Chapter Summaries In chapters 9 and 13 in “The Spirit of Intimacy” by Somé, she discusses how the Western society has constructed an illusion of romance. This illusion of romance is presented in our media such as television, movies, and social media. She believes that basing a relationship off of romance leads people to mask their true selves which eventually leads to issues in the relationships long term. By building a relationship based on a spiritual connection, it allows individuals to build their relationship from the bottom up, be honest with themselves as well as their partners, and helps people better understand their partners in order to have a happy and fulfilled relationship. Furthermore, Somé discusses homosexuality and how her village refers to gays and lesbians as the gatekeepers. They live on the edge of both the spiritual and the village world. The gatekeepers serve as mediators for men and women so they are able to better understand each other in their daily lives. There are two different groups of gatekeepers, one possess the ability to protects a limited number of gates including the elements such as water, earth, fire, mineral, and nature because they vibrate the energies of those gates. The second …show more content…
In the LGBT community, they develop intimate relationships in the same stages as heterosexual couples however they resolve conflicts more positively. Due to them being in a relationship with the same-sex partner, they approach roles in a relationship and marriage using egalitarianism. We all give and receive love differently. Knox & Schacht discuss the different types of loves styles a person’s desires from their relationships such as ludic, pragma, eros, mania, storge, and agape. These different love styles also express how lovers can understand and relate to one
He also discusses how love and the desire for commitment play a big part in the argument for and against gay marriage. Stoddard begins his argument successfully with pathos, or emotional appeal, to attain the reader’s empathy for those who have been deprived of a loved one. The story tells of a woman named Karen Thompson, who was basically married, but not legally, to her female partner; when Thompson’s partner was in a critical car accident, her partner’s parents completely cut Thompson off from all contact with their daughter. Had the two women been married, they would not have had to deal with such heart-throbbing pain. This example is effective in presenting how marriage “can be the key to survival, emotional and financial” (Stoddard, 1988, p. 551).
The first chapter begins with an exploration of love and marriage in many ancient and current cultures. Surprisingly many cultures either avoid the discussion of love in marriage or spit on the idea completely. China and other societies believed that love was simply a product of marriage and shouldn’t get too out of hand, while a few Greek and Roman philosophers shunned excessive
Relationships can be discussed in all aspect of life. Including communities, families, marriage, conflicts, and divorce. The gift of any relationship is the gifts from the spirits. The author uses her African teachings, in comparison to how Americans handle different relationships. In the book, “The Spirit of Intimacy,” Sobonfu Some’s gives wisdom insightful experience of her marriage and about the Dagara people of West African beliefs and traditions when facing conflicts in leading to divorcement.
Love and affection is an indispensable part of human life. In different culture love may appear differently. In the poem “My god my lotus” lovers responded to each other differently than in the poem “Fishhawk”. Likewise, the presentation of female sexuality, gender disparity and presentation of love were shown inversely in these two poems. Some may argue that love in the past was not as same as love in present. However, we can still find some lovers who are staying with their partners just to maintain the relationship. We may also find some lovers having relationship only because of self-interest. However, a love relationship should always be out of self-interest and must be based on mutual interest. A love usually obtains its perfectness when it develops from both partners equally and with same affection.
For example, “sociological and popular understanding of gay and lesbian relationships has been greatly distorted by the false presumption that only heterosexual relationships are normal ways of expressing sexual intimacy and love” (Andersen 1997, 95). This explains how society helps in influencing and identifying people sexual identities throughout their lifetime. Andersen admits that “heterosexual identity includes the belief that men have an overpowering sex drive and that women are considered more loving, soft and are link to sex [… and] contemporary sexual attitudes are shaped by phallocentric thinking-that which sees men as powerful and women as weak” (Andersen 1997, 94, 96). Although, society is lead to believe that men should be the dominant figure of the family. The reality is that, in gay and lesbian relationships, no one individual displays the behavior of an authoritative
An in-depth discussion of same-sex female desire is essential to a well-rounded understanding of historical sexuality as well as for representation in historical study for queer-identifying students. Accounts of lesbianism exist throughout history, however, historians have only recently begun studying the evidence of these relationships due to social taboos and fewer available sources than exist as examples of male homosexuality. The field of study on lesbianism in medieval Europe is scant but nevertheless present. Primary sources include laws, court cases, and letters from the period which support the widely held social constructionist view that sapphic relationships existed despite the lack of a unified lesbian social identity; these, in
The Symposium, The Aeneid, and Confessions help demonstrate how the nature of love can be found in several places, whether it is in the mind, the body or the soul. These texts also provide with eye-opening views of love as they adjust our understanding of what love really is. By giving us reformed spectrum of love, one is able to engage in introspective thinking and determine if the things we love are truly worthy of our sentiment.
Intimacy and love are important factors to interpersonal relationship but as a foundation to not governing and controlling society. Consider a situation of three-person group, or also known as a triad, intimacy and love is not successful majority of time (Freidkin 05/20/10). Take for example, a family of three, a father, mother, son or daughter, has unconditionally love for each other. However, as the teenager grows up, he or she may not always agree with the parents' decisions about their life; and/or vice versa, in which the parents may not like the teenager's lifestyle. This shows that we tend to hold other with high regards and respect when we love another. Also, when we love others, we want the best for them and help them make better decisions to have better relations with the party. In relation to society, intimacy and love are not ideal features because they are too personal; not everyone will let others control their lives and surroundings willingly for strangers. For those who have conflicting beliefs with higher personnel will feel that some choice...
Unlike sex, the history of sexuality is dependant upon society and limited by its language in order to be defined and understood.
Note: This paper has a very long Annotated Bibliography. In recent years, same-sex relationships have become more encompassing in US society. State legislation is changing such as accepting gay marriages, enforcing anti-discrimination laws, and legal gay adoptions; the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender community is becoming public. Gay-headed families, like heterosexuals, are diverse and varying in different forms.
Milstein, Susan A. Taking Sides Clashing Views in Human Sexuality. Ed. William J. Taverner and Ryan W. McKee. New York: McGraw-Hill, 2009. Print.
The definition of a relationship has changed so many times in the past decades. It has gone from a connection between two people to an obsession and almost a competition. In today’s world a relationship consists of major intimacy and closeness. There are some who believe that intimacy while dating is wrong. They form their own definition of a relationship into what they call a “godly relationship”. Those supporting that kind of a relationship condemn sexual closeness and monitor who their young people are allowed to date. There are two worlds of dating in our lives today; one with infatuation and the other with togetherness.
Gender is a socially constructed phenomenon, and how acceptable one’s relationship is determined by society’s view of gender roles. Because the majority of the population is characterized as heterosexual, those who deviate from that path are ...
Halwani, Raja, Gary Jaeger, James Stramel, Richard Nunan, William Wilkerson, and Timothy Murphy. What Is Gay and Lesbian Philosophy? 2008. MS. Oxford, UK. San Diego Mesa College Academic Databases. Web. 10 Oct. 2011. .
One of the eight concepts is “Eros” or Erotic love, which represents sexual passion and desire— typically falling under romantic relationships. Eros is mostly based on sexual feelings and desires rather than anything else. The next type of love is “Philia” or Affectionate love, which describes the love of friends—especially ones that experienced hard times with each other. This type of love is free from romance, but mostly focuses on loyalty. In addition, “Storge” or Familial love symbolizes natural love between family, principally between parents and children. Like “Philia” it is also free of romance. The fourth type of love in Greek society is “Ludus” or Playful love that symbolizes a playful form of love, for example, between lovers. Every relationship should maintain the playful form to retain a fresh relationship and to stray away from always being serious. The fifth type of love is “Mania” or Obsessive love, which a person becomes jealous because they want love and to be loved. This love can lead to many problems in a romantic or interpersonal relationship because of jealousy. Next is “Pragma” or Enduring love, which symbolizes a matured love over time. Furthermore, this relationship has passed physical touches— but developed into a casual, loving relationship. Does not only include marriages, but friendships that have occurred for a long time. Moreover, “Philautia” or Self love occurs when we love ourselves regardless of anything. The Greeks acknowledged that we must first love ourselves before we can demonstrate love to anyone else. We cannot share what we do not obtain, we must first love ourselves (Sol, 2016). Additionally, the eighth type of Greek love is “Agape” or Selfless love, which is unconditional love. Out of all the types of loves, it is the purest due to the reason it does not expect anything. Regardless of how many mistakes or flaws a person has,