“Where Is It Written?” by Adam Schwartz , is a story about a thirteen year old Jewish boy name Sam who is fighting to live with his father so he can build a relationship with him and escape from the negativity that he faces while living with his mother. Sam first deals with trying to convince his father to sue his father. Then, he deals with arguments in his apartment with his mom. Finally, at the end of the story he lives with his father after a incident at his Bar Mitzvah. Coming of age is an important theme in which the protagonist matures towards the end of the story after dealing with conflicts in his/her life. Sam came of age because he realized that no matter how difficult and stressful the relationship is between him and his mother, …show more content…
he will always care for her. Sam lived with his mother after the divorce of his parents. Therefore, living with his mom wasn’t the best years of his life, but his intentions aren’t to hurt her, he is leaving for the sake of himself and wanting to bond with his father. To begin, this story takes place in New Jersey. The author introduces the protagonist, Sam , who is dealing with his mother who is stressing him out*. His solution to this problem is to ask his father to get custody over him so he can build a relationship with his father. Sam explains that he wants to get to know his father more since he doesn’t live with him nor knows him well. He also introduces us to his mother, Sandra, who is very aggressive towards Sam because she is a single mother *. Some of the minor characters that are mentioned towards the beginning of the story, include Sam’s father (whose name is unknown),Phyllis who is the father’s wife*, Debbie who is Sam’s step sister, lastly Sy (Sandra’s boyfriend). Sam mostly focused on describing Sandra because she was the reason why the custody discussion was brought up throughout the story*.The important details provided by the author in the beginning of the story are important because they demonstrate how the relationship is amongst all the characters in the story. The protagonist Sam is a character that can be characterized as observant. He is observant because throughout the story he described his mother and all the other characters very well and perspicuous so that readers can visualize the characters as we read. Sam was very descriptive when it came to his mother. He was very descriptive when it came to his mother’s life that she lives, also the life that she lived when she was married to her ex husband, her career as a Psychologist, lastly, the loneliness of her love life. In the story, Sam talks about how his mother and father met which was in the shower. Sam says “ My father, recently ordained, was covered with soap in the primitive communal shower when my mother walked in, nineteen, naked, enthusiastic about everything. Several months later they were married, but my mother was bored by the life of a rabbi’s wife.” (Schwartz, pg.7). This quote basically shows that when Sandra was in her last marriage with her ex-husband, she slowly started to lose interest towards him as the months passed by. This quote also demonstrates that Sam gained a lot of details from his mother on how his father and Sandra met because when Sam was talking to his father about wanting to sue his mother, he made a gesture that made Sam wonder if that’s how he met his mother. Another adjective that describes Sam is unhappy. When Sam and Sandra was heading to his bar mitzvah, Sandra came uninvited to the event and Sam wasn’t too happy about that. As they were in the car, Sandra said “You know this isn’t a question of religion. You just don’t want me to come. Admit it.” (Schwartz, pg.95). Basically, this quote is showing that Sam is disenchanted towards his mother and does not like it when she is present at any event that he attends. This is important because Sam _________________________ ____________(Detailed analysis! 4-6 sentences!) Sam’s mother Sandra is another major character in the story. A word that best describes her is desperate. The reason for this is because in the story, Sandra came into the kitchen one afternoon and saw Sam eating his dinner. Sandra complimented his food without evening knowing that Sam was still mad at her. He was mad at her because they went back and forth at each other about Sandra having a friendship with her patient. In the story, Sam mentions that his mom is insisting that she can change and learn to cook, “ But you don’t have to leave. I can change. I’ll change. You want me to cook? I’ll learn to cook. I’ll be the best cook in the world.” (Schwartz, pg. 90) This quote illustrates Sandra desperately wanting Sam to stay with her badly. She thinks that if she tells Sam that she can change, Sam will believe her and will decide not to live with his father. However, Sam already made his decision and prefers not to stay with his mother. This quote also shows that Sandra can also be described as broken. In the story, Sam was at Florence Fein’s office whose a psychologist. He went to see her because Sandra schedule an appointment for Sam to meet with her to figure things out about living with his father. As they were talking, Florence Fein mentioned that his mother expressed to her that she failed at everything she’s ever tried to do in her life, but one thing she does not to want fail at doing is being a parent. Another section of the story that shows this is when she left Sam at home to have him experience how it feels to be abandoned. When Sandra did not come home that night nor bothered to call Sam while was home, Sam was hurt because he really felt lonely when his mother wasn’t there. This is significant because _Sandra _______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ To me, even though Sandra is a broken person and her past was not the greatest, abandoning her son wasn’t the right choice to do because their relationship is already unstable and filled with alot of emotions towards one another. Although Sam doesn’t view his mother as such as bad parent, he is completely ready to move in with his father and live a life where he doesn’t have to constantly clean and cook. Sam been noticed how torn his mother is from the inside but for her to make the decision to not be present with her child is unacceptable. I believe that Sandra has a past with her parents similar to how she treats Sam because there is definitely a deeper reason why she went out her way to abandon her child. Usually, when parents do that to their child, it’s because they want them to know how he/she felt when their parents was not stable. Sam’s relationship with his mother in the beginning of the story can be best described as toxic.
The reason for this is because in the story, Sam was staying at his father’s house and while he was there, his mother called several times to know how to cook a lemon-chicken recipe. However, Sam was trying to avoid talking his mother because he told her not to call as he was visiting his father. Also, he mentioned that he will talk to his mother about the letter once he comes back home.The letter was about him wanting his father to get custody over him and also mentioned that he is not trying to hurt her. Furthermore, while Phyllis and Sandra were going back and forth on the phone for a short period, Sandra called again but this time Sam picked up the phone instead. Over the phone, Sandra began to yell at Sam because she got into a little argument with Phyllis which wouldn’t of had happened if Sam picked up the phone. In quote, Sandra said “ You little bastard! Don’t bother coming home. If I never see you again I’ll die happy!” (Schwartz, pg. 83) This quote shows the negative words that Sandra would exchange towards Sam in their relationship. Sam attempts to get away from his mother shows that the relationship is unstable because of the lifestyle his mother lives. He doesn’t like the fact that he lives in a apartment with his mom that treats him poorly because he never does anything wrong. Sam isn’t a bad child who disrespects her all the time. Later in the story, Sam discusses living with his mother in her apartment and he says, “Everything! The cooking, the cleaning, the shouting. Everything!” (Schwartz, pg. 87) In this quote, we can see that in the relationship, Sam holds a lot of responsibility when it comes to taking care of the house because his mom relies on him to cook dinner and clean the house. This is important because it
shows I think the relationship between Sam and his mother shows that a relationship between a parent and a child can be overwhelming because Sam was also stressed out due to the treatment he receives from his mom and the lack of normality he has in his life. Sandra lacked characteristics as a parent because she wouldn’t take care of the house like a mother would normally do. In my opinion, Sam was being more of the adult in the house and was taking care of his mother instead. Since life was bringing Sandra down, someone had to switch roles. Therefore, Sam became the man of the house.
But life is not a fairytale. Standing there lonely, having no job is our Sammy. This is when Sam realizes his path, the true way to become mature. The moment when “Lengel sighs and begins to look very patient:” Sammy, you don’t want to do this to your mom and dad” (Updike) hold him back a little bit, we can feel the regret in his heart. But he cannot go back anymore, decision has been made. He gives up his last chance; from now on, he’s on his own. Sammy finally understands that it is responsible behavior but not playing “adult-like” game that will make him a true
...e on her part. Throughout the story, the Mother is portrayed as the dominant figure, which resembled the amount of say that the father and children had on matters. Together, the Father, James, and David strived to maintain equality by helping with the chickens and taking care of Scott; however, despite the effort that they had put in, the Mother refused to be persuaded that Scott was of any value and therefore she felt that selling him would be most beneficial. The Mother’s persona is unsympathetic as she lacks respect and a heart towards her family members. Since the Mother never showed equality, her character had unraveled into the creation of a negative atmosphere in which her family is now cemented in. For the Father, David and James, it is only now the memories of Scott that will hold their bond together.
This lead to one of the biggest questions from the movie, how did he become that way? Hirschi’s Control Theory is a theory that states “that social control depends on people anticipating the consequences of their behavior”(Macionis 248). It was shown in the movie that Sam had a complicated relationship with his family, so his past is a big reason as to why he acts so deviant in the future. On of the four types of social control is attachment. Attachment is family, friends and school relationships. Sam was first introduced as one of Benny’s friends “crazy cousin”. It was clear that he did not enjoy having Sam around. This can reveal that Sam has a weak relationship with his family as a whole because he wasn’t even living with his parents. This would lead Sam to acting deviant without worrying about what they would think of him. It was also later revealed that Sam was kicked out of school based on his actions. Sam never had to worry about his family or school once that relationship broke off. Another type of social control is involvement. Involvement can mean many things, but it’s basically about holding a job, going to school, or participating in a sport. The character of Sam, as stated before, was kicked out of school. So, he didn’t have school keeping him away from deviant behaviors. And then there 's the reveal that Sam can’t write or read well. Sam had made an attempt to get a job at a movie store, but he would 've had to do an application, which required him to write. He was shown to be scared and nervous after he attempted at write on the form. Sam had little involvement in anything because he was a poor writer and reader, which lead him to act more deviant. A final reason as to why Sam acted so deviant, was because had little opportunity in life. He was self conscious about that fact that he couldn 't write, so he never made attempts to move up in the world. He
points within the story is that of how most people feel about age, how they wish to
“Growing up” is a very broad term that is used without a true, consistent definition. In essence, it describes and encompasses themes of coming of age and the loss of innocence as a person moves from child to adult. In many respects, people view this change as a specific, pivotal moment in a person’s life, such as an eighteenth birthday, or the day a person leaves their parents’ house. This idea of having a crucial moment in life, which provides the open door into adulthood, is portrayed in many novels. It is easy to find a death that occurs, or a specific event that causes a character to “grow up” prematurely, but many times, contrary to most beliefs, that exact event is not the turn of the key leading through the doors to maturity. It is rather just a small push which starts a domino effect. This is the same scenario in the novel All the Pretty Horses by Cormac McCarthy. This novel proves that loss of innocence is a learning process rather than the result of a
Conclusion: The author Evan Hunter, of the story, “On The Sidewalk Bleeding” successfully demonstrates the theme of Coming of Age as he shifted his main character from an adolescent, idealistic view of the world to a more mature and realistic view. The character matured from making ignorant and selfish decisions to a more knowledgeable and selfless decisions. Andy came of age from a boy to a man, as he lay on the street bleeding to death. All in all these newly developed characteristics all prove the genre of coming of
Berger, K. S. (2012). The developing person: through childhood and adolescence. (9th ed.). New York, NY: Worth Publishers.
Coming-of-age stories commonly record the transitions—sometimes abrupt, or even violent—from youth to maturity, from innocence to experience of its protagonist, whether male or female. Greasy Lake by T.Coraghessan Boyle and Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been? by Joyce Carol Oates are great examples of traditional coming-of-age stories. The roots of the coming-of-age narrative theme are tracked in the male protagonist’s perspective for Boyle’s short story, while the Oates’ story captures the coming-of-age theme from Connie; a female protagonist’s perspective. In both short stories, the authors fulfill the expectations of a coming-of-age genre when they take us through the journey of rebellion and self realization, as the
Through the story the protagonist a young teenage boy who loses his mother after her suicide herself is then followed by the death of his father in a car crash. At such a young age this boy describes the pain he goes through by the way he responds with regard to how others treat him. He demonstrates how grief can alter a person
At the age of 9, a little girl is counting down the days until her next birthday because double digits are a big deal. Now she is 12 and is still counting the days until she can call herself a teenager. For years people cannot wait to be another year older… until they actually become older. As people grow up they accept that maturing means taking on responsibilities and adulthood. Having sleepovers and play-dates, taking naps, and climbing the monkey bars becomes taboo. The simplistic life of a child quickly changes into the dull reality of school and work. People will spend years wishing they were older; but when the time comes, they hope to go back to their innocence. In The Catcher in the Rye, J.D. Salinger writes a stream of consciousness
In the coming-of-age short story “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?” by Joyce Carol Oates, a fifteen year old girl named Connie has an incident involving a strange man, Arnold Friend, that causes her to grow up quickly and causes her to see the real world for the first time. Through this incident, the author shows how Connie’s vanity, love of music, and her life without a father figure lead her to not be able to handle situations where a person uses those qualities against her; therefore, she has a harsh and quick coming of age.
Nonetheless, this really is a tale of compelling love between the boy and his father. The actions of the boy throughout the story indicate that he really does love his father and seems very torn between his mother expectations and his father’s light heartedness. Many adults and children know this family circumstance so well that one can easily see the characters’ identities without the author even giving the boy and his father a name. Even without other surrounding verification of their lives, the plot, characters, and narrative have meshed together quite well.
Coming to age means various things in different cultures, religions and regions in the world. As an example, in the Jewish religion coming of age happens when a boy or girl reaches the age of thirteen and has a Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah, which symbolizes reaching religious maturity. On the other hand, coming to age is not about turning a certain age or being able to bare a child, but rather coming to terms with your personal identity. Coming to terms with your personal identity does not happen over night, it entails finding yourself and accepting yourself as an individual. Moreover, in the short story, “Birthmark” and the excerpt of The Curious Incident of the Dog in the night, they depict characters that have a hard time coming to terms with themselves. In both scenarios the characters face adversities that the majority of the population do not face which makes them feel like outcasts. Additionally, both characters come-to-age by finding their personal identity through all of the tribulations that they face.
Coming-of-age is a chapter that every individual must eventually trek through in order to grow and mature into one’s own self. In John Updike’s A&P and James Joyce’s Araby, the theme of growth permeates throughout the narratives as their respective protagonists fabricate an ideal world from their own naive perspectives, only to shed their ignorant fantasies about how they believe to understand that the world can bend to their decisions to truly understand the cruelty behind world they live in: reaching maturity through the loss of innocence. Dismissing the pragmatic aspects of life can lead to the downfall of a person’s ideals as they inevitably come to the realize that their dreams are impractical, and even impossible to bring to reality in
In a typical family, there are parents that expected to hear things when their teenager is rebelling against them: slamming the door, shouting at each other, and protests on what they could do or what they should not do. Their little baby is growing up, testing their wings of adulthood; they are not the small child that wanted their mommy to read a book to them or to kiss their hurts away and most probably, they are thinking that anything that their parents told them are certainly could not be right. The poem talks about a conflict between the author and her son when he was in his adolescence. In the first stanza, a misunderstanding about a math problem turns into a family argument that shows the classic rift between the generation of the parent and the teenager. Despite the misunderstandings between the parent and child, there is a loving bond between them. The imagery, contrasting tones, connotative diction, and symbolism in the poem reflect these two sides of the relationship.