Establishing Power, Control and Authority Through Domestic Violence

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Domestic violence can affect anyone. Domestic violence is a pattern of behavior used to establish power and control over another through emotional attack, fear, and intimidation. Domestic violence or battering, often, includes the threat or use of violence; this violence is a crime. Battering occurs when one person believes he/she is entitled to control another. Domestic violence affects people in all social, economic, racial, religious, and ethnic groups; whether the couple is married, divorced, living together, or still dating. Another reality is that abusers and their victims can be gay, strait, young, or old. Violence develops from verbal, physical, emotional, financial, and sexual abuse. Most domestic violence victims are women by men, but that doesn’t suggest that others cannot be battered or are perpetrators of abuse -- such as women on men, or same sex abuse. Battering or domestic violence, is now mutual and it is not a ‘couple’s quarrel’. Disagreements arise occasionally in all relationships, but battering involves every aspect of a relationship. While physical violence is the “enforcer” or the criminal act, other behaviors erode the partner or victim’s sense of self, self-determination, and free will; this is ultimately lethal for many women. Often batterers possess a low self-esteem and gain a sense of power by means of humiliating and controlling their partner. Control techniques can include verbal insults intended to bring down the partner’s self-esteem, threats meant to scare the partner into obedience, or mind games aimed at making the victim feel unsure and weak. Batterers who use physical abuse push, slap, pinch, grab, or use other demonstrations of physical strength to show that they have power in the relationship and to keep the partner from exercising control over their own life. Abusers often show extreme possessiveness of their partner, wanting there their partner to account for time spent away from home or on the phone. Furthermore, sexual abuse further serves to weaken the spirit of the victim and to show that the abuser has total authority. These forms of abuse are but a fraction of the tactics used by batterers to dominate the partner. The physical form of domestic violence includes pushing, shoving, slapping, hitting with a fist, kicking, choking, grabbing, pinching, pulling hair, or threatening with weapons. Another fo... ... middle of paper ... ... had to forgo financial security during divorce proceedings to avoid further abuse. Therefore, the battered are more likely to be impoverished, as they grow older. Domestic violence is a serious dilemma in today’s society. The only answer toward preventing domestic violence should start when we raise our children. Violence is a learned behavior. When children get hit, they learn something in that process. They ascertain that when frustrated or angry, it is OK to take out that frustration and anger on someone else. They learn that violence is OK. Violence then becomes a learned behavior. The only way to promote a non-violent society is to teach children non-violent habits. Works Cited Buzawa, Carl G. and Buzawa, Eve S. Second Edition: Domestic Violence. Sage Publications, Inc.; Thousand Oaks, California. 1996 Knudsen, Dean D. and Miller, JoAnne L. Abused and Battered: Social and Legal Responses to Family Violence. Aldine De Gruyter, Inc.; New York. 1991. Endnotes Buzawa p.19 Knudsen p.18 Knudsen p.135 Buzawa p.14 Buzawa p.02 Knudsen p.188 Knudsen p.191 Knudsen p.89 Knudsen p.90 Knudsen p.123 Buzawa p.82 Knudsen p.108 Knudsen p.103 Knudsen p.112

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