Divorce, once unheard of among most people, is now a commonplace occurrence in families when the adults have decided that they can no longer work out their differences. Unfortunately, divorce tends to have a negative impact on the children in the family, particularly affecting children who already have psychological or emotional difficulties, such as ADHD (Patten, 1999). Problems that arise in children of divorce run the gamut from behavioral problems to later relationship/trust issues. Children of divorce more often display behavioral problems at school than do children from intact families, except when abuse is present in the home (Corcoran, 1997). Children of divorce also have more academic trouble than children from intact homes. This holds true no matter how their academic achievement is scored, whether by grades, standardized tests, or dropout rates, children of divorce tend to have poorer scores than children in a two parent home (Patten, 1999).
The problems faced by children of divorce vary depending on the child’s age at the time of the divorce. Very young children (under age two) may not experience problems at all but from age three to age five, children may become more aggressive, tearful, and regress to younger behavior, such as going back to difficulty with independent toileting or needing the comfort of a security blanket (Patten, 1999). Preschool age children may withdraw, preferring to spend time alone rather than playing with other children. They may also seek out the attention of adults more often or become more anxious or angry (Patten, 1999). Young children are also often given to fantasies about their parents’ reconciliation (Corcoran, 1997). Older school-age children tend to try and cope with the situati...
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Works Cited
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Arjun feels ignored because of his mother’s attitude, “When Arjun left the room, his mother’s footsteps did not follow him, as they so often had in old house. Once as he loudly dragged his feet he heard the man saying, let him be, he is growing up, you have to give him space” (Kapur 148). The worse happened in the form of his admission in a boarding school, which left Raman at the back foot. It is the tragic plight of children that in spite of having parents they had to go to boarding school. Dr. Carl Pickhardt narrates the effects of divorce on children’s psyche in his article, The Impact of Divorce on Young Children and Adolescents:
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Divorce is becoming a worldwide phenomenon, significantly affecting children’s well-being. It radically changes their future, causing detrimental effects. According to (Julio Cáceres-Delpiano and Eugenio Giolito, 2008) nearly 50% of marriages end with divorce. 90% of children who lived in the USA in the 1960s stayed with their own biological parents, whereas today it makes up only 40% (Hetherington, E. Mavis, and Margaret Stanley-Hagan, 1999). Such an unfavorable problem has been increasing, because in 1969, the California State Legislature changed the divorce laws, where spouses could leave without providing cause (Child Study Center, 2001).
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Most people, when thinking about divorce, worry about the impact that it has on the children that are involved. Even though children are most likely better off if totally incompatible parents separate instead of staying together, divorce is about loss and change, and it is still hard for children. Everyone knows that divorce has its effects on children. There are three different sources that try to explain these effects. Graham Blaine Jr. states that divorce is a threat to all children, whereas Rhona Mahony states that divorce is not always the cause of behavioral or academic problems in children coming from divorced families. Yvette Walczak and Sheila Burns state that the extent of the damage can be determined by the parents and their methods of explanation to the children.
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Divorce is a process that many people in America go through. The divorce rate continues to escalate over the years. Divorce is a serious problem, it is a gradual process that ultimately results in families breaking up. There are various factors in which a marriage can fail and end up in divorce. Some skip the step of trying to reconcile things and make it work. In some cases it is easy for a divorce to take place. For instance, in cases where both parties are in agreement and have no children it is easier to handle a divorce. But in the cases where children are present, what happens to the kids? Both parents are at each others throats or one is devastated from the rejection, what role does the child play? It is a hard thing to cope with as an adult imagine as a little one or even a teenager, it affects them in more ways than anyone can imagine. It can affect them both physically and emotionally. The effects of divorce are immense, it permanently weakens the bond or relationship between a child and his parents. Can lead to them reaching out or looking to others for attention, causing poor attitudes, low self esteem, dropping grades, loss of virginity, use of drugs and or weapons, or in some cases mutilation of the body. There are various effects that children have to deal with that maybe extremely hard to cope with. One parent may say one thing yet the other disagrees and makes it impossible for the child to have a stable relationship with both of them. Children need both biological parents at their side to be guardians and counselors in their lives, to be examples of what they need to do to become outstanding citizens in our community.
Arkowitz, Hal, and Scott O. Lilienfeld. (2013). "Is Divorce Bad for Children?". Scientific American Mind. 24(1).
Hughes, Jr. R. Ph.D. (2009) The effects of divorce on children. University of Illinois at urbana-Champaign
(2009). The effects of divorce on children (Order No. 1470847). Available from ProQuest Dissertations & Theses Full Text. (304998358). Retrieved from http://search.proquest.com/docview/304998358?accountid=458
The Negative Effect of Divorce on Children Divorce has a negative effect on the psychological and social aspects of our children, which may appear instantly or not come to the surface for years. This is why I think that divorce should only be a last resort and not rushed into, even by couples with the most troubled marriages. The only acceptable reason for someone rushing into divorce is if they or their children are in danger. I believe that marriage is a commitment not to be taken lightly and disregarded at the first bump in the road, especially when there are children involved. Far too many people do not want to take responsibility for their actions and choices; for example, people use abortion as birth control and couples’ jumping in and out of marriages like it’s a trial and error institution.
In the world we live in today, divorce has unfortunately become a normal thing in our lives. Many married couples are getting divorced for many reasons; problems in the marriage, either a spouse having an affair, a loss of feelings, and many other types of complications. Many divorces involve children who are young and due to their age do not understand what is really going on. We all know someone who has dealt with divorce. Children are the ones who are typically affected the most by the divorce and they will have to learn to cope with their parent’s divorce at such a young age, affecting them in positive or negative ways.