The Relationship Between Kiki Belsey And Carlene Kipps

The relationship between Kiki Belsey and Carlene Kipps begins with the relationship of their children, a union vehemently opposed by both families, and more specifically both fathers. The two families are incompatible in almost every conceivable way. The Kipps are wealthy, conservative, and aesthetically beautiful, while the Belseys are middle-class, liberal, and plain. Despite these differences, and in direct defiance of their husbands and children, in the time of greatest need in both their lives, these two women each become exactly what the other needs, a friend.

Throughout the novel Kiki’s appearance, her size, her beauty, is discussed from her own perspective, the perspective of strangers, and even from the perspective of her husband’s

lover. Kiki herself feels that her body and her race determine who she must be in public; that a black woman with large breasts must be a living, breathing mass of contradictions - predatory and motherly, threatening and comforting. It is by ignoring what Kiki should be, and saying what she is, “not little”, that first endears Kiki to Carlene. The honesty with which Carlene addresses Kiki sparks a similar candor within Kiki, who agrees that “ain’t nothing small on [her]”. This short exchange begins a friendship between two women that has none of the expectations of her other relationships. These relationships - her other friendships, and even her marriage - have forced her to present a caricature of herself, the fat, black, wife of the academic. The first time Kiki runs into a friend in the novel, Kiki plays this part “moving her head side to side in a manner she understood white people enjoyed” (52). With Carlene Kiki doesn’t feel she needs to be more academic, more white, more black, she can instead be exactly the person she has always been, married or not, fat or thin. Even when Kiki finds herself internally or externally disagreeing with Carlene, about men and about their husbands, she still finds herself drawn back to her. “Something in Kiki’s heart shifted too, towards this woman. She didn’t seem to say anything she didn’t mean.”
The next time the two women meet, Kiki is paying a visit to Carlene to apologize for not answering her note sooner.

In the undoing of her mistake, it becomes clear just how much Carlene’s friendship means to Kiki, “she felt ridiculous, like a schoolgirl.” This painting of Kiki’s interaction with Carlene closely mirrors that of younger, more romantic relationships, such as Zora’s second interaction with Carl where she wonders “was she ridiculous to him?” (140). In this second meeting with Carlene Kiki not only states explicitly that their friendship matters to her, but makes an effort to be truly herself. As their conversation continues the differences between the two women; cultural, political, and economic become apparent and Kiki begins to wonder “how soon she could make her excuses without seeming rude” (170). However, almost immediately, Kiki rediscovers what has drew her to Carlene originally, “she put things well: insightfully, honestly”

(171).
When the conversation takes a more personal turn, Kiki again reciprocates the candor of her friend and the two women discuss their own lives, their own choices. They begin with their hopes for their lives, one woman hopes only to “love and be loved” while the other has nothing but plans - to be a doctor, a writer. This is where a conversation between their husbands would stop, with words like “feminist” creating an insurmountable barrier to their friendship. However, their wives, the “ideal stay-at-home christian mom” and Malcolm X’s private assistant” are able to find common ground and mutual respect in their differences. As the conversation continues Carlene returns once again to Kiki’s beauty, asking if she was “very good-looking” as a young woman. At their first meeting, this line of straightforward questioning was strange and endearing to Kiki, and although Kiki finds it no less strange now, she embraces it and answers that she was, in fact, “hot”. Both Carlene’s question, and Kiki’s answer are external, Kiki used to be “good-looking” and for six years she was even “hot”. However, Carlene’s response to this statement, “you still have quite a bit of beauty” says something deeper.
When they begin to discuss Carlene’s favorite painting, Kiki quickly begins to fall into the part of a Citizen of Wellington: aiming to impress as an intellectual, working to see art in a way Professor Belsey will deem worthy. Carlene, however, is not interested in the how “binary” the world’s population is, but instead the way the painting makes her feel. It soon becomes clear that Carlene understands art in an entirely different way than Howard, she particularly loves portraits and calls them the “greater part of [her] joy” (175). Carlene doesn’t approach art as if it is trying to trick her, but instead evaluates it as she does people, on it’s “beauty”. Kiki feels more comfortable here, looking at a painting and being able to find beauty in the woman and enjoy her parrots. Eventually the two women begin to discuss Kiki’s marriage, and Howard’s affair. Here again the woman find themselves on opposing ground: while Kiki explains she is trying to decide “what her life will be for” Carlene states that what to live for is a man’s question, and that she has always asked whom to live for. Kiki is taken aback by this, saying “I'm afraid I just don't believe that. I know I didn’t live for anybody” (176). Once again however, the woman chose their commonalities, angling away from the political value of what women should and should not do for their husbands and turning back to their own personal experiences.
The next time the two women find time to meet they agree to go Christmas shopping. As the friends move from store to store the differences in the two families become even more starkly apparent: the Kipps are deeply religious, while Howard places an embargo on Christmas in the Beasley household. Again, however, they find that their differences aren’t as important as the honestly with which they discuss them. The friends talk about presents for their families, art, and their plans for the season, and eventually, Carlene spontaneously asks Kiki to come with her to the Kipps family vacation home in Amhurst. Kiki shrinks away from such an impromptu trip and declines Carlene’s offer. However, as the day goes on she becomes upset over her decision, “it was exactly the kind of offer Howard and the kids would have thought absurd, sentimental and impractical - it was an offer she should have taken up.” Eventually Kiki decides to do something about this desire, and catches Carlene at the train station just in time to join her on the trip. Unfortunately, just as the two are set to depart, the Kipps family appears on the train platform, returning from their trip early to whisk Carlene away.
This is the last time Carlene and Kiki are able to see each other. Just a few weeks later on Christmas vacation, Kiki receives a call from Michael Kipps informing her of his mother’s death, and the cancer she kept from her family and friends. The death of Carlene reveals the depth of her friendship with Kiki, which surprises both the Belsey and Kipps families. Even as Kiki collapses in his arms after the news of Carlene’s death, Howard assumes they will not be attending the funeral. The Kipps family only begins to understand the relationship when they find a note from Carlene leaving her favorite painting to her friend, Kiki Belsey. More important to the Kipps family than the emotional ramifications of this decision are the financial ones, as the painting seems to be worth quite a bit of money. The family takes some time convincing themselves their mother never would have left the painting to Kiki if she was of sound mind, or not being manipulated, or if her mind hadn’t been “bedeviled” (278), and eventually burn the note containing their mother’s last wish.
The reaction to Carlene’s death by both the Belsey and Kipps families illustrates the necessity of each woman to the other.

Although in different ways, the two women have lost what was most crucial to them. All Carlene Kipps ever wanted was to “love and be loved” however, as she was dying of cancer, clearly weak, lethargic and sick, her family never noticed. Kiki “married her best friend”, and moved to the city of his choosing. There she was pushed into the mold she didn’t know how to fill, and just as she felt she lost the ability to be who she truly was in public, she lost the ability to communicate with her husband in private. Through their genuine empathy and honestly, Carlene and Kiki were able to transcend the differences that separated the rest of their families to become exactly what the other needed. Carlene needed someone to love her, someone to listen, someone to care. Kiki needed someone to be honest with her, and to allow her to be honest in

return.
In all of their conversations, the main point of disagreement between Carlene in Kiki is whether to live for the man you love. They come back to it again and again, Carlene only wishing to live for her husband while Kiki states that to live for a man is “taking us all, all women, certainly all black women, three hundred years backwards.” However, even as those words leave her mouth she sits in a town made up of white academics. People she felt could never understand her. Howard’s city, Howard’s peers. Regardless of their philosophies, Carlene and Kiki have lived for their husbands, both “staked their lives”, and both have been failed. However, at the exact time in their lives they had been most disappointed, they were able to find what they needed in each other: acceptance, honesty, and beauty.