Friendship Vs Professional Relationship Analysis

In Managing Social Service Staff for Excellence, Nancy Summers (2010) provides a list of “The Differences between a Professional Relationship and a Friendship” (p. 192). The very first item on the list states that a professional relationship puts the client first; whereas in a friendship, “each friend gives the support to the other” (p. 192). Hepworth, et al. (2013) also supports this by stating that professional boundaries intend to make “the client’s interest the primary focus” (p. 71). From my perspective, this is the main difference between a professional and personal relationship. As my field instructor has pointed out, in a professional relationship, it’s about the client’s needs. As social workers, we should not try to get anything

out of our relationship with the client. Yes, we find our own fulfillment and satisfaction from the social work profession. However, our needs are not the main focus when working with a client. We should not “engage in discussions with the [client] about [our] personal problems” (Summers, 2010, p. 192). Nor should we “argue with the [client] about the [client’s] values” (p. 192). Activities that are common in a friendship should not occur in a professional relationship. On the other hand, there is a high level of trust between a client and social worker. Working with a client also requires strong communications skills. Both traits are found in strong personal relationships. Yet, the trust and communication are not the same. For example, a social worker must build trust with a client in order for the client to disclose personal information. However, a social worker should not share the same amount of information with a client. Also, a client may take suggestions from a social worker on ways to work on a specific situation. Yet, a social worker would not take advice from a client or even disclose enough information for the client to give advice. The point is a professional relationship is about the client not the social worker.
Clients may seek out a specific social worker who shares their gender, culture, or age. This could be a benefit to both the client and the social worker. The social worker may not have to work as hard to build trust because the client may already trust someone who has similar traits as themselves. With this prebuilt trust, a client may be more comfortable and more willing to communicate with the social worker. The social worker may also feel more comfortable. He or she may feel that they will understand the client better, give more specific suggestions and resources, and communicate more effectively. Specifically, with gender, a client may be more willing to open up to a social worker of the same gender. The client may feel that the social worker will understand his or her perspective. Depending on the field, a social worker may also feel safer working with clients of the same gender. A client may also be more comfortable with someone from the same culture. The client may feel relieved that he or she doesn’t have to explain their culture to someone who doesn’t already know it. The social worker may be able to provide resources that best fit into the client’s culture. A social worker within the same age bracket of a client may be able to provide timely information for a client, as the social worker may also be going through a similar stage in life. A client may feel that a social worker in the same age group will understand references from certain years that the client talks about.
Conversely, clients may become too comfortable with the social worker or expect certain things due to the similarities.

A client may expect a social worker of the same gender to agree with their own perspective. For example, in a couple going to marriage counseling with a female social worker, the wife may expect the social worker to take her side, while the husband may expect to receive little support. A social worker could also push how they feel about their gender on a client. For example, a female social worker may not approve of how a female client dresses and expect the client to dress the way she does or did at that client’s age. A client who is from the same culture as the social worker may expect the social worker to follow cultural norms, even if those norms are not in line with the NASW’s Code of Ethics. A social worker with a similar cultural background as a client may only offer certain resources, assuming the client will only accept resources that fit into the culture. Clients in the same age bracket as a social worker may feel the social worker is more of a friend and the social worker may find it difficult to earn the respect of a

client.
Differences can have both a positive and negative impact. A client with a social worker of a different gender may initially be uncomfortable with disclosure. But, as sessions continue, the client may find that the social worker provides a perspective different than what the client is used to. A social worker with a client from a different culture may not know certain characteristics of the culture and may have to ask the client, colleague, or do research. Yet, the social worker may also provide the client with resources that they client never thought of looking into due to cultural norms. A client with a social worker of a different age may not feel the social worker knows what he or she is talking about. Clients older than their social workers may feel like the social worker is still a child and doesn’t know anything about life. Conversely, clients younger than their social worker may feel that the social worker isn’t aware of current situations facing youth and may think the social worker can’t help them. Yet, a social worker of a different age may be able to provide insight that the client never considered.
I have had experience with all of these variables.

The clients I currently work with are young female mothers in the foster care system. The clients all currently live in independent living, but have not yet been emancipated. I have had positive and negative experiences involving both age and culture. Because I am approximately only eight years older than the clients (and many of them initially assumed I was even younger), the clients were willing to be open with me. I believe that it was partially due to the small age gap that a client specifically requested to have individual sessions with me. However, I have also had issues with being so close in age to the clients. Things that the clients say, such as curse words, they will try to hide from my supervisor or another older intern. They will whisper it or attempt to say it when neither of them is in the room. Yet, when I am there, they will blatantly say whatever they want. I understand that this and other issues that I have encountered are due to lack of respect. While they are willing to trust and open up to me, I have found it difficult to receive respect from this group of clients because they see me as someone in their age

bracket.
I have also had difficulty due to the difference in culture. I understand that foster care has its own culture. I know very little about this culture. I had a family member who used to foster babies, but that I was rarely a part of that situation. My information about the foster care system is limited and what I know about independent living, having children while in foster care, and emancipation is even less. While this hasn’t been specifically brought up by the clients, I feel that I could help them better if I knew more about what they were going through.
The similarity in age I can use to my benefit. As I have stated before, the clients are more willing to speak and work with me due to my age. However, my age has also led to issues regarding respect. My field instructor has often said that this is because the clients are testing me to see how much they can get away with during group sessions. In order to respond to these “tests” in a way where I gain respect, I need to learn the proper skills. This will come from classes like this one, supervision with my field instructor, and research on my own. During my supervision, I have spoken with my field instructor about my concerns surrounding respect in the group sessions. She has provided me with suggestions, websites, and books that have helped.
Regarding the culture of foster care, I can speak to my supervisor, do research, and also speak to the case manager who brings the clients for group sessions. I do not think it would help my lack of respect to ask the clients themselves. Also, I don’t want to generalize one client’s specific situation to all other clients. Receiving an overview from the case manager or my supervisor, I feel would be the best option.