The Unforgetting Short Story

There are different types of parent and child relationships. There are relationships based on structure, rules, and family hierarchy. While others are based on understanding, communication, trust, and support. Both may be full of love and good intentions but, it is unmistakable to see the impact each distinct relationship plays in the transformation of a person. In Chang’s story, “The Unforgetting”, and Lagerkvist’s story, “Father and I”, two different father and son relationships are portrayed. “The Unforgetting” interprets Ming and Charles Hwangs’ exchange as very apathetic, detached, and a disinterested. In contrast, the relationship illustrated in the “Father and I” is one of trust, guidance, and security. In comparing and contrasting the two stories, there are distinct differences as well as similarities of their portrayal of a father and son relationship in addition to a tie that influences a child’s rebellion or path in life.

In “The Unforgetting”, Ming Hwangs and his wife, Sansan, abandoned their life of misfortune in China by setting off to Iowa.

With the perception of a bright and new beginning they willingly forced themselves to forget about the “colors of the Beijing sky” and “what they no longer could bear hope for” (Chang 33, 29). Sacrificing their past life, they wanted to give their son Charles a life of fulfillment and opportunity in the land of dreams, America. Their Chinese culture and traditions were neglected in the corner of their basement and the American lifestyle was rapidly immersing the Hwangs family. With the pressure to learn and comprehend this new American culture, the relationship between father and son slowly became disconnected. Ming’s demand to forget his past and the pressure to absorb new cultural ways, took a toll on the relationship between him and his son causing it to drift and become almost non-

existent.

However, in Lagerkvist’s story it is clear from the very beginning that the father and son have a strong bond. Starting the story with the fresh feel of “setting off briskly in the warm sunshine” the reader is left at ease, just as the boy feels in the presence of his father (Lagerkvist 49). Instantly, it’s made clear that there is an affectionate and strong bond between the man and his child. As they take on their adventure and roam the familiar woods, a very routine outing turns into one of uncertainty. This left the young boy, who once felt protected with the strong grip of his father’s hand, with a fear of a dark reality. Because the boy has the realization that “it was anguish that was to come, the unknowns” and “That was how the world, this life, would be for [him] me” it does not take away the fact that his father spent the time to build a relationship based on love, protection, and communication (Lagerkvist 52).

In contrasting both Chang’s and Lagerkvist’s stories, it is clear that both fathers had very different relationships with their son. The father and son relationship was never truly structured or made a priority in the Hwangs household. There was never an effort to communicate and share parts of their lives with each other. This is evident on that one winter evening when Charles is helping his mother set the dinner table and Ming brings up Charles’ interest in history. They both begin sharing their own curiosity on particular topics. The reader finally gets a glimpse of hope for a bond to develop between the two. Until Charles asks why China is poor. This immediately causes Ming to detach and feel displeased. Realizing he has forced himself to forget an enormous part of his past life and culture. He begins to “envy the easy way Charles reached for the past. How could he explain to his son that the past was his enemy?”(Chang 33). Ming’s memories are holding him back from building not only a future for his boy, but a father/ son relationship.

However, in “Father and I” the father has no problem sharing his past and memories with his son. In their adventure “they wanted to get to the river, for it was more beautiful there than anywhere else; there was something special about it, the farther upstream it flowed past where Father had lived as a child” (Lagerkvist 50). Because Father includes his son in the details of his childhood, this forms a strong sense of communication and closeness between the two.

There is also a noticeable contrast between the affection shared in both relationships. In “The Unforgetting”, there’s much tension between Ming and Charles. They’re both very detached from each other. This disconnect is apparent when Ming “was surprised to find his son’s door closed. He stood dumbly for a moment and then without thinking, put his hand on the knob. The door was locked” (Chang 34). In the Chinese culture this is seen as disrespectful and this act truly disturbed Ming. He was shocked and could not understand why Charles’ door would be locked, “as if Charles had access to another world inside that room, as if he might disappear at will. (Chang 35). In analyzing this, it’s evident that the locked door is more than just a disrespectful act in Chinese culture, it symbolizes a barrier in the relationship between father and son.

As for the father/son relationship in Lagerkvist’s story, they two are close, supportive and loving towards each other. “Father took me by the hand one Sunday afternoon, as we were to go out into the woods and listen to the birds” (Lagerkvist 49). The affection and relationship between them is so distinctly different from the one Ming and Charles have. While the father and young boy hang around the bank and are “both gay and cheerful by nature” Ming and Charles are living separate lives under the same roof.

Just because one father and son relationship is more guided and supportive than the other doesn't mean there won’t be difficulties and obstacles to overcome. In comparing both sons, it is apparent that they both felt a lack of guidance and protection in the end. Even though the child in “Father and I” had a strong bond with his dad, fear and uncertainty made him realize that his father won’t always be there to protect him. As in “The Unforgetting” Charles never had any sort of guidance or connection with his father. He was left wanting to find his purpose and explore the uncertainty of life. In his life of loneliness, he found comfort through his studies and aspirations. He created the guidance and structure for himself that was lacking in his home. Both boys were forced to grasp the concept that life is never certain, there are parts of it that you must walk alone.

With this comparison comes a tie of rebellion seen in both sons. While Charles decides to rebel against his family’s wishes and applies to universities away from home, the young boy in “Father and I” rebels against being a “copy” of his father. Both sons realize that they must find their own way in life. Charles by taking the opportunities that were given to him when he moved to America. The opportunities his parents were planning for. The plan they later regretted. And the child from “Father and I” understanding that all his life his father had served as a protector and calm force, but that security isn't always guaranteed. He is faced with the cold reality that life doesn't always stream easily as the river which flowed past where his father had one lived. “It wasn't a real world, a real life. It just hurtled, blazing, into the darkness that had no end” (Lagerkvist 52). Both the young boy and Charles would live a life undoubtedly different then the ones their fathers had lived.

In conclusion, it is evident through comparing and contrasting both stories, that Chang’s and Lagerkvist’s portrayal of a father and son relationship differ, However, through these differences, similarities are weaved within the text. No matter if a relationship is built on communication and support or on rule and separation, both will impact the transformation of the child’s character and life.