After reading chapter three Alternatives to Self-Disclosure I have concluded a benevolent lie is when someone manipulates the truth to benefit the situation, but not with the intentions of harming anyone in the process. This type of lie is better known as the harmless little white lie that is intended to protect those we tell them too. Learning about this topic pointed out how often it happens without notice, for example my little girl just lost her front teeth and asked me if she will look pretty for her school pictures. My reply was “You’re going to be the most beautiful girl in the world!” Don’t get me wrong, she is beautiful to me no matter what, but not to the world. I just want her to have self-confident in her smile. The most common …show more content…
This benevolent lie is told to benefit me I guess to threaten her when she misbehaves. I am sure I’m not the first or the last to use this as a discipline tactic. Another example is my second born goes around saying she is my favorite child so, I just agree that she is my favorite child and not to tell her sisters so their feeling won’t get hurt. They’re all my favorite girls in their own special way not just her but It makes her day. These benevolent lies just keep coming. My oldest daughter had a pet fish that she cared for. The fish recently died so I had to replace it before she came home. She noticed it looked a little different and asked if I noticed anything dissimilar. I replied, “No dear.” Why? This lie was said to spare my daughter from devastation caused by losing a pet. These types of white lies are created to protect those we care for although feeling justified because they’re done with good …show more content…
Come to think about it sometimes when texting there’s a lot of benevolent lying going on. Like when my friend texted me asking if I’m still in bed around noon my text reply was “I am up and ready to go” but I was still in bed. It’s evident that we’re all guilty of elaborating on the truth though social media. People lie because it’s easy due to no one can see you or your actions through these texts or post. Social media seem to be full of deception now that I have knowledge on this benevolent lie. Realizing that in my group of girlfriends there is a lot of benevolent lies going on. Last week we gave each other gifts and I received a set of storage photo boxes with a peacock pattern. The friend that had given me this gift asked if I had liked the gift. I said yes, but really, I disliked the pattern. I choose not to tell her because her feelings get hurt very easy. Out of common courtesy for her efforts and our friendship I kept it to myself. We have been friends for a long time so I know what and how she feels in different situations. As for me I want people to be honest no matter what. I rather hear the truth and I’ll not hold resentment towards them for expressing what they really feel. Some folks want to hear or tell the truth and some others want to avoid the truth rather than say something they don’t really mean or that is rude. Not all individuals can take the hurtful truth in good
Richard Gunderman asks the question, "Isn 't there something inherently wrong with lying, and “in his article” Is Lying Bad for Us?" Similarly, Stephanie Ericsson states, "Sure I lie, but it doesn 't hurt anything. Or does it?" in her essay, "The Ways We Lie.” Both Gunderman and Ericsson hold strong opinions in regards to lying and they appeal to their audience by incorporating personal experiences as well as references to answer the questions that so many long to confirm.
In “Autonomy and Benevolent Lies” Thomas Hill presents the case of benevolent lies and if they are morally troublesome. Philosophers have been debating the moral difference between a malicious lie, told in order to hurt people, and a benevolent lie. According to Hill benevolent lies are “intended to benefit the person deceived, for no ulterior motives, and they actually succeed in giving comfort without causing main” (Thomas E. Hill). Many argue that benevolent lies are no different from a malicious lie because telling a lie is morally wrong. Others argue benevolent lies and malicious lies differ because of the deliberate intentions. Hill provides the reader with three cases of a benevolent lies. The three cases he presents are the possible suicide of a student which a Professor lies to the student’s mother, the
Although it is considered wrong to tell lies, it seems that literature has offered us situations where telling lies isn’t necessarily bad. Of course, lying often has a tragic outcome, but not always for the person or people who told the lie or lies. Oftentimes, these unfortunate outcomes are directed at the person about whom the lie was told. Furthermore, these stories have explained that dishonesty can result in success for both the liar and the target. Maybe we have been teaching the wrong values to our children.
White lies are usually used to prevent the hurting of someone’s feelings. In The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time Christopher’s father uses white lies to deceive Christopher without establishing more questions about Christopher’s mother's flee. In everyday life, people lie extremely often, causing it to be difficult to tell when someone is actually lying. According to Pamela Meyer, “Lying's complex. It's woven into the fabric of our daily and our business lives. We're deeply ambivalent about the truth...We're against lying, but we're covertly for it in ways that our society has sanctioned for centuries and centuries and centuries. It's as old as breathing. It's part of our culture, it's part of our history.”(Meyer 4:59) In fact, the reason behind Christopher believing his father’s lies is because they are familiar in a way. Ed lies to Christopher, because of habit more than to protect anyone. Although, Christopher’s father used mostly white lies to protect Christopher from the harsh truth, he does it because of the emotion that goes along with them. Even though Christopher has a difficult time showing emotion he becomes upset. According to Paul Ekman in Lying and Deception, “Lies are also betrayed by signs of emotions. The simplest case is one in which the liar attempts to convincingly fabricate an emotion that is not felt. Few people are very good at this, although most of the time people get away
The White Lie is a harmless or trivial lie, especially one told to avoid hurting someone’s feeling and it is used between Abigail and John. Lie is to speak falsely or utter untruth knowingly, as with intent to deceive and lying connects to power because people are empower
Ericsson's article is clearly about the way people lie, mainly whether the manner in which people lie to others is to make the other’s life easier or their own life easier. People lie every day, whether in simple white lies or more complex lies. Ericsson describes white lies, the most popular lies. She uses an example, how a friend told her another friend looked good when, in fact, she did not look good. People use these types of lies daily to avoid confrontation. “The liar deciding what is best for the lied to” (Ericsson #). Anyone can use them, children to parents, friend to friend, students to teachers, boyfriend to girlfriend, etc. A white lie is a good way to keep oneself out of trouble. Ericsson thinks white lies are so common because the truth is more dangerous than a simple lie. However, the lie may seem simple and part of daily life, but Ericsson points out that it is not always so simple. Telling a white lie may benefit to you in the short term, but if for a...
First Ericsson discuss white lies, she describes white lies as when a person “assumes that the truth will cause more damage than a simple, harmless untruth” (Ericsson 181). A person decides that it is better to tell the lie rather than to tell the truth because of how they perceive the outcome will be. Ericsson believes that people should not use white lies because they’re “[deciding] what is best for someone else” (Ericsson 181). When people use white lies they’re assuming that what they are doing is good for the other person, even if they do not know for sure that the other person will benefit from not knowing. On the other hand in the book “The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time” by Mark Haddon, the main character, Christopher does not believe in lying but he uses white lies. Christopher says, “A white lie is not a lie at all. It is where you tell the truth but you do not tell all of the truth” (Haddon 48). In this situation, Christopher’s
I do not believe that anyone should get their feelings hurt when just saying an innocent white lie could save them so much drama. Also protective lies are very important to me. If someone is dealing with a lot of stress or a deathly illness, there is no need to put more on them. However, when it comes to peace keeping lies, I believe that they should not be used. These lies are very hard not to use, and I find myself using them despite my hardest efforts. Trust-keeping lies are one of the worst lies because I feel forced to choose between my personal morals and a friendship. Although I try not to lie at all, I find that social lies and protective lies are the most acceptable. I find that peace-keeping lies and trust-keeping lies are unacceptable yet I still understand that sometimes they are
... I think that was one of those rare situations that made it OK to lie.
Telling the truth can have some consequences, but a lie can cause more damage in a relationship once it has been figured out. People believe that by just lying, a problem is solved, but problems start when lies are told. Lying destroys relationships and truth builds honest relationships which, can last forever. In both F. Scott Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby and Rob Marshall’s Chicago, characters lie because they feel that it is easier. However, lying leads to a downward- spiral. The society we live in can either lead us to a complicated relationship with the truth or easygoing. The problem with constantly telling lies is that it starts off with one, then leads to another until everything you say is a lie. Being truthful
When you 're being honest with people, generally they are trying to be honest with you, so it makes the communication process much easier. I abhor the idea of lying to people just for the purpose of reaching your own goals. Even when he or she succeeds I do not think there can be felt a whole lot of satisfaction from the accomplishment based on lies. Maybe I am sounding too idealistic but I strongly believe that our society would be much better if only people became more honest to each other. Primarily, the issue of honesty is concerned with politics and often we can see many crude and brutal crimes made against humanity, which could have been prevented if from the very start people were not deluded by the politicians '
White lies are defined as diplomatic or well-intentioned deception. There are many different types of white lies that are told, such as, lies of flattery for example; if someone gives another person a gift and the gift was not what the person wanted, this person would reply “thank you so much! I just love it!” This type of white lie is told because telling someone that their gift was undesirable would make the teller look like an inconsiderate being.
I am going to argue why it is okay to tell as small lie to a friend in order to spare their feelings. I am going to touch on two ethical models, these being, Utilitarianism and Deontology. The individual that is a Utilitarian is Jeremy Bentham and the Deontologist is Immanuel Kant. I will be sharing their ideas and explaining why Jeremy Bentham’s ideas are more defensible than Kant’s ideas. I believe that if you are a good friend, it is important for you to keep the most optimal happiness between your friends and yourself. With Bentham's theory, Utilitarianism, the overall goal is to make the most people happy (Bentham 1). If the storyline of a lie is what makes the most people happy, Benthem says it is okay to lie. For Kant, a person is never
Clearly, you 'd think that just telling the truth straight would leave you without always feeling gripped by the
To begin, sometimes it is better to lie rather than telling the truth and hurting someone’s feelings. It is not wrong when you tell a little white lie to keep someone you care about from getting hurt. To be specific, if your friend asked you how you feel about her hair, and you do not like it, you would not want to tell her that. Instead of telling the truth, and hurting her fragile feelings, you would rather say a little lie, telling her that you love it. If you are lying to keep someone you care about from getting their feelings hurt, or their pride wounded, then what is the harm? In conclusion, there is nothing wrong with telling small lies, if you are doing it with someone’s best interest in mind.