Gender Socialization In The Media

Many thoughts ran through my head as I sat in my room crying wondering why I couldn’t go out and play boxing with the boys that day. I called out to my mom hoping she would give me a clear answer, but the only thing I got was “stay in and play with your dolls honey”. I believe that was the moment when Gender socialization affected me. Gender Socialization is the process of learning the social expectations and attitudes with one’s sex. Gender socialization is how we learn to act like girls and act like boys.

Gender Socialization seems like such a simple and harmless word, but once you uncover its meaning it can be harmful. Gender Socialization is one of the reasons why as a kid if I wanted to go play in mud with my brothers I couldn’t. But

why would a word be the reason I couldn’t do that? Well here’s why, gender socialization teachers the world that girls are supposed to be girls and boys are supposed to be boys. But it’s still all so confusing right? Let me make it a little more clear gender socialization is when your mom teachers you a young lady to be kind, graceful, calm and elegant whereas your brother to be fearless, tough, venturous and bold. Even if it doesn’t seem like you aren’t being taught these things they are unconsciously happening. For example every time you hear your mom scream for your dad to come and kill a spider you as a kid learn to do the exact same thing. This is an example of gender socialization because it shows that males are supposed to be tough and females are not so much.
Gender socialization doesn’t just only happen in the house it happens everywhere. I remember in middle school for the 8th grade dance they had issued a dress code stating girls wear girls’ clothing and boys wear boys clothing. But what does that really mean? Well according to gender socialization girls are supposed to wear pinks, dresses and tutus where a boys are prone to wear blues, suits, and ties. With that being said the school wanted to enforce gender socialization and wanted the girls to wear dresses and the boys to wear suits. For me that didn’t upset me, but at the time I had a friend who was transgender and she dress as a girl even though she was born as a boy. But in the eye of gender socialization she wasn’t allowed to wear a dress even though she saw herself as a girl because in the eyes of the public she was still a boy. So she didn’t go because she would have been forced to wear a suit because on the outside she was a boy. When situations like this happens with gender socialization no matter how we feel inside we must dress as the gender the world sees you as. In all honestly it plays a huge part in how people continue to dress themselves today. Girls are supposed to wear bright colors, dresses and bows whereas boys are supposed to wear darker colors, ties, and jeans. Anything outside the normal gender socializing rules are the people many would refer as outsiders.
It’s in our house, our schools and it is in the media.

Gender socialization in the media is seen all over the world. Women are seen supporting cooking, girls are seen playing dolls whereas the boys are seen working and playing with toy guns. Gender socialization teachers us that girls are supposed to love to cook, play with dolls, and clean where on the other hand guys are supposed to work, be rough and play with toy guns. I remember in middle school I use to watch my brother’s football practice and always thought I could do that. So one day I asked if I could come and play the coach said “Honey you’ll get killed out there girls aren’t supposed to play football” and the very next day the cheer coach asked me to join the team. Due to the simple fact that I was a girl I had to automatically want to cheer and couldn’t be a part of something so violent. That being said the reason why I couldn’t join the team was solely because of gender socialization. It teachers us that us girls are supposed to be the ones cheering on the boys again we are being elegant we aren’t supposed to be running around in the grass tackling people. Gender socialization teaches us that at a very young age girls aren’t supposed to be seen playing contact sports that’s why at a young girls are put in gymnastics and cheerleading. In those sports we prance around and look graceful. While on the other hand the boys are put into hockey and football where they get dirty, hurt and play

rough.
Honestly there isn’t a point in my life where gender socialization didn’t have some sort of impact on it. I remember my mom took everyone to target so we can pick out a bike. My sister picked out a pink bike that had little pom pom strings on the handle bars. My brothers went for a black bike that had pegs on the front and the back. But as far as me I wanted a bike that was just like my brothers. Once I went towards one and showed my mom that wasn’t happening. At first the boys said I couldn’t ride that bike because it was for boys and my mom pointed me towards a more girly bike like my sisters. During that time I was confused on why I could get it. After all I wanted it because I thought it was cool, but looking back I now know why. I couldn’t get that bike because it wasn’t pink and it didn’t look like something a girl should have. Gender socialization taught you as a girl that you should gravitate towards bright colors and pinks. It teaches you to choose the bike my sister choose because it was made for a girl it was pink it had little pom pom strings on the handle bars. It doesn’t teach a girl to choose a black bike that has pegs on the front and the back because that wasn’t made for a girl. A boys bike is made for them to be more risky on to do BMX tricks where as a girl is just supposed to just ride.
Everything you do leads back to gender socialization. Gender socialization teachers us how to be a girl who loves pink and how to be a boy who loves blue. It teaches us that as girls we are supposed to be submissive, pure, and angelic where as it teaches guys to be courageous, proactive, versatile and bold. Whether it’s being taught consciously or unconsciously we are being taught it every single day. But it’s not only teaching how we should hold ourselves it is also teaching us the things we can play with and what not to. It teaches us girls to play with dolls, baking toys and jump ropes while it teaches boys they like catch, play in the mud and with nurf guns. When giving a gift to a girl it cannot be something that violent, a baseball or even a toy car it has to be a doll, stuff animal or something to do with princesses. Same goes for a boy but opposite when giving him a gift it can’t be a doll it has to be a ball or a toy gun. At a very young age we are taught as girls that we wear pink and any other bright colors and boys where blue and any darker colors. So who giving clothing to girls we give them pinks, dresses and bows, but when giving clothing to boys we give them shirts, blues and shirts with cars on them.
Due to gender socialization I had to sit in my room while my brothers where outside playing boxing because that isn’t what girls do. Gender socialization taught my mom that girls play with dolls and she taught me the exact same thing whereas it taught guys to rough around. At times we may not know that we are doing it and in all honestly there isn’t a way of stopping it. Form the moment you are born to the end it is there. Gender socialization is one big never ending circle that teaches us to act our gender. Girls are supposed to be girls and boys are supposed to be boys. We can thank gender socialization for that.