Lying to Ourselves
Modern culture is comfortable with bending the truth. This thought poses the question, “is culture’s comfort with lies leading to a feeling of apathy in other aspects?” If we lose trust we become complacent in matters that seem simple, then escalation occurs and large problems can arise. Apathy is especially disturbing in the example of privacy. Personally, nothing bothers me more than someone complaining about a problem, without trying to look for a solution. This is exactly the case with privacy concerns. I will discuss this concept by discussing how lies lead to apathy, how apathy affects privacy, and how to remedy the situation.
Words can have multiple meanings and applications. To avoid confusion, I want to define what
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is meant by some words. Apathy in the sense that people are indifferent towards matters that are not only small, but some that are very large. Targeted advertisement is a technique that is used by advertising firms to collect data about an individual in an attempt to show more relevant advertisements. Targeting advertisements use a sort of cookie called an advertising ID. The advertising ID is used like a digital fingerprint so advertisers can follow what interests individuals have. Usually these advertising IDs can be turned off to enhance security. This paper is discussing how something that seems benign as a little lie can desensitize people. Specifically the lies desensitize people to having concern for matters that should be very concerned about. Facebook is a website that was originally designed in an effort to allow college friends to stay in contact after they had graduated. In order to function in society it seems that it is necessary to lie.
Due to this fact, it seems that a day does not pass without hearing or saying at least one lie. Stephanie Ericsson in her piece “The Ways We Lie” makes the observation about her life “I once tried to go a whole week without telling a lie, and it was paralyzing.” We, as a culture, put utility in this action of lying. This leads to a massive amount of misinformation being transmitted. After undergoing a barrage of information that is false, it is natural to get a thick skin. This is the root of the problem, if we ignore lies then we can easily blow off valid information. If we blow off information then it leads us not to care about the matter. Sometimes the only person we can trust that is telling the truth is only ourselves. Without the trust of truth it is difficult to get behind someone’s cause, and this causes …show more content…
apathy. In the past privacy was mainly controlled by making sure that the people told were trustworthy. Now the concept is the same, but the application in in a different manner. The people in the modern day are corporations and the information they hold is much more than that of the past. Privacy is now a business, rather the minor breach of privacy. Ericsson brings to light an interesting point about mistruths “Any good liar knows that the way to perpetuate an untruth is to deflect attention from it.” Corporations rely heavily on this concept of playing their cards close to their chest. They talk about the new features or bug fixes as opposed to the benefits they are reaping. It is only in good business. Should they reveal their ulterior motives then they would never have patronage. As a result they draw attention away from the negatives and play up the positives. We agree to this minor breach when we use applications. Every application has a terms of use that users must agree to use the service. In these terms of use are usually clauses that allow the company to sell the users data to advertising firms. Facebook is an advertising firm’s dream, and has been exploited as such.
The concept of Facebook as social media is fantastic when pitched as such. In the beginning that was the aim of the website and it was pretty benign. As the website gained traction and users it needed to become a business and generate revenue. Naturally the website added advertisements in order to begin to make money. Eventually advertisement firms discovered that targeted advertisements generate more revenue than non-targeted. This leads the firms to buy user data which Facebook has been collecting. This becomes a symbiotic relationship, where the only person who does not benefit is the user whose data is sold. User’s arguments are relatively weak though, because they sign away their right to selling their data when they agree to the terms of use. Ericsson references an interesting dynamic about groupthink “a lie as a psychological phenomenon within decision-making groups in which loyalty to the group has become more important than any other value”. With this group thought process dangerous outcomes can occur. If a group of people are involved in a website, like Facebook, they feel more comfortable with the idea that their data may be sold. This is due to the group dynamic similar to the “we are all in this together” mentality. It takes individuals to step back and think about what they think about the system. The hope of the users is that they are able to trust the advertising firms to use their data
in a morally correct manner. Apathy is dangerous because it relies on the hope and trust of someone. If one lies then they breach the trust that has been established. As a result it is not in and of itself harmful, but it has the capacity to cause very large amounts of harm. Ericsson points out how we delude ourselves “Delusion uses the mind’s ability to see things in myriad ways to support what it wants to be the truth.” We delude ourselves in an attempt to not realize we are playing with fire by trusting corporations with our information. In this delusion we are lying to ourselves in order to give some peace of mind. In the case of online banking and money transferring, the breach of trust or carelessness with sensitive data, can financially impact someone. There are ways to combat this problem. The main point and most obvious is to think about who has access to sensitive data and whether or not they should have access. A second simple point is to close accounts with companies like Facebook that sell data. Although this is easier said than done, social media has connected the world and it is difficult to give that up. Usually there are settings in programs that give control of the amount of data that is collected in an effort to try to bring more anonymity to users. These are not the True fixes, they are rather suggestions in an effort to better control personal information. Ultimately, it is just necessary to know who knows what, and have trust in them, but do not be surprised if they break that trust.
In The Ways We Lie, Stephanie Ericsson expresses the inevitability of lying and the way it is casually incorporated into our everyday lives. She personally brings light to all the forms of lying and some that are often not recognized as a lie. Ericsson questions the reasons and validity behind lies by highlighting the effects and consequences.
Richard Gunderman asks the question, "Isn 't there something inherently wrong with lying, and “in his article” Is Lying Bad for Us?" Similarly, Stephanie Ericsson states, "Sure I lie, but it doesn 't hurt anything. Or does it?" in her essay, "The Ways We Lie.” Both Gunderman and Ericsson hold strong opinions in regards to lying and they appeal to their audience by incorporating personal experiences as well as references to answer the questions that so many long to confirm.
Judith Viorst is an American journalist. Her essay “The Truth about Lying”, printed in Buscemi and Smith’s 75 Readings: An Anthology. In this essay, Viorst examines social, protective, peace-keeping and trust-keeping lies but doesn’t include lies of influence.
Are everyday rituals, such as, facades reflected as to being a lie? Simply preparing for a meeting or interview does not come off as lying, although another type of façade such as when someone asks, “Are you okay,” after a death of someone close to you, in reality it is a form of a lie, because you are not being honest. In Stephanie Erricsson’s article “The Ways We Lie,” she discusses many different types of lying, that most wouldn’t even consider. Ericsson claimed, “But façades can be destructive because they are used to seduce others into an illusion” (409). Depending how a façade is used, the outcome can be beneficial or damaging. There are facades that are used to cover up one’s true feelings, in order to protect an individual and then there is a type in which one puts on a mask to cover up how awful of a person they are. Charity, a former friend, deceived me with the qualities of everything she was not, my mom is a great example of when it comes to hiding when she is saddened. In this article “The Ways We Lie,” Stephanie Ericsson has a great point of view on the destructiveness of facades, although, it can very well be used in a good way just as much as in a bad way, in fact, like my protective mother, using facades for mine and my sisters own good and then a conniving friend using facades in
Should we stop lying and she would stop letting people lie to us? In “The Ways We Lie”, Stephanie Ericsson describes lying as “a cultural cancer that… reorders reality until moral garbage becomes as invisible to us as water is to a fish” (Ericsson 186). Ericsson believes that we have accepted lies to the point where do not recognize it anymore. Ericsson has a point, lying should not be tolerated but it should be the unnecessary lies that should not be tolerated. There are lies that are justifiable based on the intent of the person lying. All lies are harmful in their own ways from small lies, like white lies, to big lies, like out-and-out lies.
In the short story The Ways We Lie, Stephanie Ericsson describes many different categories of lies. She first starts out explain the little white lie, describing it as a lie which is told when trying to avoid hurting someone. An example she gives in the text is, “telling a friend he looks great when he looks like hell can be based on a decision that the friend needs a compliment more than a frank opinion”(Ericsson, 2004, 121). Ericsson then describes facades, facades according to the Ericsson is when a person shows you what they want you to see, but it’s not the real them. Stating “facades can be destructive because they are used to seduce others into an illusion” (Ericsson, 2004, 122). A perfect example of facades are when a person has to
Stephanie Ericsson’s The Ways We Lie, analyzes and reflects on how lying has simply become the norm in our society. We all lie, there is not one person in the world that does not lie. Most people lie because they are afraid of telling the truth, however what they do not know is telling a lie can lead them in the wrong direction because many things can happen when lying to a person. The person can find out when everything unravels that person will not have trust in you and you would be known as a liar. To every action there is a consequence, so why not deal with just one consequence when telling the
In “The Ways We Lie” by Stephanie Ericsson, the author uses her knowledge to talk about the different ways of lies and how those lies affect the liar, as well as the people who had been told lies. According to the author’s essay, there are 10 types of lies that people encounter every single day: the White Lie, Facades, Ignoring the Plain Facts, Deflecting, Omission, Stereotypes and Cliches, Groupthink, Out-and-Out Lies, Dismissal, and Delusion. Throughout the essay, it is connoted that people are lying in various ways even though they are not intended to. I had been taught that lying is a bad habit. According to Ericsson, there are many types of lie and I did three of them in my life: the White Lie, Omission, and Out-and-Out Lies; however, I can defend my lies for good purposes.
When initially asked about the morality of lying, it is easy for one to condemn it for being wrong or even corrupt. However, those asked are generally guilty of the crime on a daily basis. Lying is, unfortunately, a normal aspect of everyday life. In the essay “The Ways We Lie,” author Stephanie Ericsson makes note of the most common types of lies along with their consequences. By ordering the categories from least to most severe, she expresses the idea that lies enshroud our daily lives to the extent that we can no longer between fact and fiction. To fully bring this argument into perspective, Ericsson utilizes metaphor, rhetorical questions, and allusion.
With social media websites being the main hub of personal information, advertisers are consistently monitoring our social media activity, having the ability to look into our personal information. In the article "Advertising and Consumer Privacy: Old Practices and New Challenges." by Justine Rapp states, “Fueled by advances in capabilities and interconnectedness of computer based technology, advertisers are able to collect and assimilate information on consumers like no other time history” (51). Facebook has become the number one, social media website around the globe. It is the most popular website used by personal and business users in today’s society. In the article “Using Social Media to Reach Consumers: A Content Analysis of Official Facebook Pages” by Amy Parsons states, “As of July 2011, the social network site Facebook claims to have over 750 million members and in the terms of activity.” (27), making it easy to meet and connect with others. Facebook is considered the “hot spot” for online social activity, however, it exposes personal information about its consumers to
What are lies? A lie is defined as follows: To make a statement that one knows to be false, especially with the intent to deceive. There are several ways that lies are told for instance, there are white lies, lies of omission, bold faced lies, and lies of exaggeration. No matter what type of lie that one chooses to tell many people believe that lies do more harm than good.
We lie all the time, lying is not something new to our culture. We lie to our parents, we lie to our friends, we even lie to our significant other, but why do we do it? There is not one set reason on why we lie but they can vary from an insignificant reason to something more nefarious. A good operational definition of a lie is “A lie is a false statement to a person or group made by another person or group who knows it is not the whole truth, intentionally.” (Freitas-Magalhães) We have been raised to know that lying is usually a bad thing, and it’s better to tell the truth, not to mention the circumstances get exponentially worse if you are caught lying. No one wants to be labeled as a liar, or untrustworthy. This may sound unorthodox but I personally think lying is perfectly fine; depending on the situation. If you have a prima-facie duty to be dishonest it’s perfectly acceptable. Ross says a prima facie duty or obligation is an actual duty. “One’s actual duty is what one ought to do all things considered.” (Carson) I’m not the only one who finds this too be true. Ross would also agree with me, He says “Lying is permissible or obligatory when the duty not to lie conflicts with a more important or equal important prima facie duty.” (Carson) As I was doing research on this topic I did read one extremely compelling argument on why we ought not to lie. Aristotle basically said a person who makes a defense for lying could never be trusted. (King.)
... led to a diversification of the people who create and maintain them. This can be anyone. Putting personal information into the hands of a stranger is risky outside of the Internet, but even more so online. The ease and speed of the mobility of information means no information is safe on Facebook. Anyone who can see it can copy, save, or redistribute the information at will. A broad and deep aggregate source of information makes search and retrieval of anything posted on Facebook quick and easy. If somebody wants information about you they know how and where to look. Finally, this information can be passed along and analyzed in order to draw conclusions about you and your lifestyle. These can be stereotypical and false. Facebook and other social media sites, and more broadly information technology in general has greatly impacted our lives and our right to privacy.
It makes people think that their each step is being tracked. When you go shopping, and buy a shaving razer, then you come home, log in to Facebook, and see the advertisement, specifically for you about this same razer. That makes you think “How do they know I am interested in it? Do they follow every step that I take?” With that said, Facebook should have its own “field” of play, Instagram its own, and credit card companies definitely need to be separate from all of this social media.
In this day and age, many individuals simply cannot go without some sort of socialization. Specifically speaking, most participate in online social networking sites. The most popular and used one is commonly known as Facebook. Facebook was created in 2004 by Mark Zuckerberg. By 2007, Facebook had over 21 million users, adding up to 1.6 billion page views every single day. The typical user spends over twenty minutes per day on Facebook and two thirds of the users log in every day at least once. It is not questionable as to why many people have a Facebook account. Facebook is generally efficient, easy for socialization, and not difficult to manage. Most organizations are affiliated with Facebook, as “almost 22,000 organizations had Facebook directories,” as of November 2006. A year after that in 2007, Facebook was named the seventh most popular website (Ellison 1). However, with anything well known, many oppose to using Facebook and hold criticism against the popular network. There are many flaws in the website and the relationships it starts online. Facebook is risking dangerous activities, ignoring privacy laws, and demeaning healthy socialization.