Things Fall Apart Father Son Relationship Essay

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A relationship between a father and son can be very confusing, especially to a young woman. In the book, Things Fall Apart by Chinua Achebe, there are several relationships that Okonkwo has with his children. Throughout the book, Okonkwo fails with three relationships between his sons and daughter. This proves that even Okonkwo himself, a “strong man” in his village, is a “weak man”. Okonkwo’s relationship with Ikemefuna is interesting. Okonkwo adopted the boy and raised him as his own. Okonkwo adored Ikemefuna and favored him among the rest of his sons. And Ikemefuna adored him right back. Okonkwo thought that his own son was more of a man that his biological son, Nwoye. Ikemefuna started to call Okonkwo “father,” yet when the village elders …show more content…

Nwoye was the biological son of Okonkwo’s who did not live up to Okonkwo’s expectations of who his son should be. Nwoye was gentle instead of being tough like Okonkwo wanted. Okonkwo thought of Nwoye’s gentleness as a sign of weakness, one he related to his father, who he also saw as a weak man. The one thing Nwoye wanted most was to prove to his father that he was, in fact, ready to enter manhood. “He [Okonkwo] wanted Nwoye to grow into a tough young man capable of ruling his father’s household when he was dead and gone to join the ancestors” (page 32). Okonkwo wanted a sire who would be capable and ready to lead his family when Okonkwo was ready to die and leave this world. He wished for his son to be strong enough to replace him, if not stronger. Yet Okonkwo did not share his feelings about his son, he kept them inside. He thought that by not sharing his feelings, he was being a strong man, stronger than his father, who before him had been very kind and open about his feelings. Because of Okonkwo’s unwillingness to become like his father, this lead Nwoye to dream about his father thinking of him more than a weak son. Nwoye felt alone, waiting to finally be recognized as the strong man he is. “They go through their adolescent rituals day after day for a lifetime, waiting for a father to anoint them and treat them as good enough to be considered a man” (Pittman). Since Okonkwo never shared his dream for …show more content…

A father should be vocal and express his true feelings rather than keep quiet in fear of being less of a man. Okonkwo was his own antagonist, not letting his emotions take control of his life, in fear of becoming like his father. He does not only show his weakness through his mistakes, he demonstrates how his thoughts of how a strong man should be varied from person to person. Okonkwo thought that he was the strong man of his village, but took the weak man’s exit when he commits suicide, which brings around the full circle of how men can be both strong and weak through their

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