Throughout the millenniums, people have tried to figure out the causation for human behaviors. Michael Kimmel and Dave Barry have written pieces focusing on this subject, particularly about men. In the excerpt “‘Bros Before Hos’: The Guy Code” from Michael Kimmel’s book Guyland: The Perilous World Where Boys Become Men, he wrote that men’s actions are due to other men’s judgements. In the introduction “Guys vs. Men” from Dave Barry’s humor book Dave Barry’s Complete Guide to Guys, he wrote that guys’ strong internal drives and lack of deep thought cause their actions. Although both Kimmel and Barry have similar views on the actions of men, they have different approaches to the reasoning behind their actions: Kimmel states that fear of breaking
Kimmel supported his opinions mainly with quotes. He interviewed many guys and one woman from several colleges. He also took inspiration from other works. He quoted social psychologist Robert Brannon’s four rules of masculinity to explain how he came to create his own “Guy Code.” Barry, on the other hand, used his own life as evidence. He wrote anecdotes about his computer and about a dumb running challenge. He also used an analogy towards the end of his introduction. To explain how men deal with morals, he told a story about his dog digging through the
Due to the negative societal feelings towards effeminate men, guys who break the rules of masculinity are socially punished. Kimmel interviewed a first-year college student who said that breaking these masculine gender roles would cause him to “lose everything.” Kimmel continues with a list of answers varying from getting physically attacked to ostracized to self-harm. Therefore, Kimmel characterized “The Guy Code” as very negative and hurtful. Barry wrote more about the negative effects of acting like a guy, rather than the effects of the rules of being a guy like Kimmel did. In Barry’s anecdotes, he was left with an unnecessary and expensive computer and a hamstring injury. He also said that guys’ lack of “rigid and well-defined moral code” caused them to cheat on their partners, therefore causing a lot of emotional pain. Kimmel and Barry pointed out several effects on women as
This also leads into the fact that people interpret male violence and aggression as natural. They’ll pin it as something hardwired from ‘the hunter-gatherer days’. Often times they’ll also blame it on media violence, such as graphic video games, movies and TV shows. This is something much broader than that.
In Kimmel’s essay “’Bros Before Hos’: The Guy Code” he argues that the influence of society on masculinity is equal to or greater than biological influences on masculinity. In the essay, Kimmel uses various surveys and interviews to validate his argument. He points to peers, coaches, and family members as the people most likely to influence the development of a man’s masculinity. When a man has his manliness questioned, he immediately makes the decision never to say or do whatever caused him to be called a wimp, or unmanly. Kimmel’s argument is somewhat effective because the readers get firsthand accounts from the interviewees but the author does not provide any statistics to support his argument.
Guys vs Men is an essay written by Dave Barry on the difference of guys and men. In paragraph six, Dave Barry lists three characteristic to help support his belief about guys. The first characteristic is “Guys Like Neat Stuff” which expresses the captivation he has with his brand new computer. The next portrayal is titled “Guys Like a Really Pointless Challenge.” In this section, he describes a circumstance in which his resolve to beat another man in a forty-yard sprint resulted in being mocked for losing the bet he had made. The final representative states that “Guys Do Not Have a Rigid and Well-Defined Moral Code.” Barry talks about guys as not being bound by a rule book. Many guys know of the unrecorded code but refuse to accept by it. The
...cks’ discussed above do portray masculinity as a troubled, anxious cultural category as they hide behind a humorous façade through their unglamorous jobs, male bonding, homophobic comments and insults, and the pressure to change and become a ‘real man’ in order to live up to their successful female interests.
As young men grow up, they would generally learn and integrate within a box of codes which shows them how to be a man, known as the Guy Code. The Guy Code is a set of rules prevalently applied among men groups about how a man behaves with other men and his girlfriend. It mainly teaches guys to be dominant, aggressive and fearless. In Michael Kimmel’s “ Bros Before Hos: The Guy Code”, he indicates that men disguise their emotions and inner beings to be like a man, particularly among their peers. It imposes a consciousness that timidity is not a characteristic that men should have.
Men are allegedly competitive, aggressive, dominant, and strong and if these attributes are not acquired a man is not a man. When other men recognize a man failing in those four areas of “manliness” they compare him to a female with negative connotation as expressed in the following quote, “The worst insult one man can hurl at another-whether its boys on the playground or CEOs in the boardroom-is the accusation that a man is like a woman.” These actions create perceptions that women are unworthy and pitiful. Jensen mentions that because of masculinity men are thought to seek control over women resulting in an increase of physical violence towards women. However, masculinity has harsh effects on men as well. Men are constantly trying to prove their dominance to each other, while competing against one another for ultimate dominance. This creates a never ending cycle of competition and unease for
Boys think that they must put on a persona that they are tough and no one can hurt them. I agree with the author that the boys are forced to hide their emotions and fears that’s why men become insensitive. Because the most important factor of how boys become tough men is how adults treat and teach them differently from girls. The boys start hearing messages that they need to be strong and tough from adults since they are just babies. I think this is the main problem that causes men to be insensitive and emotionalist. However, it is their parents, society, and everyone around them who affect the boys to become the men that they should be. If people treat boys same as how they treat the girls, I guess men will act the same way as
For centuries, the ideal masculinity has been seen as the provider, the macho man, the cowboy and the emotional rock, but new representations of manliness in the media have been challenging this idea (Watson 2015, p. 270). Within these new depictions, there lies a hierarchy where one form of masculinity is more accepted than the rest (Kluch 2015). Macho masculinity has been seen as being dominant in the hierarchy for generations, however, in recent years, there have been an influx of new representations of masculinity that disrupt traditional hierarchal ideas. The masculinity of the twenty first century includes emotions, sensitivity, discipline, and intelligence. These new aspects of the hierarchy have been introduced by movies such as Brokeback Mountain, 22 Jump Street, The
The "others" do not want to demonize men, yet are not taking an active role in eliminating the occasional poison that masculine expectations inhibit. Hamblin 's opinion, as well as several respected experts in psychology, criminology, and sociology, believes that toxic masculinity is an accurate term that can further both discussion and action on how to stop the aggressive and destructive notions of
Myers mentioned in his article that this generation of young discouraged, angry men feels abandoned with the today’s norms. Male movie stars and athletes have further influenced the masculine norms. In males perspective, liking a feminine color, doing feminine actions, listening to specified girl music is considered to be less manly. These have greatly affected the likes and dislikes of many men. The entertainment industry has created a big gap between what is masculine or feminine. This has caused a big separation and it's getting worse. Male are taught to be man of the house, strong, and powerful, but sometimes they’re belittled by society that they can’t do certain things and all the power is
Boys are influenced by many of their coaches in life; brothers and fathers telling them they must be tough and show no pain, teachers who expect them to work hard at everything they do, and in the back of their minds are their mothers who worry about them over extending and getting hurt. Kimmel asked a few men in their 20’s, “where do young men get these ideas” (the Guy Code), they all gave the same answers: their brothers, fathers, and coaches. One mentioned that his father would always be riding him, telling him that he must be tough to make it in this world, another said his brothers were always ragging on him, calling him a “pussy” because he didn’t want to go outside and play football with them. He just wanted to stay in and play Xbox. Yet another said that whenever he got hurt his coach would mock and make fun of him because he was showing his feelings. The world is a very competitive for men, they believe they must always prove themselves to other men. Men get pressured into doing things they don’t want to do. Men shouldn’t be pressured they should be able to do what they want to
Let’s first start with “The Origins of Sex Differences in Human Behavior” (Eagly 1999). Eagly’s social structure origin theory proposes that men and women are psychologically different because their social roles generally differ. For example, historically, men have taken on the role of providing for their family with money and protection, playing the patron of the family. Women, however, have taken on the role of a nurture-giving guardian, playing a lesser part than their partner in making decisions regarding the family. For the most part, men are seen as the “man of the house” who puts dinner on the table and clothes on our backs while women...
Imagine that you are hurt, whether it is physically, emotionally, or even mentally but you cannot express these emotions. You cannot show one bit of the pain that you are experiencing. The only thing you can do is hide behind a huge dark mask that consumes you and who you really are just so you have the ability to conform to the rest of your peers and society. What makes it even worse is that it must be done for the majority of the days you live. The reality is this exists today in the world we live in. Men every day are forced to conform to the rules of the guy code in order to live without the criticism of society. In the article “’Bros Before Hos’: The Guy Code” by sociologist and spokesperson for the National Organization for Men Against
behaviors, and social conditions that we call masculinities are “hard-wired” into males through biology (see Thorhill & Palmer, 2000) and/or the heritability of human psyche (see Jung, 1959/1989; Bly, 1990). They view masculinity as static, transhistorical, cross-cultural, and cross-situational. From this perspective, gender change is either impossible, or it involves the use of powerful force to constrain what is seen as “naturally” male. (Masculine Self pg. 19)
We may be personally responsible for our own misconceptions of gender and masculinity. Our actions about these topics speak louder than words. Sociologist, Ann Oakley argues that parents often mold their children around certain behaviors, with positive and negative consequences, to adhere to the standards that are socially acceptable. Oddly there is a strong back lash to this sort of treatment in females. In a study done conducted by Michael Messner, when asked who was a tomboy and who was a sissy as children, women raised their hands more often to identify with the tomboy image. The tomboy trait celebrates masculinity and restricts femininity. Often children explore many traits about themselves, as Allen explained to Pascoe, “When you’re younger…you’re a kid. You are wide open…You just do what you want” (Pascoe 118). Darnell, a football player, stated “Since you were little boys you’ve been told, ‘hey don’t be a little faggot’” (p 55). Darnell showcasing that males are conditioned very early like females about their roles of masculinity. These children are taught about how masculinity works. In the school Pascoe researched, a faculty member, Mr. Ford, reminded males students through his reply to a backhanded comment made to him from another student that men should engage in sexual actives with women, not men. Another...