This paper analysis explores the concept of deception used by Greg when trying to impress his soon to be fiancé’s parents within the movie Meet the Parents. Throughout the paper, deception will be discussed in relationship to how this concept was demonstrated within the movie. Additionally, the meaning of deception will be addressed along with it’s consequences, strengths and weaknesses, and alternative approaches that can be used when communicating. In the film, a male nurse named Greg Focker goes to meet his girlfriend’s parents in hopes of asking her father for his permission before he proposes. His girlfriend, Pam, has a hard to please and suspicious father named Jack. Throughout the course of the movie, Greg makes several attempts to gain …show more content…
Jack’s approval. However, Greg fails miserably, leaving a bad impression on Jack. For instance, Greg accidentally lets out Jack’s beloved cat, Jinx. The cat soon runs away and Greg is in a complicated situation, having to figure out how to get Jinx back without loosing Jacks’s approval. When trying to gain Jack’s approval by finding Jinx, Greg uses deception.
According to McCornack (2010), deception is defined as “deliberately using uninformative, untruthful, irrelevant, or vague language for the purpose of misleading others” (p. 206). Deception is not the same as a misunderstanding which is when a person misperceives another’s thoughts or feelings expressed during verbal communication. Deception is deliberate whereas a misunderstanding is unintentional. Deception can take many forms. For instance, individuals may think that deception most commonly occurs when one person communicates false information to another person such as telling your roommate that you did not eat the last piece of pizza when in fact you did. However, the most frequent form of deception which does not involve saying any false information is concealment. When someone uses concealment, they discard important and relevant information out of verbal messages to hide what ever information they desire. This form of deception is practiced more frequently than all other forms combined (McCornack, 2010). Additionally, deception is commonly used by others when communicating online. For example, individuals on chatrooms, social networking sites, or those who use email or text feel it is easier to lie online, make indirect or ambiguous statements, conceal information, and exaggerate or understate the truth in order to mislead the recipient. For instance, many people exaggerate certain physical …show more content…
features on online dating sites such as height and others can even take advantage of people through online scams. Within the movie, Greg spray paints an adopted Himalayan cat’s tail all black in order to make the cat look like Mr. Jinx who recently went missing, putting Jinxy’s collar on an impostor. Greg soon brings the cat home to Jack who is very worried. Jack is very pleased to see that “Mr. Jinx” is safe and calls Greg “the man of the hour.” Jack praises Greg and tells him that he is now back in the “circle of trust.” However, this excitement is short lived. Jack becomes suspicious when he receives a call from his neighbor stating that they found Jinx. Jack picks up the fake “Mr. Jinx”, taking a closer look at the cat and soon discovers that he has been lied to by Greg. Jack reacts with anger and Pam becomes extremely disappointed with Greg. Jack tells Greg that he should leave his house. Greg then goes to the airport and starts to head home (De Niro, Roach, 2000). In this scene, Greg deceives Jack, leading him to believe that Mr.
Jinx has been found and is now safe. He deliberately uses untruthful and vague information to make it seem like he rescued Jinx at an animal shelter. Furthermore, Greg takes his lie to the next step by deliberately attaching Jinx’s collar to the to imposture and spray painting the cat’s tail black in hopes to trick Jack. When Jack found out that Greg lied, large negative consequences were created on both, Greg’s relationship with Jack and Greg’s relationship with Pam. Additionally, communication senders, such as Greg, who manipulate messages so that they are no longer truthful participate in unethical communication, deviating from the cooperative principle. Greg’s communication was far from being informative, honest, relevant, and clear. Therefore, his use of deception proved to be destructive and impractical. At the time, it may have seemed easier to lie than state the truth. However, deception additionally calls for more deception (McCornack, 2010). Greg was so caught up in trying to gain Jack’s approval, that he did what was ever necessary at the time to try to receive Jack’s acceptance. Greg’s web of deception accumulated and caused intense disappointment and anger which almost lead to a relationship breakup with Pam who he planned on
marrying. However, even though Greg chose to communicate in an unethical way, he had no malicious intent. When communicating with Jack, he did so out of hopes to gain his approval and had good intentions to ask him for Pam’s hand in marriage. He only wanted to gain Jack’s respect and did not mean to hurt anyone in the process. On the other hand, Greg was ambiguous, leaving out important details on how he really found “Mr. Jinx” and should have not used the fake cat as a “temporary solution”. Instead, Greg should have owned up for his mistakes by apologizing to Jack and Pam for misleading the two of them. By taking ownership of the blame for loosing Mr. Jinx, promptly acknowledging his faults, and admitting responsibility, Greg would avoided many of the negative consequences that were created by his use of deception. It would have been a much better approach to own up to his mistake and move on instead of lying to Jack. Deception is an unethical concept that results in negative strains on relationships. This paper explored the many forms of deception in relationship to the movie, Meet the Parents. Additionally addressed was how Greg used deception to deliberately mislead Jack and the relational outcomes that consequently occurred. Through analyzing the concept of deception, one could learn that not all deception is malicious. It is additionally important to be aware of the fact that some cultures, especially collectivistic cultures, view ambiguous and indirect communication as an aspect of their verbal communication. Finally, it is critical to not only be consciously aware of others use of deception so that you are not mislead, but additionally your use of deception so you do not mislead others and cause negative relational outcomes.
Deception-the act of deceiving; state of being deceived; artifice practiced; fraud; double-dealing; to mislead the mind of; to impose on; to delude; fraud; guile; cunning (Webster Dictionary). Deception is universal and serves many purposes. Deception can be used to hurt or protect, depending on the motives of the deceptor. In Orson Scott Card's novel, Ender's Game, deception plays many roles. The main use of deception is the adults versus the children. Early on in the novel it is indicated that Ender already realizes adults lie when the subject of the monitor being removed is discussed. The adults are also deceptive when they remove the monitor and allow Ender to think he was not accepted into the program when in fact they just wanted to see how he would behave without the monitor.
Viorst opens her article by explaining social lies. She describes these as lies to avoid hurt, such as lying to a cousin by pretending to enjoy dinner. Judith believes they are necessary and acceptable; without them, relationships would be icky and short. By being honest and not telling white lies a person can come off harsh. Furthermore, Viorst thinks that not telling social lies is arrogant.
As John Ruskin once said, “The essence of lying is in deception, not in words.” This essence is debated in “The Ways We Lie”, written by Stephanie Ericsson, and “Doubts about Doublespeak”, written by William Lutz. In “The Ways We Lie”, Ericsson talks about the different ways people lie on a day to day basis. By comparison, in “Doubts about Doublespeak”, Lutz discusses the different forms of doublespeak that many individuals frequently use. Lutz considers doublespeak as a language that distorts the meaning of words in order to deceive another person, and only “pretends to communicate” (83). Although both authors agree that lying is about the use of deceptive language, Ericsson describes this use of language as occasionally being necessary,
Are everyday rituals, such as, facades reflected as to being a lie? Simply preparing for a meeting or interview does not come off as lying, although another type of façade such as when someone asks, “Are you okay,” after a death of someone close to you, in reality it is a form of a lie, because you are not being honest. In Stephanie Erricsson’s article “The Ways We Lie,” she discusses many different types of lying, that most wouldn’t even consider. Ericsson claimed, “But façades can be destructive because they are used to seduce others into an illusion” (409). Depending how a façade is used, the outcome can be beneficial or damaging. There are facades that are used to cover up one’s true feelings, in order to protect an individual and then there is a type in which one puts on a mask to cover up how awful of a person they are. Charity, a former friend, deceived me with the qualities of everything she was not, my mom is a great example of when it comes to hiding when she is saddened. In this article “The Ways We Lie,” Stephanie Ericsson has a great point of view on the destructiveness of facades, although, it can very well be used in a good way just as much as in a bad way, in fact, like my protective mother, using facades for mine and my sisters own good and then a conniving friend using facades in
In individual searches to find themselves, Frank and April Wheeler take on the roles of the people they want to be, but their acting grows out of control when they lose sense of who they are behind the curtains. Their separate quests for identity converge in their wish for a thriving marriage. Initially, they both play roles in their marriage to please the other, so that when their true identities emerge, their marriage crumbles, lacking communication and sentimentality. Modelled after golden people or manly figures, the roles Frank and April take on create friction with who they actually are. Ultimately, to “do something absolutely honest” and “true,” it must be “a thing … done alone” (Yates 327). One need only look inside his or her self to discover his or her genuine identity.
Deception is defined as a crafty procedure or practice meant to deceive or defraud. People tend to view this as a sinister action. No matter how sinister it can be, it can also be utilized to gain information and knowledge. How a person uses deception varies among different people. Generally, the cleverer people tend to utilize deception very efficiently.
Stephanie Ericsson’s The Ways We Lie, analyzes and reflects on how lying has simply become the norm in our society. We all lie, there is not one person in the world that does not lie. Most people lie because they are afraid of telling the truth, however what they do not know is telling a lie can lead them in the wrong direction because many things can happen when lying to a person. The person can find out when everything unravels that person will not have trust in you and you would be known as a liar. To every action there is a consequence, so why not deal with just one consequence when telling the
Author Allison Kornet in her article (1997) “The Truth about Lying: Has Lying Gotten a Bad Rap” states that deception or lying has become a part of everyone’s life. A person lies or deceives as often as he brushes his teeth or combs his hair. Many psychologists have neglected or ignored the concept of deception or lying and its effects on everyone’s life. Kornet explains that in the previous two to three decades, the psychologists started noticing or analyzing the effects of a person’s deception on others or why a person lies so many times in his day-to-day life. The person might learn lying from childhood
Further , it was also due to a small truth that would cover a big lie. An instance, is that a woman could say that a muffin looks pretty. These lies women tell could be risky ´, but they are used in order to not hurt the person who is receiving the lie. This was also noticed in Meyer's ted talk when she mentioned when there were two patterns of deceptions. The first one was an interview that was conducted with Bill clinton . The tell tales of his interview showed that he used a non contacted denial and a distanced language. The second deception is that liars are known to freeze their upper
People face ethical dilemmas every day. But it is perhaps, most prevalent in the law enforcement profession. Law enforcement officers face ethical dilemmas constantly. Some of the ethical issues that police face each day are: racial profiling, officer discretion, police officer loyalty, police officer abuse, and interrogatory deception. This paper will discuss the purpose of interrogatory deception, ways in which it is used, some of the current debates over the practice, and a landmark ruling in the Miranda case of 1966 which attempted to cease the use of intimidation and coercion practices of the police.
At the same time, however, even though people have the tendency to be dishonest, not all lies are legally prosecutable. When asked to judge another person’s appearance, for example, some tend to lie in favor of that person, just to make the person feel better. When trying to avoid doing chores, some tend to lie about being too occupied with homework. Those are what I considered to be lies in the names of politeness and laziness; lies that cause no harm to others.
A false statement or a statement intended to deceive someone is known as a lie. Of course, there are many different types of lies. There are those blatant lies that have no truth in them whatsoever, lies of omission, and half-truths.
What are lies? A lie is defined as follows: To make a statement that one knows to be false, especially with the intent to deceive. There are several ways that lies are told for instance, there are white lies, lies of omission, bold faced lies, and lies of exaggeration. No matter what type of lie that one chooses to tell many people believe that lies do more harm than good.
...sed but we can find these answers as we ask ourselves why we deceive ourselves. Is it because we have a low self-esteem? We want to be deceptive? To get ahead? The answers to these question will help us understand why we self-deceive which will then help us realize why others do it as well.
In fact, we might not be able to blame anyone for lying and being deceitful because deception starts at an early age. “At age 2, only 30 percent lie, at age 3, half do. By 5 or 6, 90 percent of kids lie.” Then as we become adults, we lie less often and choose when to be deceitful when it best suits us. For adults, it was about one in every 5 conversations. Another big problem is that we have classifications when it comes to lies- we have real lies and white lies. The distinction on whether they are of equal value is up to each individual, Maurice Schweitzer, from The University of Pennsylvania, stated “there are lies that fall under societal norms and are not very harmful. There are other lies that are self-interested and are really harmful.” However, there are others like DePaolo, the author of “The Hows and Whys of Lies,” who see no distinction between lies and feel that no matter if the lie was motivated by good intentions or not, it is still