Personal Narrative: The Seeber Family

sat in the waiting room with my head between my knees waiting for what felt like years. Colten Joel Seeber, the newest addition to the Seeber Family wouldn't be as new as I thought. He passed away on June 8th 2014 due to a complication known as stillbirth, known for carrying a child in the womb for the full term, but then complications happen and the baby dies before it is able to arrive. The reality of knowing that we would be bringing our brother home in a box rather than a car seat, wasn't what I had in mind. The death of my brother caused my family to split apart and not be close knit as we used to. There were many stages of grief happen at once, and my family didn't know what to do to try to comfort each other, in the end we all broke

away. As a way to cope with the death a counselor at the hospital had recommended grief counseling. Being 14, I didn't feel like attending a group with sad people to have them feel sorry for me and me for them. Instead, to cope I began to conflict pain on myself. I felt that it was the only way that I could deal with this. June 8th comes around, as does the sadness that some would expect. Moping around the house turned into my dad saying that we needed a to remember him, and being sad was not an option. We piled into the car and drove to the beach which became the new tradition when June 8th comes around on the calendar. As well as buying balloons, adding a message and letting them go in hope that they reach the gates. A year later and you would think that everything would be back to normal, not to me. I was still cutting and going in a downward spiral. my grades started to slip and I didn't care anymore. It wasn't until my dad bought a home in Rescue to begin a new chapter and move on from this. I ended up switching schools and finding who I was. I no longer cut myself and later accepted the fact that this had happened for a reason, and there was nothing in my power that I could do to change it. I had later meet someone that helped me realize who I wanted to be, even if she doesn't realize it.