A Good Death: The Fear Of Death

Death is one of the concepts that is perceived differently throughout cultures. Some see it as a punishment or loss, some take it as just another chapter of our existence – a transition to the unknown. Death is so much more than just life running out of time; it includes a great deal of pain: physical, social – leaving our loved ones behind, mental – trying to understand what fills that void when we die, emotional – frustration and regret, and spiritual – fear of not having led a fulfilling life. There is a fear of death, or the unknown that awaits afterwards not only in relation to ourselves, but also in relation to people we love, and despite the pain that fills our hearts, sometimes we need to do the right thing to ease their journey.

It seems that we would do everything we could to keep them fighting, and not letting them give up. But sometimes allowing them to have a “good death” is the right thing to do. A “good death” does not involve an intensive medical care in hospitals; rather, the patient’s care is in hands of his or her family that ensures “maximum consciousness and minimum pain” (Bjorklund B. R., 2011, p. 341). When it comes to arranging a hospice care for a dying patient in Ukraine, it is much easier than it is in the United States. Perhaps, my parents being doctors played an important role in fulfilling my grandfathers’ dying wishes to spend the rest of their days at home with their families. My parents did the best they could to ease the pain my grandfathers were going through. Although one of my grandfathers had a lung cancer, he refused to be tortured by the harsh treatments, like chemo, that would make him suffer the rest of his days, rather than let him enjoy what life had left for him. The thought of not trying all the methods to cure the cancer left my mother blaming herself for not trying enough. But she understood that it was the best thing she could do for him not to suffer more than he already did. Seeing a person we love suffer may lead us to decisions that are controversial with our feelings, but appear to be the right thing to