The Pressure To Be Perfect Analysis

The Pressure to be Perfect

Expectations is defined as a strong belief that someone should achieve something in the future. Parents often set high expectations for their children whether is in arts, school, and sports. Often, these expectations put pressure on children to make their parents happy. But to what extent is too high??

Even though I do not have testimony about what a mother’s love for her children really is about, I do know that their love for their children is immense through the love my mother has shown me through out my lifetime. Our mothers have played an important part in our lives. They taught us our first words, how to read, how to tie our shoes and many more. Not only do they teach us some of the basic things that are nessacary

for life; but as we get older they are there to be a shoulder to cry on, and an advice giver when you want it and even when you do not want it. They love you through anything no matter how old you get. But they also do have expectations of what they want their children’s future to be like. In Amy Tan’s Two Kinds a little girl experiences being raised by a mother who an overwhelming amount of expectations for the little girl, Jing-Mei. Through out the story Jing-Mei struggles with who she wants to be, or with what her mother wants her to be. But to Jing-Mei’s mother there are only two kinds of daughter in the world. ““Only two kinds of daughters.” she shouted in Chinese. “Those who are obedient and those who follow their own mind! Only one kind of daughter can live in this house. Obedient daughter!”’ (Tan 326). Her mother started pushing Jing-Mei harder and harder so she started to rebel against her mother. But through trial and error, and a couple years later she finally realizes that her mother only wanted what was best for her daughter and was doing it out of love.
At the beginning of the story Jing-Mei enjoys making her mother proud and was just as excited as her mother. “I was just as excited as my mother, maybe even more so” ( Tan 321). Jing-Mei was just like an little girl. Most girls think becoming famous one day is exciting, and so she was excited with the thought of becoming the asian Shirley Timple. Anyhow, Jing-Mei’s mother’s desire for her to become a prodigy quickly turned into an obsession. “Every night after dinner, mother and I would sit at the Formica kitchen table. She would present new tests” (Tan 321). Jing-Mei knew she would never be a genius. And she hated the fact that she was disappointing her mother by getting questions wrong. “And after seeing my mother’s disappointed face once again, something inside of me began to die” (Tan 321). No child ever wants to disappoint their parents but with the pressure that her mother put on her to meet those expectations there was no way she could reach them. The daily tests that her mother gave her did not help her at all. The test mainly discouraged Jing-Mei and she quickly thought she was unintelligent.
Later on as the story continues, the mother realizes that her daughter would not become a prodigy by being a genius.

She decides to switch her focus on her daughter becoming a prodigy at playing the piano. The mother quickly found put together a schedule of piano practices that Jing-Mei would partake in with Mr. Chong, a neighbor in their apartment building. “My mother traded housecleaning serves for weekly lessons and a piano for to practice on every day, two hours a day, from four to six (Tan 323). When her mother told her what she would do from then on, Jing-Mei was aggravated because she did not want to try to live up to her mother’s expectations anymore. “Why don't you like me the way I am? I’m not a genius! I can’t play the piano. And even if I could, I wouldn't go on TV if you paid me a million dollars!” (Tan 323). At that moment is when she could not take having to live up to her mother’s expectations any longer. She quickly detected that because Mr. Chong was so old that “his eyes were too slow to keep up with the wrong notes I was playing” (Tan 323). She learned that she could make as many mistakes as she wanted and Mr. Chong would not even

notice.
One Sunday after church the mother’s friend was bragging about how talented her daughter was at playing chess.

“All day she play chess. All day I have no time do nothing but dust off her winnings” (Tan 324). After hearing Auntie Lindo go on about her child, Jing-Mei’s mother wanted to brag about her daughter as well “Our problem worser than yours. If we ask Jing-Mei wash dish. She hear nothing but music. You can’t stop this natural talent” (Tan 324). When Jing-Mei hurt her mother’s comment she knew she “had to put a stop to her foolish pride” (Tan 324). A few weeks after the incident the mother decided to put Jing-Mei in the church’s talent show to prove to Aunt Lindo how talented she was at playing the piano. But talented was not the word to describe Jing-Mei with her piano playing ability. The talent show did not go how her mother expected it to. Once again something inside of Jing-Mei died inside as she could feel yet again the disappointment in her parents faces. “But my mother’s expression was what devastated me: a quiet, blank look that said she had lost everything” (Tan 326).

Even after the talent show disaster Jing-Mei mother still told her to go to piano practice. At this moment Jing-Mei realized that she had to stand up to her mother that she did not want to play the piano. But her mother still insisted that she must be obedient and go to piano lessons. “You want me to be someone that I’m not! I’ll never be the kind of daughter you want me to be” (Tan 326). This

was Jing-Mei’s “breaking point” she felt like she could not longer live up to the expectations and standards her mother had for her.
Once she turned thirty and her mother tried to give her back the piano, she finally realized that all the pressure her mother put on her was only because loved her. Just because we don’t live up to the expectations that are parents have for us, does not mean they will not stop loving us. They pressure us because they want to see us succeed in everything we do. And if we do not meet their expectations they eventually will forgive us, it is just what parents do for their children.