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Th effect of divorce on children
Th effect of divorce on children
The negative impact of divorce on children
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While taking this class I found the Ted Talk “The impact of divorce on children” by Tamara D. Afifi very helpful when applying it to my life and kind of stuck with me. I believe that Dr. Afifis ted talk aligned with perspectives on the negative effects of divorce on children a lot. For example, when She mentioned how constant parental conflicts hurt the child. Divorce should be looked at as a way of solving a problem, even though many adults see it as a way of running away from conflict. Many relationships are far beyond repair but some parents believe that it is or can better for the children to fight for it rather than getting a divorce and putting an end to their ongoing disagreements. In the video, she expresses that the conflict affects
Divorce has grown conventional in today's society. First marriages stand a 50% chance of breaking up and second marriages stand a 67% chance of doing the same thing (issue 8 pg 146). It seems as if instead of working out problems and believing in love, people are giving up and throwing away all they worked on together for so long, thinking that their next marriage will be much different. By doing this they are hurting not only themselves but also their children and could cause them to have negative side effects later on into their adult lives according to clinical psychologist Judith S. Wallerstein. Erikson's theory of personality development can help calculate which and how stages are affected when parents get divorce. Stages 3, 4, 5 and 6 seem to be the most affected by the divorce because the main conflicts the child is confronting at the time are necessary to go through them calmly for a healthy development.
Divorce is something that has been discussed and studied many times, as it is becoming more common in the United States. The children are the main ones being effected by the split relationship, however the amount of impact of the effects are based on many variables. I became interested in this subject because my best friends parents recently filed for divorce and I wanted to understand in what ways was this going to affect him in his life now and in the future.
The argument over how divorce affects children is one that has been going on for a very long time. Some people believe when parents get a divorce the children are not affected at all, while others believe when parents get a divorce the children are affected by the impact of divorce more than anyone in the family. In some cases, married couples can be in such a terrible marriage that divorce can in no way be avoided, and these divorces are usually the ones that children benefit from and are affected in a positive way. Many times though, a couple will choose to get a divorce because their marriage is not exactly the way it used to be, and they want that aspect of life back; these are the divorces that negatively affect children. Even though in some cases divorce does not affect children negatively, many times when parents obtain a divorce, the children are negatively harmed in many different ways that will forever change their lives.
When divorced, the children go through many emotional changes. "Children of divorce are more depressed and aggressive toward parents and teachers than are youngsters from intact families. They are much more likely to develop mental and emotional disorders later on in life" (Leo 2000). Children and teenagers have a hard tim...
Divorce has become a major part of our society and affects many people every year. In some instances of divorce, families have been torn apart leaving children stuck in the middle of conflict. This is where children start lashing out at their parents and everyone around them and it is because they are hurt and out of their comfort zone. One cannot forget about the children that divorce affects in a negative way. However, this is not always the case. There are children of divorce that get through it relatively calmly. However, one must keep in mind that divorce is not always the answer. If there is a marriage that has only minor and easily remedied issues then they should try to reach a compromise. Married couples facing irreconcilable marital problems should not stay together for the sake of the children because they need to take their own welfare into consideration, divorcing may let them function better as a family, and staying together could put the children more at risk for psychological problems.
Children of divorced parents may have a lower sense of psychological well-being than children who grew up with intact families the range of feelings that a child may encounter include: disbelief and denial, sadness, loss, loneliness, depression, anger, anxiety, fear, relief, and hope. Some children may experience long-lasting emotional effects into their adulthood that damage their ability to preserve relationships. The result of parental divorce shapes children emotionally and may impact self-esteem, future relationships, dating and marriage (Armando Loomis and Booth 895+)..
Divorce should be harder to obtain due to the effect that it has on children the main effect it has on the children is depression. “ In the short term divorce is always troublesome for children Mavis Hetherington videotaped and scrutinized the workings of 1400 divorced families since the early 1970’s. Hetherington pinpoints a crisis period of about two years in the immediate aftermath of separation when the adults, preoccupied with their own lives, typically takes their eye off parenting just when their children are reeling from loss and feeling bewildered” (Hethrington 2). This article states that the short term effect of divorce affects the kid deep because they feel that they lost one forever and in those 1400 many of the kids felt the effect of the divorce. “Wallerstein has told us that divorce abruptly ends kids’ childhood, filling it with loneliness and worry about their parents, and hurting them prematurely and recklessly into adolescence. (Wallerstein 2).” This later affects the kids life because they try to think of happy memories they had but really all they can think about is the parent that they loss due to the divorce. “Contrary to the popular perceptions, the alternative to most divorces is not life in a war zone. Though more than 50 percent of all marriages currently end in divorce, experts tell us that only about 15 percent of all unions involve high levels of conflict. In the vast number of divorces, then, there is no gross strife or violence that could warp a youngster’s childhood. The majority of marital break-ups are driven by a quest for greener grass—and in these cases the children will almost always be worse off. (Zinsmeister 2)” this proves to me that when people get a divorce they most of the time don’t ...
Most people, when thinking about divorce, worry about the impact that it has on the children that are involved. Even though children are most likely better off if totally incompatible parents separate instead of staying together, divorce is about loss and change, and it is still hard for children. Everyone knows that divorce has its effects on children. There are three different sources that try to explain these effects. Graham Blaine Jr. states that divorce is a threat to all children, whereas Rhona Mahony states that divorce is not always the cause of behavioral or academic problems in children coming from divorced families. Yvette Walczak and Sheila Burns state that the extent of the damage can be determined by the parents and their methods of explanation to the children.
When a couple with a child chooses to get a divorce this can have major impact on a child at any age. There are many causes of stress throughout the divorce process that can negatively affect children. First, negative reactions and behaviors are dependent upon the situation before the divorce. Some studies show that how much parents fight, how it is done, how it is resolved, and what precautions are taken to protect the children from it's effects are the most important predictors of child adjustment (Kelly, 2000). Meaning that if children are exposed to fights about custody, money, or the failing marriage they could feel the repercussions of their parents conflict. Next, divorce can cause children to have heightened fear...
Children will be suffered conflict with the interaction with their parents and siblings, and other aspects in their family life by cause of the divorce (Berk, 2010). Some parents who decide to get divorced that they were waiting the time on arguments and fights. Also, these parents use their children to punishment to one to each other. For this situation, children have a lot of conflicts on their emotions, and they have issues in their security. For instance, the custody’s fights are the biggest battle during the separation, and parents develop a lot of stress during this process. In the majority of the cases, mothers have the custody of their children, and they have to raise as a single mother. Also, the children tend to develop a lot of fears and about what they want to do. The divorce brings several negatives on children, and children live with a lot of stress during the divorce process. As well as, each child is different, and they
The 21st century has changed drastically since the 1900s. One of the many things that has changed is how big of an impact children have on marriages.Children can either bring a couple together, and realize how great life is. Or a child can show the significant other how they are complete opposites. In the past century, children have had a bigger impact of making or breaking a marriage.
Divorce isn’t always as bad as people portray it. Commonly realized, divorce isn’t a great thing to happen to a family. But being in a bad relationship can have more negative effects on a child than divorce. In a study conducted of 98 couples, that later divorced, 80% of their children felt that their parents split was a good decision. Of the 20% that felt it wasn’t a good decision, most came from more abusive families. Being together in a bad relationship can actually cause more harm than good. Parents commonly think that by staying together for the kid’s sake will it eliminate negative effects and help their kids thrive. Nevertheless they see their parents unhappiness creating a more tense environment. Provided that the parents are abusive or are more vocal about their opinions then it can actually create a traumatic environment around the child, making them feel unsafe or timid constantly. What the minority of people know is that divorce can actually give kids positive vibes. Divorce can teach kids to focus on the positives and keep moving forward in life. In a Harper Collins book it says (We’re still family: What grown Children have to say about their parents divorce) that “ kids more commonly emerge wiser in spite of- or perhaps because of- their complex histories.” Multiple studies have proven, kids who have experienced divorce emerge mo...
In a divorce, the parents usually do not get along and may have different opinions on items. They may go to court and fight against each other about what factors caused the separation leading to the divorce and how the properties are divided. This possible exposure is very unhealthy for a child. The child sees his parents fighting and may learn from the behavior and display it. He or she may see that behavior as being an acceptable action. The fighting behavior of parents causes behavioral problems within a child. The child may hear things from one parent about the other that causes the child to take sides when he or she should be learning not to be biased and to love both parents equally.
The Negative Effect of Divorce on Children Divorce has a negative effect on the psychological and social aspects of our children, which may appear instantly or not come to the surface for years. This is why I think that divorce should only be a last resort and not rushed into, even by couples with the most troubled marriages. The only acceptable reason for someone rushing into divorce is if they or their children are in danger. I believe that marriage is a commitment not to be taken lightly and disregarded at the first bump in the road, especially when there are children involved. Far too many people do not want to take responsibility for their actions and choices; for example, people use abortion as birth control and couples’ jumping in and out of marriages like it’s a trial and error institution.
In the world we live in today, divorce has unfortunately become a normal thing in our lives. Many married couples are getting divorced for many reasons; problems in the marriage, either a spouse having an affair, a loss of feelings, and many other types of complications. Many divorces involve children who are young and due to their age do not understand what is really going on. We all know someone who has dealt with divorce. Children are the ones who are typically affected the most by the divorce and they will have to learn to cope with their parent’s divorce at such a young age, affecting them in positive or negative ways.