Personality Development Sociology

Susanna Anderson

Professor Ratliff

Sociology 101

13 October 2014

Born to my young, working-class parents in November of 1984, I was the last of four daughters. The first six months of my life were spent in my birthplace of Omaha Nebraska. Then my father took a job that moved my family to Rock Springs Wyoming. We continued to move every couple years, until finally settling down in Northern Colorado where I spent ten years before turning eighteen. By his early twenties, my father was honorably discharged from the army which paid for him to go to heating and air conditioning school. His hard work ethic, travel and overtime, allowed my mother to stay home and home school me and my three sisters. Though my family struggled financially, I did not

know my family was poor for many years.
As a homeschooler, most of my childhood was spent with my mother, sisters, other homeschoolers and animals. My parents had to be financially creative to provide me and my sisters with so many pets on a single income. They used the acres that we lived on in Wyoming to board horses in order to supplement the cost of animals. Our list of pets included horses, chickens, dogs, cats and Dutch rabbits. My sisters and I were responsible for taking care of our family pets. These responsibilities ranged from daily feeding and watering to breaking ice from the horse trough in the winter and freezing water in soda bottles to put in the rabbit cages in the summer. My parents created chore charts to manage our daily household tasks. Though we were home schooled, my mother wanted me and my three sisters to make friends outside the home. My mother frequently took my sisters and me on weekly trips to the VA hospital to visit with veterans because it was something important to her and it gave us a chance to get out of the house and socialize. We were also heavily involved in activities such as 4-H, Awana, church groups, sports and volunteering. My parents continued to struggle financially throughout my childhood and when I was in seventh grade my mother asked me to attend public school so that she could finish her nursing degree. I began attending public school in eighth grade, where I quickly learned my social status was important to my new peers. I did not dress like most of the other kids and my family couldn’t afford higher end fashion that the popular kids were wearing. In addition to looking different, I also socialized differently from my new peers. During my first year of public school, I experienced culture shock due to the behaviors of my peers, which were not the typical kind-hearted and friendly personalities that I was used to from my previous social encounters with other home schooled children and those who attended my church. Adjusting to new cultural and social norms I experienced in public school has taken me years.
Now a married adult, approaching my thirtieth birthday, the ways of socialization that I learned in public school have helped me in the workforce. For example, as a homeschooler I would have tried to relate to others by religion and in the workplace would have seemed overly friendly. Thankfully, I was taught in public school to reserve my openness. I contribute the ability to get a job in my field without a degree in part to learned social behavior from public school that made me seem more “normal” in interviews. I have been working as a graphic designer for the past seven years in spite of only having the education equivalent to an Associate’s degree. I aspire to finish the fine arts degree I started working on several years ago and have been going to night school for the past three semesters. I still have interest in volunteering for veterans which are a passion that was nurtured through both childhood and having family members who have served in both past and recent conflicts. My personality, interests and work ethic have been greatly shaped through my upbringing public school experiences. George Herbert Mead’s theory of social behaviorism suggests an individuals’ personality is developed through their social experiences (Macionis 107).
Meads’ central concept of personality development is the “self.” Mead believed that people were not born with their personalities, but that the “self” (the personality) is developed over time through socialization (Ratliff).

According to this theory, growing up in a white, blue-collar, religious family is the product that defines who I believe myself to be. If this theory is true, there would have been two vastly different social experiences that shaped my personality. The first would be my experience with homeschooling and learning gender roles from my mother. My mother cooked, cleaned and managed our studies. My sisters and I took on similar roles and were expected to help keep up the housework. There were explicit house rules that were clearly stated by my parents. Once I entered public school the social roles were no longer clear. I recognized that many of my peers were in higher social classes than I was. I learned quickly from my attire that I was not like some of the other kids. There were implicit rules about who I was not supposed to acknowledge in the hallways, or sit at the cafeteria tables with. Placed into this new setting, I struggled to find my peer group. My clothing was not fashionable and in attempt to fit-in, I began changing the way I dressed as quickly as I could afford to. Mead believed that “social experience is the exchange of symbols” (Macionis 107). With my home school peers, symbols were straightforward and parents were role models. Conversely,

public school symbols were complicated and role models varied depending on which social circle you conformed to. In public school, the kids would segregate by dress, social class and interests. Nothing could have prepared me for the culture shock of going from home school to public school. Public school kids looked at me differently than the home school ones in the past. Being accepting was normal in home school groups, but making friends in public school often meant looking a certain way either in beauty or dress. Mead believed that there were two parts of the “self”. One part is the “I”, which relates to who the individual thinks he or she is while the second, the “me” self is who others perceive of an individual. My view of the “I” self stems from my upbringing (Macionis 108).
In my home school years, I saw myself (the “I” self) as someone special because of the constant praise from the adults in my life, especially my mother. I assumed that meant I was seen in a positive light by others. My mother’s explicit uplifting messages convinced me to believe that I could do anything with my life. When I began attending public school however, the way I saw myself began to change. I began to question who I was, if I was special, all while attempting to understand the social and cultural norms of my new atmosphere. Though this was an emotional and difficult time, eventually finding a peer group was gratifying but did not happen for me until ninth grade. I learned more about myself, and perhaps developed into a new self, through this experience and came out of it with friends who I am still in close contact with over a decade later. These friends were able to relate to me and offer me the acceptance I was desperately looking for by making me feel they understood my heart.
Mead described the way others understand who a person is as the “me” self (Macionis 108). Having two unique social experiences my intentions were likely interpreted by peers in my home school differently from peers in public school. Most homeschoolers I socialized with were also raised in a religious upbringing. This upbringing centered on the golden rule, treating others as you would like to be treated. Peers also from home school likely viewed my intentions the way that they viewed their own selves because of the common values we shared. Common interests included becoming like our parents, raising families and getting married. When I began public school and entered the workforce, I learned new social norms and values. Gaining economic success was a common driving force and suddenly being a stay at home mom didn't seem quite as important or imperative. Initially entering this phase in my life, the “me” self, as seen by others, was unlikely so black and white as my socialization with other home school children. Some may have seen my innocence to be endearing, while others saw it as a sign of weakness. Once I entered public school as well as the job force, there were unbelievable amounts of norms, symbols and folkways I needed to adapt to.
Having two vastly different socialization experiences from childhood to adult hood along with having to learn new sets of social behaviors, symbols and norms, ultimately caused me to question the values that I was taught in the home vs.

the new judgments I learned in public school. According to Mead’s theory of “self” my personality developed as a result of being socialized in two environments. The shaping of the “self” just begins to scratch the surface of Meads theory which continues through learned socialization such as imitation, play, games and acquisition of generalized other. In my experiences with socialization I learned to adapt and grow from a variety of situations and challenging circumstances, in the end learning that no matter how others view me what matters is that I know I can overcome situations of adversity. I have the past to prove it. The late Maya Angelou said “If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your

attitude.”

Works Cited
Macionis, John. "Socialization." Sociology. Arapahoe Community College ed. Boston: Pearson Education, 212. 107-108. Print.
Ratliff, Professor. "Socialization." Sociology 101 Lecture. Arapahoe Community College, Littleton. 29 Sept. 2014. Lecture.