Love is just a man-made construct created to justify our decadence. Human are hedonistic animals: we always seek pleasure. Truthfully, we are inherently selfish, caring for only our own well-being, and even if we say we love without costs, we love because it gives us the utmost pleasure: the pursuit of happiness.
Look at the magical world of Disney, all the princesses ‘fell in love’ to escape their dreadful lives, either being an oppressed slave to her step-family, having an obsessive mother who wants to kill you, or having a miserable curse. In Modern Love, T.C.Boyle described a love between the narrator and an obsessive, germaphobe girl. Why did this love exist? Simply, because of the fear of being alone. The narrator is described as “a
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thirty-three-year-old bachelor” that was OCD and “carried some scars” (Boyle). What are these scars? Maybe, the “scars” were the pain of being constantly reminded of his imperfections, his “anal retentiveness” (Boyle). He searched for a love of “comfort and security” (Kipnis 35), so this love between the narrator and Brenda was basically a settling love, to escape the judgemental world and find someone to accept their imperfections. This settling love can be compared to the ideas pointed out in Laura Kipnis’ Love’s Labors. Kipnis stated that a good relationship “takes work” (Kipnis 18), like how the narrator accepted Breda’s germaphobic tendencies (to the point where he even wore a full-body condom) with his justifications that he had “to work at love, “to bend, make subtle adjustments, sacrifices” because “love is nothing without sacrifice” (Boyle.) To gain something, we have to sacrifice something which Breda didn’t do and ultimately the relationship failed. Love has so many sides, colours, and prices. Talking about prices and sacrifices, take my sister for example, why is she in a relationship? As insulting and rude for a younger sister to say, I always see her as a self-centered, attention-sucking vampire. From a young age, she was pampered and adored by my family, especially by my grandma who tailored and cut meals to bite-sized pieces according to my sister’s liking and spoon-fed her to an age that shouldn’t even be socially correct. This type of love would be ultimate love, and it is not as amazing as the name infers. Ultimate meaning she is the queen while the other is her submissive servant. It always questioned me how can you love a person who makes you do all the work? Her boyfriend has to carry all her bags (at least six due to her shopping addiction), open all doors for her, clean her stuffy room, and constantly pamper her like a baby. He can be seen as her personal butler. This brings me to Kipnis’ statement that the “desires have their roots in some childhood deprivation or trauma” which leads to a search for an escape, love, from the “lack of self-esteem or some other impeded development” (Kipnis 33). Why does he sacrifices his freedom for this ultimate love? It’s ‘because of love’ is actually a fear of being heartbroken and never finding love again as well as the pursuit of happiness. Why does my sister constantly feed on attention? I’m assuming it’s because of her lost of the ‘only child’ throne and constant comparisons to her younger sister. Love can be seen as a construct to escape the pain experiences of the past or to come.
An escape pod. Why is Breda so obsessed with being clean? Using the child-latent-sexual desire research from psychoanalyst, Sigmund Freud, Kipnis stated that desires for love or “searching for” love comes from “a deeply buried trove of childhood memories or injuries” (Kipnis 33.) Maybe, she experienced a traumatic incident as a child or in the past--like having a close person around her die because of an infestation of pathogenic germs. This event stayed with her and manifested to her love life. With social pressure “beaming into our psyches” (Kipnis 34) cultivating us to interweave happiness with couple’s love, Breda attempted to enter into the so-called realm of salvation and “happiness” depicted by society’s “lovestruck couples” like when she said “I love you” combined with “I think” (Boyle.) However, her pursuit of happiness was not love (like how society forced us to believe) but the isolation of germs. Thus, she didn’t settle with the narrator’s “athlete’s foot,” “psoriasis,” and “eczema” (Boyle), and prioritize her dream of a germ-free life. Her love was priority love unlike the narrator's setting love. Thus, their relationship failed. In a way, love is just falling into our desires be it: comfort, attention, or
purity. As contradicting this sounds, I still question what is love? I pinned a definition on it, but I still wonder the endless meanings of love. There are infinite numbers of people that have existed and existed, so there should be different ideas about love withheld in such numbers. Bringing in a biological perspective, is love just another concept for mating to makes us seem superior to ‘second-class’ animals? Humans are animals, but what differentiates us from the generic chimp is our interpersonal skills (and thumbs). The ability to think abstract ideas and communicate them changed us. Knowledge changed us. To such knowledge bears a responsibility: the loss of simplicity. Tying emotional aspects and opinions to procreation just complicate things and controls us. Society puts so much emphasis on love and marriage, to the point where it is a "social norms " and "mainstream conventions" to have love intertwined with being married and happy (Kipnis 15). We created the idea of love, and now love controls us. In This Is Emo, Chuck Klosterman spoke about how the media “twisted” everyone’s perceptions to a single type of love, “fake love” (Klosterman). The love that blows people’s breaths away, the love at first sight, the love that gives up life, and especially the love that leads to a happily, married life are the embodiments of fake love. This artificial, fairy-tale love misdirects people from seeing the truth: love is just a concept. Klosterman stated that people who realize this construct of love “share a single unifying characteristic: the inability to experience the kind of mind-blowing, transcendent romantic relationship.” These people realize that this “fake love” that people search for is just a dream, and if it “exists,” it just naive people loving for the idea of love. In a way, Kipnis is right that monogamy doesn’t exist because love doesn’t exist. LOVE is a manmade CONSTRUCT. Honestly, society is just overcomplicating things. It shouldn’t matter who you choose to be with or what you do. There shouldn’t be any expectations. No one is perfect. I personally think that the imperfections makes the world beautiful. How can there be light without the dark? Imperfect beings working hard to make-up for their imperfection (like how a small plant grew from a heap of decomposed trash) is what makes me love life. My image of a perfect world is when people accept each other and their imperfections. Until then, we will continue to immerse ourselves with this notion of love to fulfil our blinded, hedonistic selves.
This conception of love can be traced back to the first chapters of the Bible, Genesis. Adam and Eve, in the garden of Eden, eat the forbidden fruit and are forever outcast from paradise, forced to suffer. The puritans argued that, if God wishes us to suffer, who are we to go against his wishes. We are sinners, because of the Original Sin, and it was Eve who gav...
“Happiness is feeling connected, free, and capable” (Myers, 2013). That is just one way that love can be explained. Love makes people feel a connection to those around them, and gives them a sense of belonging. Although many people think of love in terms of romantic relationships, and marriage, love plays a much greater role in everyday life than simply finding a companion to spend the rest of your life with. Love is also an important aspect in the relationships that we build with friends, family, and even our pets.
The modern concept of love owes a great deal to the Humanist tradition of the Renaissance. The humanists focused on perfection and exaltation of this life as opposed to the afterlife. In Tristan and Iseult the seeds of Renaissance love are present in the Middle Ages. To the modern eye, it is a mystery how the period of the Middle Ages produced the seeds of the diametrically opposite Renaissance. Yet it is necessary to understand this transformation if one is to fully comprehend the forces that helped produce the modern consciousness. Courtly Love is a transitional concept that emerged in the Middle Ages. It is transitional because it emerged early and acknowledges God as the creator of love, yet it concentrates on the lovers themselves. The tale of Tristan and Iseult is one of the oldest tales that exhibits courtly love. The Love of Tristan and Iseult, as a metaphor for courtly love, is pivotal to the transition from the Middle Ages' focus on community and afterlife to the Renaissance focus on the individual and earthly happiness.
Poets and philosophers for centuries have been trying to answer the question, what is love? Love has an infinite number of definitions, which vary from one person to another. Love cannot be measured by any physical means. One may never know what true love is until love it- self has been experienced. What is love? A four letter word that causes a person to behave in a way that is out of character. What is love? A first kiss, childhood crushes on a teacher or friend’s mom. What is love? A choice that people make by putting their partner’s wishes, desires and needs above everything else. What is love? The act of forgiveness, the infatuation with someone, the communication between two people. What is love? A friendship that turned into a lifelong commitment, that special someone who has vowed to spend the rest of their lives to honor and protect, to love each other “till death do you part.” When in love nothing else in the world matters. According to the online Encarta Dictionary love is the passionate feeling of romantic and sexual desire and longing for somebody. Poets and philosophers may never know what love really is, and we may never truly understand the question what is love.
Love is said to be one of the most desired things in life. People long for it, search for it, and crave it. It can come in the form of partners, friends, or just simply family. To some, love is something of a necessity in life, where some would rather turn a cold shoulder to it. Love can be the mixture of passion, need, lust, loyalty, and blood. Love can be extraordinary and breathtaking. Love being held so high can also be dangerous. Love can drive people to numerous mad things with it dangerously so full of craze and passion.
Love is arguably the most powerful emotion possessed by mankind; it is the impalpable bond that allows individuals to connect and understand one another. Pure love is directly related to divinity. Without love, happiness and prosperity become unreachable goals. An individual that possesses all the desired superficial objects in the world stands alone without the presence of love. For centuries love has been marveled by all that dare encounter it. Countless books and poems have been transcribed to explain the phenomenon of love, but love surpasses all intellectual explanations and discussions. Love is not a definition, but rather a thought, an idea. This idea, the idea of love, burns inside us all. Instinctually, every soul on Earth is
The word love is usually misused or misinterpreted. There are numerous meanings and definitions to this overly used word. Not many of them make much sense to me. Love is a feeling of complete bliss. Love is something that can’t be touched or bought, but is something that is much better than money and earthly objects. I can stay here and describe love all day long and still have so much more to say about this word days later. Love isn’t a word that should be used lightly, but usually is. I believe that love is the most commonly used, but most understood word ever known
Love is affection, devotion, passion, desire, warmth, respect or loyalty. You choose. It doesn't really matter which one because they are all forms of love. Some are powerful and demand attention while others are more subtle and just below the surface. In recent years, love has drifted from these subtle levels to the more noticeable ones, namely passion. In my opinion, our society downplays the real necessity for genuine affection. By this I mean that we, as a society, spend so much time focusing on only one level of love (passion) that we tend to neglect and not recognize the need for closeness and trust (friendship). Love is an all-encompassing emotion that can be powerful and demanding, but also rewarding and pleasurable.
To better understand the concept of "love", lets define the value of love. Love is the most valuable commodity in the world. We all need love just like a fish needs water. Without love, life would not be worth living. With love in our lives, we are empowered beyond belief.
Love is not a god as the fine philosophers of Greece once suggested. Love is something far more powerful and universal, for not all people believe in gods, yet people cannot refuse the existence of love. Instead, love is a condition of the human body that cannot be denied. True love is obstinate; in the way that music pours into the ears of an audience, love pouring into the heart of a man cannot be stopped, denied, or set off course. Love is a natural instinct. You cannot artificially make love where there is none or where it does not belong. Yet, the condition of being in love grows independent of all rationale. It grows places where an observer may not understand its existence. Attempting to fight love in such a situation leaves even powerful and noble families, such as the Capulets and Montagues, suddenly powerless. When love takes control of two souls, it takes the lovers on a journey. The journey is the growth of love throughout its many progressive stages. In this way, the growth of love between two people is analogous to the growth and development of a painted masterpiece. A work of art and a bond of love both have distinct stages and characteristics. A painting initially begins with a vision in the mind of the artist. This vision is a perfect vision that the artist will strive to replicate on her canvas. Similarly, love often begins on a visual level based on the physical attractions between two people. The vision of the painter is soon transformed into quick, loose sketches. The pencil freely marks the page; the artist has no control over where it goes, he merely paints. Similarly, lovers have no control over their new feeling of love that has taken over their bodies and rendered them helpless. After an artist has loos...
Love is the basis of every day life, and it gives us the power to feel so affectionately
Love is the most important aspect of human life as we know it. The reasons are because it is one of the only things that can not be bought with any amount of money so it makes it a very scarce resource. If love would have a price tag it would be for an infinite amount of dollars, pounds, or even pesos. Some people live their whole life looking for a " true love" some are lucky and find it. Some live their life la vida loca and have never found the time to find a true love. Others get tired of waiting and get married without love. Love has not changed at all over the course of history and this makes it the most important emotion in the human mind, body and soul.
Love is the most powerful emotion that most of us will ever experience. People can do some grateful things out of hate and fear, but love can push us to do much, much worse. It is often love can cause us to hate, whether it is out of jealousy, or anger because our loved one has been hurt. Love, ultimately, is a sacrifice, whatever the relationship, and it must be the most powerful force in the universe because as human true sacrifices for nothing less.
According to Merriam -Webster, love can ultimately be described as a “ profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.” The contradictory term for love is hatred, something that one person hates. With love, we can expect it to be unique, unconditional, and effortless.
What is love? Love is a very special and meaningful word to each human being. Each human being has his/her own thoughts about love to guide himself/herself to land safely and smoothly into the kingdom of Love. Without this preconceived idea of love, people would be acting like a blind person searching for the light with thousand of obstacles in front of him.