Our parents are not perfect. They brought us in this world to mold and shape us to the best of their abilities. The fact that remains is no matter whom our parents are, each one of them faces difficult obstacles when it comes to raising their children. “I Stand Here Ironing” by Tillie Olsen portrays an excellent example of a mother who shares with us the emotional burden of the circumstances she was forced to contend with in order to raise her oldest daughter, Emily. We are sympathetic to the woes of the mother’s situation, the struggle to obtain a better way of life for her and her daughter. We empathize with Emily, and her endeavors to maintain a stable relationship with her mother. It seems these two characters’ lives were set up for failure from the beginning. As the story unfolds, through abandonment, illness, and long-absences, the mother shows regret for the path she chose despite there being no other option. The story commences with the request of an unknown speaker, “I wish you would manage the time to come in and talk with me about your daughter. I’m sure you can help me understand her. She’s a youngster who needs help and whom I’m deeply interested in helping.” (2) The mother seems to be caught off guard, “Even if I came, what good would it do? You think because I am her mother I have a key, or that in some way you could use me as a key? She has lived for nineteen years. There is all that life that has happened outside of me, beyond me.” (3) She becomes perplexed as to how she could possibly find the time to sum up what could help this person understand her daughter. From this acknowledgement, we can interpret this to mean that the mother does not even understand her own daughter. At the age of ninet... ... middle of paper ... ...ted her in the raising of the rest of her children. As she begins to put a wrap on her thoughts, she comes to a conclusion, that Emily is “a child of her age, of depression, of war, of fear.” With her proclamation, we can deduce that the mother has settled she is not the cause for blame. Emily was born into unfortunate circumstances where the possibility for an exemplary childhood was non-existent. Emily’s behavior and identity, or who she essentially is, is a person who became molded around these doomed events that consume her past. The mother leaves us with a satisfying ending to her heartbreaking story about missed opportunities by tacitly answering the unknown speaker’s initial question about how to understand and help her daughter. “Let her be… Only help her to know---that she is more than this dress on the ironing board, helpless before the iron.” (57)
Life is sad and tragic; some of which is made for us and some of which we make ourselves. Emily had a hard life. Everything that she loved left her. Her father probably impressed upon her that every man she met was no good for her. The townspeople even state “when her father died, it got about that the house was all that was left to her; and in a way, people were glad…being left alone…She had become humanized” (219). This sounds as if her father’s death was sort of liberation for Emily. In a way it was, she could begin to date and court men of her choice and liking. Her father couldn’t chase them off any more. But then again, did she have the know-how to do this, after all those years of her father’s past actions? It also sounds as if the townspeople thought Emily was above the law because of her high-class stature. Now since the passing of her father she may be like them, a middle class working person. Unfortunately, for Emily she became home bound.
No matter what actions or words a mother chooses, to a child his or her mother is on the highest pedestal. A mother is very important to a child because of the nourishing and love the child receives from his or her mother but not every child experiences the mother’s love or even having a mother. Bragg’s mother was something out of the ordinary because of all that she did for her children growing up, but no one is perfect in this world. Bragg’s mother’s flaw was always taking back her drunken husband and thinking that he could have changed since the last time he...
Tillie Olsen's I Stand Here Ironing, and Alice Walker's Everyday Use, both address the issue of a mother's guilt over how her children turn out. Both mothers blamed themselves for their daughter's problems. While I Stand Here Ironing is obviously about the mousy daughter, in Everyday Use this is camouflaged by the fact most of the action and dialog involves the mother and older sister Dee. Neither does the mother in Everyday Use say outright that she feels guilty, but we catch a glimpse of it when Dee is trying very hard to claim the handmade quilts. The mother says she did something she had never done before, "hugged Maggie to me," then took the quilts from Dee and gave them to Maggie. In I Stand Here Ironing the mother tells us she feels guilty for the way her daughter Emily is, for the things she (the mother) did and did not do. The mother's neighbor even tells her she should "smile at Emily more when you look at her." Again towards the end of the story Emily's mother admits "my wisdom came too late." The mothers unknowingly gave Emily and Maggie second best.
The Mother Daughter Relationship in "I Stand Here Ironing" by Tillie Olsen. I stand here ironing, a unique phrase uttered by a woman in her conquest of life. It may seem like an unwanted phrase to many, but it has a deep meaning behind it. This phrase is almost whispered by the narrator of?I Stand Here Ironing,?
The stories “I Stand Here Ironing” by Tillie Olsen and “Everyday Use” by Alice Walker, are different in many ways, but are also similar. “I Stand Here Ironing” and “Everyday Use” both focus on the relationships of the mother and daughter, and on the sibling’s relationships with each other. Emily from “I Stand Here Ironing” and Maggie from “Everyday Use” have different relationships with their mothers, but have similar relationships with their sisters. Although the stories are similar in that Emily and Maggie are both distant from their sisters, they differ in that the mother is distant from Emily in “I Stand Here Ironing,” while the mother is close to Maggie in “Everyday Use.”
Because the mother is living in a world of depression a dark wall has wrapped itself around her. Worrying solemnly about the life of her daughter, the mother is neglecting to appreciate the positive attributes her daughter is presenting. Emily is a gifted comedian, "Where does it come from, that comedy?" (p.159) being a comedian during the Great Depression is almost as rare as finding water during an extensive drought. If the mother wasn't as depressed she would be able to appreciate the comedy that Emily is passionate for. The mother's character is left in a state of helplessness reaching out beyond depression to view the comedian inside her daughter.
Jeannette's mother let her children roam free and protect themselves against the dangers of the world. “fussing over children who cry only encourages them, ….. its positive reinforcement for bad behavior” pg.17. This caused Jeannette at age 3, to fall into fire and go to the hospital for months. Jeannette's mother didn’t want to have to deal with her children and told them to figure things out for themselves. This selfish act done by her mother forced her children to grow up faster. Therefore Jeannette resented her parents and wanted to make a better life for not only herself but her future children. This pushed her to succeed in life, yet without her negative relationships with her parents she might have not been able to do great things in her
The narrator reflects and regrets on her daughter Emily’s past. The narrator feels guilty about leaving Emily at a neighbor’s house, sending her to nursery school and a convalescent facility. In her short story “I Stand Here Ironing”, Olsen describes the convalescent home as she insert “The parents stand below shrieking up to be heard and the children shriek down to be heard, and between them the invisible wall “Not To Be Contaminated by Parental Germs or Physical Affection” (226). When Emily is in the convalescent facility, she is cut off from outside world, including the communication with her mother. Besides the convalescent facility, the iron itself also has a symbolic meaning. In the beginning of the short story, Olsen writes “I stand here ironing, and what you asked me moves tormented back and forth with the iron” (223). The narrator is ironing during a phone conversation with an adult concerned about Emily 's well-being. Toward the end, the author express the Emily’s feeling when she says “Aren’t you ever going to finish the ironing, Mother” (229). The non-stop ironing annoys Emily because her own mother is willing to spend the time on ironing despite it would extend the distance between the two of them. The simple act of ironing not only symbolizes the duty as a mother but also represent the helplessness to change the circumstances. The absences of the narrator and the lack of communication weakens the bond
The author uses different points of view to create tension in the story. The mom acts in a way that neglects the daughters interests. This makes them both feel less connected and leaves the daughter feeling hopeless. In paragraph 9, “‘It’s strange actually. I wasn’t expecting it, but then at the last minute the funding came through.’ She folded her arms across her waist. ‘I’m going to Costa Rica to finish my research.” This made the narrator/daughter angry and flustered with her mom’s actions. She has trouble remaining connected with her parent because they both want different things which leaves on character feeling betrayed. “Opportunity? For me? Or for you?” (34). Both of their actions and responses create tension in this story. Their communication lacks and this results in pressure on both
Although, a mother’s determination in the short story “I Stand Here Ironing” mother face with an intense internal conflict involving her oldest daughter Emily. As a single mother struggle, narrator need to work long hours every day in order to support her family. Despite these criticisms, narrator leaves Emily frequently in daycare close to her neighbor, where Emily missing the lack of a family support and loves. According to the neighbor states, “You should smile at Emily more when you look at her” (Olsen 225). On the other hand, neighbor gives the reader a sense that the narrator didn’t show much affection toward Emily as a child. The narrator even comments, “I loved her. There were all the acts of love” (Olsen 225). At the same time, narrator expresses her feeling that she love her daughter. Until, she was not be able to give Emily as much care as she desire and that gives her a sense of guilt, because she ends up remarrying again. Meanwhile narrator having another child named Susan, and life gets more compli...
was no mother figure spoke of, just her father, which she lived with alone other then
The mother is a selfish and stubborn woman. Raised a certain way and never falters from it. She neglects help, oppresses education and persuades people to be what she wants or she will cut them out of her life completely. Her own morals out-weight every other family member’s wants and choices. Her influence and discipline brought every member of the family’s future to serious-danger to care to her wants. She is everything a good mother isn’t and is blind with her own morals. Her stubbornness towards change and education caused the families state of desperation. The realization shown through the story is the family would be better off without a mother to anchor them down.
As time went on pieces from Emily started to drift away and also the home that she confined herself to. The town grew a great deal of sympathy towards Emily, although she never hears it. She was slightly aware of the faint whispers that began when her presence was near. Gossip and whispers may have been the cause of her hideous behavior. The town couldn’t wait to pity Ms. Emily because of the way she looked down on people because she was born with a silver spoon in her mouth and she never thought she would be alone the way her father left her.
In the short story "I Stand Here Ironing" by Tillie Olsen the conflict between a mother whose giving is limited by hardships is directly related to her daughter's wrinkled adjustment. Ironing, she reflects upon when she was raising her first-born daughter, Emily. The mother contemplates the consequences of her actions. The mother's life had been interrupted by childbirth, desertion, poverty, numerous jobs, childcare, remarriage, frequent relocations, and five children. Her struggling economic situation gave way to little or no opportunity to properly care for and nurture her first-born child. In spite of the attention and love Emily craved and never received, she still survived, and even made strengths, and talents, out of the deprivations she had endured.
Emily was kept confined from all that surrounded her. Her father had given the town folks a large amount of money which caused Emily and her father to feel superior to others. “Grierson’s held themselves a little too high for what they really were” (Faulkner). Emily’s attitude had developed as a stuck-up and stubborn girl and her father was to blame for this attitude. Emily was a normal girl with aspirations of growing up and finding a mate that she could soon marry and start a family, but this was all impossible because of her father. The father believed that, “none of the younger man were quite good enough for Miss Emily,” because of this Miss Emily was alone. Emily was in her father’s shadow for a very long time. She lived her li...