and Norma Jean deal with the loss of a child; the grief and unsupportive environment leaves their marriage questionable. In “Cathedral,” the nameless narrator becomes jealous when his wife, who is also nameless, invites an old friend Robert to stay the night after the visitor’s wife
Shyam’s idea of marriage is to keep a pretty wife, indulge in her wishful fancies and make her reliant on him. He does not want a confident woman as a wife. Radha and Shyam are mismatched in many ways and she feels suffocated in her marriage. She compares herself to the butterfly she wrapped up and stuck to a board as part of biology assignments in school and feels that her heart aches to fly somewhere departing from her husband. Shyam’s nature symbolizes the typical, Indian governing and trying to rule over every aspect of his wife’s life.
In the end, readers are unsure whether to laugh or cry at the union of Carol and Howard, two people most undoubtedly not in love. Detailed character developments of the confused young adults combined with the brisk, businesslike tone used to describe this disastrous marriage effectively highlight the gap between marrying for love and marrying for ?reason.? As a piece written in the 1950s, when women still belonged to their husbands? households and marriages remained arranged for class and money?s sake, Gallant?s short story excerpt successfully utilizes fictional characters to point out a bigger picture: no human being ought to repress his or her own desires for love in exchange for just an adequate home and a tolerable spouse. May everyone find their own wild passions instead of merely settling for the security and banality of that ?Other Paris.?
A major sign in “The Ceiling” is the lack of communication between the narrator and his wife, Melissa. An essential component in marriage is the ability to optimistically communicate between spouses; communication allows each spouse to effectively understand each other feelings toward various situations and circumstances. The lack of communication within “The Ceiling,” is noticeable as the narrator mentions “After we put Joshua to bed…across a divide” (Brockmeier, 96). When he tells her “You don’t look a day older than when we met, honey. You know that, don’t you?” and she answers with a “slight puff through her nose” that was a laugh, but he couldn’t tell what her expression was, as well as a slight “thank you” (Brockmeier, 95). Melissa exposes her lack of interest in this particular scene. This scene shows the evident miscommunication between both spouses as he mentions that h...
For being such a young girl Lakshmi’s life is anything but perfect. Living in a small village in Nepal, her family is not wealthy and her step father drinks and gambles what little money the family does have. Lakshmi as such a young age does not understand, however, Ama says “Even a man who gambles away what little we have on a fancy hat and a new coat, is better than no man at all” (McCormick 38). Lakshmi understands that her family has no money, a bad roof, and little food this weights heavy on her young soul. She tries very hard to keep it inside and not show Ama how this makes her sad. Even with all of this Lakshmi still finds a way to daydream, her and Ama find themselves daydreaming a lot. “Instead, we linger over a luxury that costs nothing” Imagining what may be,” for Ama and her daughter it is all they have (29). All Lakshmi wants to do is help her family do better for themselves and she will stop at nothing to get a tin roof for their hut.
A History of Marriage by Stephanie Coontz speaks of the recent idealization of marriage based solely on love. Coontz doesn’t defame love, but touches on the many profound aspects that have created and bonded marriages through time. While love is still a large aspect Coontz wants us to see that a marriage needs more solid and less fickle aspects than just love. The first chapter begins with an exploration of love and marriage in many ancient and current cultures.
Santha and the other school children are outside playing a version of tag. Santha let a,” small English boy,” catch her and was,” rather puzzled when the other children did not return the courtesy,” (46 Rau). At home she is used to being allowed to win because she is the youngest. It is part of her culture and thus it shapes her perspective so she is confused by the idea that other people will not just let her win. Later that week, when there was a test for Premilla, Santha’s older sister, Premilla runs into frustration and anger. As Premilla explains it to her mother later, she explains about the test being that day and how the Indians had to sit,” with a desk between each one,” of them because Premilla’s teacher believed that,” Indians cheat,” (48 Rau). Since Premilla was raised in an Indian home with an Indian culture she has been taught not to cheat. Being accused of cheating before even starting the test makes her frustrated because her culture influences her perception and her perception based on that culture says that cheating is bad so she should not do it. The teacher is British and so assumes otherwise based on the only what her culture has given her. Her limited cultural background gives her a limited perspective on Indians that affects her reactions and how she deals with the Indian children. Premilla sees what
In class there have been many discussions over the relationships and marriages among the books we have read. When someone thinks of marriage, a fairy tale with a happy ending might come to mind, or possibly a safe haven for those looking for something stable. In The Awakening by Kate Chopin, and “The Yellow Wallpaper” by Charlotte Perkins Gilman, marriage takes a turn for the worse. Marriage is no longer the happy memories in a lifetime. It can be the thing that hinders the women in these stories from developing their full potential or experiencing the world and other lifestyles. Through these texts and this time frame, we will analyze the meaning of their marriages, how they function, and the end result of both.
Mrs Kay firstly asks Carol why she does not and go and look round the
Both of these marriages may be unhappy but the cultural difference among them, which results into shattering the idea of Mr. kapashi’s friendship with Mrs. Das. Mr kapashi felt the cultural difference between him and Mrs. das was way to vast and hence he did not even wanted to think about having any further personal conversations. This teaches us how two entirely different people can carry one mutual heritage but being brought up into different cultures can be very different and UN mutual. Looking back in the story we realize and feel how important it is to keep our cultural believes when it comes to interact with different people as we are not only representing
The first difference between American culture and Indian culture is marriage. A wedding is a great social event in our society, which establish a new bond between two individuals and families. Marriage is a joyful occasion with plenty of music, dance, partying and merrymaking. It also brings together a long-lost friends, relatives and acquaintances. In India, the parents choose the mate for their child, which is called an arranged marriage. In most cases, the bri...
The story cuts back and forth between the housewarming party and the events leading up to it, and in the flashbacks Lahiri shows Sanjeev’s hesitations towards Twinkle - especially with her non-traditional mannerisms and values. It is the coworkers and friends of Sanjeev, however, that do not know Twinkle that are able to give a different impression of her. Prabal, a professor at Yale, tells Sanjeev that “‘[his] wife’s wow’”, to which Sanjeev gives him a blank stare followed by blushing. Sanjeev connects this comment with his past experiences in which “Prabal had pronounced that Sophia Loren was wow, as was Audrey Hepburn” (153). At first, the idea that Twinkle is “wow”, especially coming from someone Sanjeev would admire and look up to, completely stops and stuns him, and he is unsure how to react.
Of Sanjeev and Twinkle, Sanjeev is the one with the personality that craves order. Jhumpa Lahiri spends a great amount of time showing the reader just how much attention Sanjeev pays to organization and neatness. The reader is introduced to Sanjeev as he kneels “on the floor, marking, with ripped bits of Post-it, patches on the baseboard that needed to be retouched with paint” (Lahiri 53). A reader could take this seemingly exacting science of marking parts of the floor that need a touch-up as a normal activity for new owner of a home. Later in the story, however, Lahiri writes that Sanjeev organizes “his engineering texts from MIT in alphabetical order on a bookshelf…” (Lahiri 54) and works his way “methodically through the major composers that the catalogue recommended…” (Lahiri 60). Suddenly the innocuous Post-its and methodical way in which Sanjeev places them over the rough spots in the floor seem like an attempt to fix every small imperfection. Sanjeev keeps his life as orderly and precise as possible. He tries to control his life by controlling the things around him, such as arranging his books or following a list of composers, instead of choosing names at random.
Almost every culture around the world have the idea of bringing together households in marriage. In the United States, this a coupling of two people who will start a life on their own. In India, a marriage is more than two people falling and love and getting married. Family, religion and casts play a role for the future bride and groom. The Indian culture’s weddings have different traditions when it comes to proposals, ring traditions and ceremonies not only for the couple but for the families as well.
The God of Small Things by Arundhati Roy tells the story of the communist state of Kerala and the forbidden love between two castes, which changes the lives of everyone. In the novel an ‘Untouchable’, Velutha is a carpenter and works at Paradise Pickles and Preserves for much less than he deserves because of his status as an Untouchable in the caste system. Velutha falls into a forbidden love with a divorced woman, Ammu who is associated with an upper caste Syrian Christian Ipe family. Marriage was the only way that Ammu could have escaped this life, but she lost the chance when marrying the wrong man, as he was an alcoholic and this resulted in them getting a divorce. Ammu breaks the laws that state ‘who should be loved, and how and how much’, as their affair threatens the ‘caste system’ in India, which is a hierarchal structure and social practice in India in which your position in society is determined and can’t be changed. Arhundati Roy portrays the theme of forbidden love within the caste systems and shows how they are t...