I was sitting in the back seat of my mother’s van, as I did every Wednesday, while we drove to church. There had always been a quiet hum of gospel music playing, It had been there so long you would have thought the music was built into it. The van was a bit old, but it had a mesmerizing vibe. The church was like a second home to me. The familiar smell that lingered with you, but you’d never think it had existed, until you got the scent of it. I had gone to many different churches, but the smell of them was the only thing that stuck with me. They all smelt the same, felt the same; but today felt different. My sister had been asleep ever since she got in the van. It never bothered my Mom or myself, but my Dad was a different story. Dad thought …show more content…
it was extremely disrespectful to just fall asleep wherever you wished, and he had told Jordan on multiple occasions of his belief; but still she remained asleep. To say that this was a “recurring issue” was an understatement, but she had never been this quiet, this stillness was vexing me. I did what I always had, and I shook lightly on her shoulder, but she didn’t budge. She was almost catatonic but barely managed to stay on her feet long enough to go into the church building; even then I was truly awed when she lay down and slept on one of the church pews. My parents were both furious, their voices were knives in my ears, and they were frantically pulling us out of the church, before anyone saw. As they pulled both of us into the car, my dad questioned Jordan for behaving in such an unacceptable manner, she mumbled something that sounded like ‘I’m tired’. He pressed for more answers, and asked “why are you tired?” She stated, “I took my medicine.” My dad then asked, “how much of it did you take?” She responded, “all of it.” After she said that I was baffled, consequently I realized that this ‘tiredness’ was actually Jordan experiencing the aftermath of an overdose. Mother started the vehicle, and began to sob while my dad put Jordan’s seat belt on and then clicked his own as well.
I had to ride in shotgun because my dad rode in the back with my sister. We arrived at the emergency room where hospital interns picked up my sister and took her and my parents to a room to do some tests. I sat in the waiting room, alone. I learned that hospitals have a feeling too, nothing like gospel music in your mother’s minivan, or the smell that is left on your mind after a church service. It’s the feeling you get whenever you don’t know how a story plays out, whether you’ll still have a sister in the end; one who is …show more content…
alive. Hours seemed to fly by, nevertheless I remained waiting, hoping that this wasn’t the last day I could tease my sister and remember all the fun we had together, without regretting all the time we didn’t; the feeling of anxiety was palpable.
It felt like my new home was curled up in this uncomfortable hospital chair, when all the sudden my parents came out, and told me “she’s going to survive!” They explained that by some miracle, she had taken two bottles of medicine that balanced each other out; she would sleep for a few days on and off. She had to stay at the hospital for two days and she was the focal point for the next few weeks after, but I didn’t lose my sister that day. Life is unpredictable, you could lose someone important to you in a matter of seconds, this event made me more pliable to life. So always have a second piece of cake, or go climb that mountain, make your life matter, and never take people for
granted.
The sanctuary was bare, and the pews hard. I mentally tallied a comparison between my own church's sanctuary and this. The two, I found, were similarly austere, but with theirs tending toward items of religious kitsch and our own tending instead towards polished brass. Both lacked stained glass in the windows. I suspected, however, that where our sanctuary was plain in token tribute to the long-dead strict streak of our Calvinist tradition, theirs was bare because it could not economically be otherwise. And the lack of air conditioning ! Memphis' summer heat is unbearable and pervasive, and a roof overhead does nothing against the big blanket of humid air.
I hid my face as I sat desperately alone in the back of the crowded church and stared through blurry eyes at the stained glass windows. Tears of fear and anguish soaked my red cheeks. Attempting to listen to the hollow words spoken with heartfelt emotion, I glanced at his picture, and my eyes became fixed on his beloved dog. Sudden flashes of sacred memories overcame me. Memories of soccer, his unforgettable smile, and our frequent exchange of playful insults, set my mind spinning. I longed only to hear his delighted voice once more. I sat for what seemed like hours in that lonely yet overcrowded church; my tears still flowed, and I still remembered.
Imagine my trepidation, then, when I walked into this church, with its high, vaulted ceilings and an enormous, emaciated, and slightly malicious-looking Christ figure suspended thirty feet among my head. As I came through the entrance, the prelude began. It sounded like nothing less than the soundtrack to a horror movie, as the slasher is about to leap out and dice an innocent schoolgirl. The organ wailed in threatening, building minor chords and did nothing to allay my trepidation.
As I sat this morning reading this article, I thought of the many times, I, Personally have battled this "abyss". I know what it's like because I have been there. I don't and I may not fully understand or comprehend to understand what you have gone through in your life Halie, yet, I really want you to know that I am here for you, and that I love you no matter what. There is a personal story that I share and have shared many times in my course of missionary service. It's a story about a man. It goes something like this;
As my friend Jenni and I entered the hall of the big church, a feeling of apprehension overwhelmed us. Our feelings were soon comforted when we entered a sea of smiling faces and outstretched hands. A sense of belonging engulfed us. Ms. Shirley, an older colored woman was first to extend her arms. She did not know us from Adam, but it did not matter. She threw her arms around us. "You girls have the prettiest smiles", she declared. "I am so glad you came to be with us this morning." Words can not describe what the act of kindness did to our feelings of apprehension, and that was just the beginning.
Destiny can be generally regarded as predestined. The experience of studying in America, attending Christian school, serving others as well as Christianity study was parts of God's plan, which I believe was what God meant for me.
Some people, some great people deserve to live forever, or at least die in a worthy or in a fulfilling way. I just got the short end of the bargain, I just got one of the worst things on this earth, cancer. Anyone can get the disease, but the way I see it, it seems unfair and unruly that pure souls could end up with a painful and undeserving demise. Unfortunately, I was one of those pure souls.
The struggle of not being able to breathe properly, gasping for air while the fever inside was killing me little by little and my fragile self in the age of four did not know what was happening to me I was brain dead, more like clueless little kid almost having a near death experience of having a seizure that in the end it changed my life and the way I looked at it because God gave me another chance to actually prove to him that I can be someone in my life and grateful to be alive today knowing that I have family that actually loves me for who I am.
Music is one of the most fantastical forms of entertainment. Its history stretches all the way from the primitive polyrhythmic drums in Africa to our modern day pop music we listen to on our phones. It has the ability to amaze us, to capture our attention and leave us in awe. It soothes the hearts of billions, and it is so deeply rooted in my life that it has touched my heart as well. Everyday I walk to the beat of the song stuck in my head and hum along to the melody. For me, to listen to music be lifted into the air by the hands of your imagination and float around for a while. You forget about your worries, your troubles and find peace within the sound. Every chapter in my life is attached with a song. Every time I listen to a certain song, thoughts of my past come flooding back
One thing that really bothers me is how much I changed. I used to play games all day, not focus on school, wouldn't get in serious trouble, and was very innocent compared to my present day self. There are cons and pros of my past self compared to how I am currently. I am more happy of how I am now then I am before. As time changes, so do I and I can not stop that. What’s done has already been done and can’t be changed so you always have to look towards the future and never the past. The past will not definite who you are today unless you let it. I would have never expect that I would be transferred to a continuation high school in my freshman year. It is a bad thing to many people, but I am thankful that I am sent to it because I will learn
...c ministry featured both the gospel music I had come to love at Lincoln Heights in addition to the hymns I grew up with at St. Margaret. The pastor believed that he was a sinner just like me and spoke of the church in terms of God’s people, versus a building. Most importantly, I felt a strong connection between myself and God and the other worshippers. They seemed to sense that I needed assistance in my spiritual odyssey, and reached out to me. Most of the congregation had attended Carmel Presbyterian for generations and were looking for new people to help rejuvenate the church. They openly embraced my family and we happily reciprocated. I had finally found a church home.
When I was younger I thought my sister was always going to be there. I never thought she would die so young. She died when I was in 5th grade so I was around 10 or 11 years old. We had our fights and now I wish more then anything that she was here. She missed my first homecoming, my graduation and many other important dates in my life and there is still more she will miss. Now that I'm the only child in my household, it’s terrible because...
Ever since I was a small child, I have loved music. The strong, steady beats, the
In March of 1998, my father was rushed to the hospital because of a heart attack. I remember getting home from basketball practice without my mother home. Instead, my sister was there with her children. The fact that my sister was there was familiar to me, but something did not seem right. My sister stayed with me and did not tell me what happened. Later that night, after my sister left, the news that followed would prepare me to encounter the most defining moment of my life.
In the early summer mornings, when the sunshine is young and playful, inside the church another realm is born. Sitting in the back rows one can see a heavenly mist flowing though the windows and filling the sleepy altar with life and hope. It is a different dimension in the breast of an unsuspecting world. Moments such as these bring you joy and reassurance and also show you that there really is someone out there: your soul is elevated, your mind is thirsty for new experiences and your body is strengthened.